Boston Globe editor Martin Baron acknowledges his paper’s mistake in running a staged porn photo and identifying it as a particularly egregious example of Iraqi prisoner abuse, but in a surprise twist to the story, Baron has demanded an apology for the gaffe from Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld: “This photo should not have appeared in the Globe. First, images portrayed in the photo were overly graphic. Second, as the
May 2004
May 13, 2004
protein wisdom proudly selects…
…the Titi monkey as its annual “New World Monkey of the Year.” Congratulations to the winner and to all the nominees, a group that this year included the Spider monkey, the Red Howler monkey, the Squirrel monkey, the Saddle Back Tamarin monkey, the Lion Tamarin monkey, the Owl monkey, the Marmoset, the Saki monkey, and the Ukaris monkey. The judging was based entirely on which New World monkey sounded most
May 13, 2004
protein wisdom proudly selects…
…the Titi monkey as its annual “New World Monkey of the Year.” Congratulations to the winner and to all the nominees, a group that this year included the Spider monkey, the Red Howler monkey, the Squirrel monkey, the Saddle Back Tamarin monkey, the Lion Tamarin monkey, the Owl monkey, the Marmoset, the Saki monkey, and the Ukaris monkey. The judging was based entirely on which New World monkey sounded most
May 13, 2004
A Poem from 1968, Revised by the Ghost of Richard Brautigan, 2004
I watched a man in a cafe strip mall eatery fold a slice of bread as if he were folding a birth certificate or looking at the photograph of a dead lover. [And yes, I’d love another Diet Coke, thanks. And the check, too, please.]
May 13, 2004
Scenes from my driveway, continued, continued
Deadbeat neighbor: “What about this rain, eh? Cold as a witch’s tit out here.” Me: “Yup.” Deadbeat neighbor: “By the way, I do know who John Kerry is. He’s that dude running for president. Don’t know about the asshole part, though.” Me: “Well, you’ve got until November to figure that out.” Deadbeat neighbor: “Yup. Hope to have the furnace fixed by then, too.”
May 13, 2004
Sonny Wortzik offers a lesson in street-wise pragmatics
Sonny: “I’m robbing a bank because they got money here. That’s why I’m robbing it.”
May 13, 2004
Talking back to 80s music, 15
You go ahead and jump. Me, I’m fine here on the couch with a bag of barbecue pork rinds and the elastic waistband on my sweatpants, thank you very much.
May 12, 2004
Words that just sound funny, #31 (Guest Selection): “tweezers”*
eg. “Are those your tweezers?” “Yes, those tweezers belong to me.” **** *courtesy, the bride of protein wisdom; in an alternate universe, #31 would likely be filled by, say, “turnip” or “parsnip.”
May 12, 2004
Words that just sound funny, #31 (Guest Selection): “tweezers"*
eg. “Are those your tweezers?” “Yes, those tweezers belong to me.” **** *courtesy, the bride of protein wisdom; in an alternate universe, #31 would likely be filled by, say, “turnip” or “parsnip.”
May 12, 2004
News
Q: What do you get when you cross “60 Minutes II” and a plate of roast duck with Chilean pepper sauce? A: There’s a “60 Minutes II“…? Hunh. Who knew. **** related: Oh lord. update: this covers things nicely. Which reminds me: you know what I’d really like to see? Ordinary people demonstrating outside of the headquarters of various major news agencies. No puppet heads, no scarves over their faces,