That dolphin in the navy blue pea coat I warned you about? Turns out he was just looking for a cup of seawater and a pound of diced squid—which I happily traded to him for a couple of fat joints rolled in dried kelp. Oh. And it was an umbrella he was carrying. But you can hardly blame me for doubting that a dolphin would bother toting around an umbrella.
August 17, 2004
August 17, 2004
Jessica Cutler visits the farmers market
merchant: “…Uh, excuse me, ma’am…? Unless you’re planning on buying ‘em, please don’t slide those gourds in your ass like that…”
August 17, 2004
Random Acts of Kindness
“True, he hacked her up with a Bowie knife for $50 and a Michelob, but the real question we have to answer here is, how does he feel about what he did…?”*
August 17, 2004
On Ontology
IOL News: A new species of flightless bird has been discovered living on a tiny island in the northern Philippines where the inhabitants formerly ate them, scientists and birdwatchers said on Tuesday. The bird, named the “Calayan Rail”, is the size of a small crow and has dark brown plumage and bright orange-red legs and beak, said Carl Oliveros, who helped lead the joint Filipino-British expedition that found it. Evidently,