I was just about to fetch David Mitchell’s Cloud Atlas from the study when I realized I was practically sitting on the remote.  So I decided to plow through a sixer of Guinness and watch a few episodes of “Freaks and Geeks,” instead.  No regrets so far, I’m happy to say.

Television Presenter:  And I’m just being informed that there’s been a major break in the Pwn3dagon 2 case.  We’re going live to Bob Robertson outside of the Edwards compound.  Bob, can you hear me? Reporter:  Hi, Tom! Television Presenter:  Well, I understand there’s been some kind of resolution?

From KWTX: One-time Mexia chicken restaurant waitress turned Playboy model turned heiress turned reality TV star Anna Nicole Smith died Thursday afternoon after she was found unconscious in her hotel room at the Hard Rock Cafe and Casino in Hollywood, Fla., a law enforcement source told CNN. (h/t JWebb)

…At least 6 al Qaeda leaders have been captured—one of them a key aide to Abu Ayyub al-Masri (successor to the late Abu Musab al Zarqawi, last seen imitating a construction dumpster after significant military tonnage invaded his bucolic farmhouse hideaway)—and dozens more jihadists likely killed, all in the last 48 hours, and all as part of a surge strategy that isn’t being widely reported on by the mainstream press

Via Bumperstickerist, here is word from the Edwards campaign, which has decided to keep Marcotte and McEwan onboard the Edwards Express: The tone and the sentiment of some of Amanda Marcotte’s and Melissa McEwan’s posts personally offended me. It’s not how I talk to people, and it’s not how I expect the people who work for me to talk to people. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but that kind

I want personally to congratulate the stupid cunt hosebags for holding on to their jobs.  I think it speaks well of John Edwards that when he commits to wackjob blowhard dumbfucks he sticks with them.  Besides, it’s going to be more fun this way, and to hell with those Angelfucking Godbag Catholics, and those Duke Rapists who leave other people’s cum on their victims. And I also want to state

Remember that?  Good times.

Last week, the wife and I spent five days in an alternate universe.  We attended the fifth annual Feat Fan Excursion, or as Paul Barrere, the gifted guitar player for Little Feat calls it, “Feat Camp.” It was in the spectacular setting of Negril, on the western end of the island of Jamaica.  And trust me, Jamaica is one of the few places in the world where this little party

News Presenter:  So, we turn now once again to Bob Robertson, camped outside the Edwards compound.  Bob? Reporter: Hi, Tom. News Presenter: Do you have anything new to report from the Edwards campaign on the fate of the Pwn3dagon 2? Reporter: We’re still waiting for a definitive announcement from an Edwards spokesperson regarding the fate of the two hostages.

Bastards! h/t Hot Air