Via Hot Air and the Radio Equalizer, here’s Mass Gov Deval Patrick on the message of 911: Among many other things, 9/11 was a failure of human understanding […] It was a mean and nasty and bitter attack on the United States. But it was also a failure of human beings to understand each other, to learn to love each other. Well, okay. But in fairness to those 3000 people

From Consumer Reports: Not so long ago you could count on most washers to get your clothes very clean. Not anymore. Our latest tests found huge performance differences among machines. Some left our stain-soaked swatches nearly as dirty as they were before washing. For best results, you’ll have to spend $900 or more. What happened? As of January, the U.S. Department of Energy has required washers to use 21 percent

No questions about whether the cult of the Tom Selleck mustache actually drives the perceived machismo of the Arab world, but otherwise, this Bill Ardolino interview with a Fallujan interpreter is rather revealing. A taste:

— “‘Germans’…?” — “Forget it, he’s rolling…”

On the plus side, at least we now know what it takes to land a plum job at NBC sports. Speaking of which — any openings, NBC? I’m very knowledgeable about football, have a clean, crisp appearance, and if I ever found myself alone with any of the founding fathers, I’d kick his ass for not giving Congress control over the Executive, and for allowing that whole stupid second amendment

It’s like watching a pad of pompous, congested margarine aspiring to the heights of buttery importance — only to be laughed at by a stack of waffles. But with far less pathos. And (unless I miss my guess) a thong.