for Denver Broncos fans To me, the Super Bowl means spicy hot wings dunked in bleu cheese dressing, and summer sausage piled high atop cracked wheat crackers. Because Mike Shanahan fucking sucks, man. Sucks!
February 2005
February 6, 2005
The “To me, the Super Bowl means spicy hot wings dunked in bleu cheese dressing” poem
February 6, 2005
in which I use the occasion of the Superbowl to make oblique, shallow, and unfair social commentary directed at right wingers
So. Who do you think Rush Limbaugh is pulling for today? **** heh.
February 6, 2005
Words that just sound funny, #11,856: “myrmidon”
eg. “Is that your myrmidon?” “Yes, that myrmidon belongs to me.”*
February 5, 2005
More deceit from the ALLIED CHIMP BRIGADE
Remember the Iraqi woman singled-out by the President during his State of the Union address? Well, her name is Safia Taleb Al Souhail, and it turns out she actually supports the president—and has in the past supported those bloodthirsty neocons who, like her, thought getting rid of the tyrant who’d murdered her father was a good idea. The partisan bitch.* Question one: Why didn’t Liar McChimpyburton have the guts to
February 5, 2005
Why can’t you just love me for my brain?
I AM NOT A PIECE OF MEAT!* MY MUSCULAR FLANKS ARE MY OWN!*
February 5, 2005
Another moment of unabashed pragmatism
You ask, “can I maybe borrow, say, five bucks?” And I reply, “If I have it, sure. Just so long as you promise to pay me back.”
February 4, 2005
Armadillo Friday! Give us. GIVE US!
I’d like to, I really would—and I know you’re going to think this another of my lame excuses—but the truth is, the armadillo watched the unrated director’s cut of Demonlover last night, and now I can’t get him out of the bathroom. The Dasypodidaeic perv. But here. Here’s a proxy jig. **** update: AS A CITIZEN JOURNALIST I REFUSE TO BE OBJECTIFIED!*