Again, prolly not as important as a Thanksgiving prop turkey, but here’s the link anyway. Good thing for Kerry Whitney Houston entered drug rehab this week, otherwise the mainstream media would be all over this story… [Update:“Kerry Retreats from his Denial on Vietnam Meet.” Via Quick]

“For broadcasters seeking more guidance on what is indecent, federal regulators have some warning: Don’t use [fuck]. “The Federal Communications Commission on Thursday overruled its staff and declared that an expletive uttered by rock star Bono on NBC last year was both indecent and profane. The agency made it clear that virtually any use of [fuck] was inappropriate for over-the-air radio and television. “[Fuck] is one of the most vulgar,

In a surprising turn of events, disgraced former USA Today reporter Jack Kelley has been named interim President of Haiti, sources close to Kelley report. “It’s true. They named me interim President,” Kelley told a small gathering of reporters at a hastily arranged press conference near the US-Mexico border early Friday. “Which is way cool, because as I understand it, the job comes with, like, a private jet and a

Jeff Jacoby offers a scathing deconstruction of our broken affirmative action system, using the finalist selections for the American Advertising Federation’s annual “Most Promising Minority Students Program” as his starting point: In the world that affirmative action has made, there are rich rewards to be reaped from being designated a “top minority.” The students featured in the ad were flown to New York for a long weekend, flattered at a

Air Dork. My, how I long for those days when teenage boys played contact sports and whipped their skippies to fantasy humans. Like, say, Princess Leia. Or Jaime Sommers.

So I go to the mailbox to check for new porn mags (I’m a fan of cartoon errotica), and what do I find but an unsolicited letter from Teddy Kennedy, who wants me to know that “it’s time for a change.” Here’s a bit of his pitch — on behalf of the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee — since helpfully annotated: Dear Friend, Yeah, right. […] The Bush Administration is leading

Bravo! Really. I once spent a week in the Keys — Spring Break sometime in the late eighties, I think it was — and the trip left me with two very vivid memories: first, the spectacle of my friend Jim, hungover and soaking through a city-issue orange jumpsuit, picking trash off the shoulder of Ocean highway — as punishment for having been caught on the street the night before with

Overheard at a Subway sandwich shop just outside Capital Hill, March 17: Kerry: “I tell ya’, this Zapatero endorsement is going to hurt us if we’re not careful. I mean, it’s one thing to champion pet socialist causes — that’s the luxury of being fabulously wealthy. But to come right out and call yourself a socialist like this guy does? I’m not sure that’ll play with the swing voters. Then

In case you’re wondering, I think I lost my virginity to “Thank You” (off Led Zeppelin II). I say “think” because it’s a short song, and there was foreplay involved. Oh who am I kidding. I was done before mountains crumbled to the sea. Felt nifty, though.

Guinness. No gimmicks, no shamrocks. Just dark and creamy St. James Gate goodness — bottled with my enjoyment in mind… Mmmmmmm. Say what you will about the Micks — Christ knows I have — but those potato-eatin’ bastards sure do brew a damn fine draught. So here’s to ya’, friends. Happy St. Patty’s Day! And keep your paws off me bollocks.