“Refugee Bingo” “The Sudenese government presents, Darfur on Ice!” “Just a few silly Arab militia men sowing their oats” “David Blaine’s The Incredible Disappearing Civilians of Displeasing Ethnicity” “People Pruning” “Mulching the Desert” “No Chocolate Wednesdays” “That little African misunderstanding” “‘Extreme Makeover’:  The Dark Continent edition”* **** more.

But happy anniversary just the same, Bill.  Were I a genie, I’d give the gift of having Peter Fonda inside you.

Ward Churchill is the intellectual equivalent of a streaker.  His wannabe-provocative rhetoric “makes you think” in roughly the same way that a bouncing penis flashing across the stage during an awards ceremony or a graduation “makes you think.” That is, it makes you think, “Wow.  There goes a bouncing penis.”* Having said that, the University of Colorado granted this lanky-haired mudflap tenure.  And a public university threatening to fire a

Well, I asked for a snowboard, but I suppose a borderline retard is nice, too… Anyway, it’s the thought that counts. **** update:  The joy is spreading!

Billy Joel: “A bottle of red.  A bottle of white.  Whatever kind of mood you’re in tonight…” Former supermodel Christie Brinkley: “Oh for Chrissakes, must we do this every time, Billy?  Just give me my goddamn check, okay?”