Schrödinger: “Jesus, cat—would you please hurry it up? I’ve been holding it in for over an hour now. What could you possibly be doing in there…?”
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Jeff, that’s….
I don’t know whether that joke is terrible or genius. I think my head is going to explode.
perhaps it’s both simultaneously….
Poor guy. He’s gonna have to open the door to find out.
If someone pisses his pants but they dry before anyone sees it do they still know what that smell is and where it’s coming from.
I can “provide” lots of these
thwap thwap thwap…damnit, the porn keeps disappearing!
Ironically, the cat probably isn’t in there at all. It probably finished its business and went… oh, somewhere. Who knows?
T/W: “been,” as in “been there, done that.” Or maybe not.
Like, “does it stink?”
That”issue” might be too subjective for some.
Gives new meaning to the term “cat box”.
The good/bad news is that you will never/still have to scoop the lumps from the litter again. So you have/haven’t got that going for you.
That sounds more like a question for Hume.
“What could you possibly be doing in there…?â€Â
Either dying or dying to get out.
That sounds more like a question for Hume.
I dunno. Sounds more like a question for Fume.
TW: corner. As in “don’t piss in the …”
BECAUSE OF THE UNCERTAINTY PRINCIPLE! That, or maybe the cat is simply constipated…
Did Schrödinger tie a slice of buttered bread to the cat’s back before throwing it into the stall? It may be spinning endlessly as the competing forces find themselves in perfect balance.
I don’t care what the probabilities are, cats can’t use doorknobs.
Someone should take that cat to Cockeyed Jenny…
Obviously the entire universe outside the cat’s ass is an uncollapsed wave-function.
Ever tried to “hold it in” for an hour? You can’t, because you exist.
If Schrödinger realized what was up, his bladder would detonate.
Because physics is awesome.
What about Schrodinger’s dog?
As I recall, he didn’t know whether to excrete or go blind, so he closed one eye and broke wind.
Oh! I love these.
hmmm…the answer is– the Cat has used quantum teleportation to enter another branch of the metaverse where he has already gone!
As I recall, we can either know the state of the cat, or the position of the cat, but not both about the same cat.
Since we know the position (he’s in the head, dude!), we can never know the state.
He’s probably in there reading the latest issue of Ebony Magazine.
CAN’T A CAT PINCH A LOAF IN PEACE!!!
”…so I took him in the bathroom and I squeezed all the toothpaste from the tube onto the floor, and I seez to him, ‘Now you stay in here until you get all this back in the tube, because that’s just the situation you created last night when you…’”
Fucking cat.
Does anyone else think that this cat would have been half as popular in cyberspace had his master been named Bob?
I mean…my God what would you be doing if you didn’t have any paper?
Or a hand to use it.
“Same” day, different…..
I’d like to retract my earlier comment (re: bladder detonation), because now that I’ve had an hour on the toilet to think about it, I realize that the Strong Anthropic Principle is nothing more than a preposterous enlargement of the dark authority of the Male Gaze into a violent phalloriginary mytho-cosmology.
And that’s gay.
mojo,
Wrong principle. BECAUSE OF THE UNCERTAINTY!
I only say this because we know the state of the cat: DEAD. It’s the only state for cats. If I’m not shooting at it, my dogs are chasing it and having it for a snack. Therefore, I don’t care about the location of the cat since I know its state.
.
That’s harsh. Really harsh for those of us that love pussy.
BECAUSE OF THE PUSSY!!!!!!
tw: waiting – Karl. For Godot. On the other thread.
Well, I don’t think– *POFF!*
Sometimes Schrodinger didn’t know whether he was gonna have pussy or not.
I loves me some pussy.
I just hate cats and think they should return to their rightful state: DEAD.
Part of the reason the cat posts are so great is because no matter where they begin, you can be certain of where they will end
I’m feeding a neighbor’s cats during his vacation. This morning I took my robot vacuum cleaner over and set it off in his house.
If I’m not there to see the cats racing around in stark terror as the vacuum chases them around the house, can I still chuckle at the mental image?
Hey!!! Did something die in there?
But… but the head is in California, and if he’s in the head, then doesn’t that mean his state is…?
Wait a minute. The state of California is unknowable.
For which I thank God daily.
Possibly the cat was going,
but then again,
it may have gone already.
If it had gone already,
no need to go in the first place.
If no need to go in the first place,
perhaps the second place would do.
Check the second place…
If no cat in evidence, wait;
the cat may be on its way.
Sometimes it’s hard to determine
if a cat’s coming or going.
The state obviously isn’t New Jersey. If it was Schrödinger could just Piscataway.