…opting instead to skip the formalities and declare war directly on France or Germany or Belgium, should any one of those feckless little demi-sovereigns try snatching up a member of the US military for some sham trial before the International Criminal Court — a body of bureaucratic appointees answerable only to fancy chocolates, breads, and a playful little Beaujolais with a wonderful nose. update: At least, that’s what I hope
June 23, 2004
My second brief conversation with a McIntosh apple
me: “Not to be rude or anything, but I generally prefer the Granny Smith apple to the McIntosh.” apple: me: “The McIntosh just isn’t, I dunno… crunchy enough for me.” apple: me: “Not that the McIntosh is a bad-tasting apple or anything. Just that, well, I like the Granny Smith a little bit better, you know?” apple: me: “Because of the tartness…” apple: me: “And that crunchiness factor we talked
June 23, 2004
Have denied having any interest in the Democratic Vice Presidential nomination, 2004
The Chrysler Crossfire convertible, 2004 (w/ racing package) French’s yellow mustard Steel Former Oakland Raider quarterback Ken Stabler Genuine humility General George Patton’s vintage riding crop The Whopper sandwich (w/ cheese, hold the lettuce) Grand Forks Stutsman, North Dakota Long-term interest rates
June 23, 2004
Jong Jong Jong you been Jong so long you been Jong Jong Jong so long
“US mulls changing terror list,” Brisbane Courier-Mail: The US said today it will consider taking North Korea off its list of terrorist states if it meets conditions to abolish its nuclear weapons programs. In unveiling a new plan to bring an end to the 20-month impasse, a senior US official dangled the terrorism carrot in front of Pyongyang. Under the proposal, aid would flow immediately after a commitment by North
June 23, 2004
Prominent African-American leader, likes to rhyme? Heads the Rainbow Coalition…? C’mon, man: Je
Jesse who’s this now? Sorry, never heard of the guy.
June 23, 2004
Safari
Shhhhhh. Be vewy vewy quiet. It’s moonbat season. I’m moonbat hunting. Hehhehheheh… update: tacos, if I had to choose. But then, I don’t recall anyone offering me tacos.
June 22, 2004
The Easy-Bake Oven poem
for Indymedia commenters Your brains are like Easy- Bake™ ovens — warming over stale dough with dim, low-wattage lightbulbs.
June 22, 2004
Yes. Yes. And, for good measure, yes.
This is a fantastic idea. What the US needs right now is a grassroots movement that doesn’t involve either patchouli-drenched puppeteers or bluenosed prohibitionists spitting scripture like it’s liquid brimstone. Slogan: “This is my country. Nothing left to talk about.” **** h/t BH
June 22, 2004
Atkins hesitation, 5
Tuesday lunch: pan-fried head cheese sprinkled liberally with crumbled feta and served over a bed of roasted, rosemary butter-braised pork loin. With steamed zucchini and yellow squash. …If the road to gustatory heaven were paved with flash-fried skull scoopings and pork, this dish would take you all the way up to the pearly gates and ring the bell for you.