Yesterday, in the course of discussions here concerning race and racism (well, I “discussed”; popular lefty blogger Hesiod frothed like an Espresso Macchiato, the bitch), I came to several important conclusions: Hesiod is certifiably insane. Every time he comments here, the smell of frying bologna wafts through this site. From here on out, Hesiod shall be known as “Hesiodiot.” Or maybe, “The Hesiodiot.” Which makes his followers “Hesiodiots.” In terms

Forgive me if I seem a little bit off today. Last night I watched Zardoz without getting remarkably stoned first, and I’m pretty sure important parts of my brain are now synaptically rewired as a result. For instance: I went to pour myself some vanilla coffee just a second ago, but instead of pouring it into my favorite mug like I normally would, I killed a squirrel with a well-thrown

Great job — but it makes you wonder how many of these things actually manage to slip by, doesn’t it? And while I’m at it, great job here, too. Tom Bihn backbacks: holds everything you need when your first option is surrender. Punk.

From the cutting room floor, ABC News, continued: 20/20’s Barbara Walters: “Let’s talk about you, Teresa… If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be and why…?” Teresa Heinz Kerry: “Wow, good question. …I suppose I’d be a weeping willow, Barbara, because I tend to take people’s pain and internalize it. As a rule, I’m very empathetic, and it weighs on me.” Barbara Walters: “…And your husband.

On FOXNews just now, Charles Krauthammer characterized Condi Rice’s performance before the 9-11 Commission as “gracious and fluent.” Racist. In related news, I’m about to fix myself a tuna fish sandwich for lunch. And, in what will come as no surprise to “progressives,” I like solid white albacore tuna. On country potato bread — itself white, until I toast it. Make of that what you will.

“Some women can’t make decisions for themselves, so we’ll make their decisions for them,” some women decide.

From my comments section, the voice of popular lefty blogger Hesiod, here pontificating (in all his spittle-flecked, tinfoil-hatted radiance) on matters of contemporary racial politics: [..] I never claimed that ALL Republicans are racists. I said that they PANDER to racists, which is a major distinction. In fact, one could argue it’s actually WORSE. Why? Because while actally [sic] being a racist is vile, at least someone would be acting

Condi Rice is so sexy when she’s fending off political grandstanders, isn’t she? Mmmm. Like to put her on a plate and sop her up with a biscuit… (…But wait, there’s more…!)

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road. A: Because he didn’t want to be seen anywhere near the UN today. Man, is that place in some stink.

Distinguished “progressive” economist and anti-war ideologue Max Sawicky, in an effort to airbrush Christopher Dodd’s recent Byrd-inspired brainfart completely out of existence, puts on the rhetorical high hat and waves his hand dismissively: The effort to cook up an analogy between Chris Dodd/Robert Byrd and Trent Lott/Strom Thurmond needs a few sentences. Robert Byrd is a great senator. His hands shake, but he is still sharp. Strom Thurmond was a