Poor kid. I hope she gets home all right. Better article here.

Starkle, starkle, little twink, Who the hell are you I think. I’m not under what you call The alcofluence of incohol. I’m just a little slort of sheep, I’m not drunk like thinkle peep. I don’t know who is me yet, But the drunker I stand here the longer I get. So just give me one more fink to drill my cup, ‘Cause I got all day sober to Sunday

Could suffer fine as large as $5 million. Bernard Madoff, a long-time fixture and powerful adviser on Wall Street, was arrested and charged on Thursday with allegedly running a $50 billion Ponzi scheme, U.S. authorities said. The former chairman of the Nasdaq Stock Market who remains a member of Nasdaq OMX Group Inc’s nominating committee, is best known as the founder of Bernard L. Madoff Investment Securities LLC, the closely-held

When it comes to penises, length matters more to men than to women, according to a new study that reviews more than 60 years of research and debunks numerous sex myths. About 90 percent of women actually prefer a wide penis to a long one, according to two studies included in the review. Eighty-five percent of women reported being satisfied with their partner’s penis size, compared to only 55 percent

December 21, 2012 probably not the end of the world according to pre-Columbian Mayans. Screws up my party plans.

In his Times column, Ayers’s chronology focuses on 1970, the year he co-founded the Weather Underground “after an accidental explosion that claimed the lives of three of our comrades in Greenwich Village.” But this wasn’t some especially radicalizing furnace mishap. On March 6, 1970, three members of a Weatherman cell died when a bomb they were making blew up in their faces. Packed with nails for maximum lethality, it had

Killing a lobster isn’t a pretty enterprise, so instead of boiling it alive, put in the freezer to slow its metabolism, then slice up its underbelly.

In its ongoing fight to get rejected absentee ballots re-evaluated, Al Franken’s Senate campaign released an emotionally charged video about uncounted voters, reports the Minneapolis Star-Tribune. The video includes one bedridden man—with his head on a Minnesota Vikings pillow—who implores, “I may be a quadriplegic, but we are still someone, and we deserve to have our votes counted.” Related.

Mr. Obama said Tuesday that he had never spoken with the governor about the seat, and prosecutors have not implicated Mr. Obama or his advisers. At the same time, Mr. Obama’s team has declined for two days to answer questions about what discussions they had about the seat and whether intermediaries had any contacts with Mr. Blagojevich’s advisers. John Fund: What remains to be seen is whether this episode will

Whatever.