Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He saw Paul Krugman walking toward him, and man, has that dude ever lost his freaking mind…! **** [update: Richard Bennett is more literal in his criticism]

Frankenfreude fran-KEN-froy-duh ; n.: A salicious satisfaction in the misfortune of self-important and unfunny leftys. garofaloed gah-RAH-fa-lod; v. tr: 1) To find oneself on the receiving end of puerile insults, generally of the sort peppered with chimp references and accompanied by the smell of patchouli and cloves; 2) To be cancelled quickly and with little fanfare. And you know that’s coming. **** OTB

During the Q&A session that followed his speech at City College in Harlem on April 14, John Kerry had a telling run-in with former college professor and assistant dean, Walter Daum. Now, it should come as no surprise to political junkies that the hardcore Democratic base Daum represents expects John Kerry to lurch left (“keep going, go on. That’s it — now don’t stop until you find yourself sharing a

Kwame wins, but is immediately disqualified for having brained Omarosa with one of Jessica Simpson’s microphone stands and hiding the body behind a faux fox coat in Simpson’s dressing room. And by “disqualified,” I of course mean “arrested for manslaughter and released on $200,000.00 bail.” Which leaves Bill, who wins by default — a victory he calls “kinda hollow, given the circumstances.”

Stop it. You know where it’s from.

See? — in one breath, Matthew Yglesias says something eminently sensible, then he turns right around and engages in the kind of smarmy ivory tower snobbery that leads one to think, “Man, if anybody ever needed to kick off the wingtips and get wildly tongue freaked by a pair of nipple-pierced Guadalajara hookers, it’s this bookish swatch of tweed.” Tapped needn’t be just a blog, Matt. You’ve got money. Live

Other highlights from the 9/11 Commission hearings, April 14. Robert Muelller: “…uh, Commisioner Gorelick…?” Jamie Gorelick: “What is it now, Mr. Director.” Robert Mueller: “‘You want me on that wall. You need me on that wall –‘” Jamie Gorelick: ” — For the last time, Mr. Mueller, I don’t find that even remotely amusing. Now please, stop it.”

John Kerry, speaking at Howard University moments ago: “…because the President’s problem, as I see it, is that he doesn’t have a record to run on. Instead, George Bush has a record he should be running away from…! [polite applause] …And speaking of records, that 50 Cent sure can rock the mic, can’t he? I mean, ‘Get Rich Or Die Tryin’? That’s the full-on shizznat, dawgs. Are y’all feelin’ me…?

Isn’t the real story here that this twisted fanatical prick even thinks such a thing plausible…?

Speaking of identity politics, white guilt, and doubling down on eleven when the dealer shows a 6: Their people once lived in Colorado and now they want to come back. Leaders of the Cheyenne and Arapaho tribes announced Wednesday they will file a petition with the federal government to recover 27 million acres in eastern Colorado. The tribes say they are willing to settle for less. […] Tribal leaders say