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December 2008
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December 18, 2008

Congress Gets a Raise [Dan Collins]

It’s all about pay for performance. Wank you very, very much.

Islamists Even More Ig-Pignorant Than Christianists [Dan Collins]

It seems that overwhelming numbers of them believe that Sarah Palin is Trig’s biological mother.

Hagiocalypse Now [Dan Collins]

MEET Che Guevara. Just think of him as Jesus plus Abraham Lincoln with a touch of Moses and Dr. Doug Ross. After 4½ hours of watching Dr. Ernesto “Che” Guevara heal the sick, teach the illiterate, daze the women, execute the lawless, defeat the corrupt, uplift the peasantry and spew the sound bite, I was convinced there would be a scene in which he turned water to Bacardi. You can’t

Congress Issues Stern Warning to Asteroids [Dan Collins]

After further observations, astronomers reported that the asteroid would skim by Earth harmlessly in 2029, but it has a one in 44,000 probability of slamming into our planet on Easter Sunday, April 13, 2036. Small changes in Apophis’ path that could make the difference between a hit or a miss are possible, according to Jon Giorgini, a planetary analyst in NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory in Pasadena, Calif. “We have not

Chicago Style, with All Da Fixin’s [Dan Collins]

At first it seemed that the outrageous acts of Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich had resulted in an epiphany of transparency among some of the most reflexive stalwarts of the state’s Democratic junta. Close on the heels of the Governor’s arrest for, in part, trying to sell the President-elect’s Senate seat, the state’s senior Senator, Dick Durbin called loudly for a special election to be held to fill the position. Soon,