Schrödinger: “Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing in there, cat. I mean, Kleenex boxes don’t just suddenly disappear, you know.”*
from the protein wisdom conceptual series
January 3, 2006
“The Schrödinger’s cat downloads some porn post” (from the protein wisdom conceptual series)
December 30, 2005
“Emanations and penumbras: a quasi-objective correlative” (from the protein wisdom conceptual series)
Her: “So, would you like to maybe come inside for some coffee or a glass of wine or something?” Him: “Well, only if what you really mean is that we’ll be bumpin’ uglies inside a half hour. Otherwise, I’d just as soon try to make it home in time for SportsCenter.”
December 26, 2005
The “10cc’s ‘The Things We Do For Love,’ unadorned” post (from the protein wisdom conceptual series)
1. lay your bets and then pay the price 2. walk in the rain and snow / when there’s nowhere to go / feeling like a part of you is dying 3. look for the answer in her eyes 4. think you’re gonna break up / she says she wants to make up 5. agree to disagree, but disagree to part 6. compromise
December 21, 2005
“The Schrödinger’s cat goes to the john post” (from the protein wisdom conceptual series)
Schrödinger: “Jesus, cat—would you please hurry it up? I’ve been holding it in for over an hour now. What could you possibly be doing in there…?”
December 12, 2005
“The more realistic ‘Tommy’ post” (from the protein wisdom conceptual series)
ding. dingdingding ding. ding thwap! thwap! dingdingthwap! thwap! thwap! thwap! thwap! thwap! thwap! ca-chunk. … … … thwap! thwap!
November 12, 2005
“The forty acres and a mule follow-up to the follow-up post” (from the protein wisdom conceptual series)
So. There’s got to be a Days Inn around here somewhere, don’t you think?
November 10, 2005
“The forty acres and a mule follow-up post” (from the protein wisdom conceptual series)
So. Anybody remember to bring a toolbox? And some timber?
November 8, 2005
“The yin and yang of intimate interpersonal relationships post, 19” (from the protein wisdom conceptual series)
yin: “Why doesn’t Hollywood write meaty roles for mature women? I mean, don’t men ever get tired of watching nothing but perfect twenty-somethings with perky breasts and no real depth prancing around in expensive designer clothes?” yang: yang: “Please tell me that’s a trick question.”
October 26, 2005
The “a belated response to Travis Bickle” post (from the protein wisdom conceptual series)
“Actually, no, I wasn’t. What I was doing was singing Hot Chocolate’s ‘You Sexy Thing’ quietly to myself. Tell me—are you always so paranoid…?”
October 14, 2005
“The yin and yang of intimate interpersonal relationships post, 18” (from the protein wisdom conceptual series)
yin: “I’m going to the mall. Need me to pick you up anything?” yang: “Sure. Bring me back something in a size 2. And make sure she’s got really perky breasts and likes football, if you can manage it.”