Alex Knapp wrote this post so I wouldn’t have to. Which is a good thing — because I’d only end up recommending to Yglesias that he pick up a bottle of Sauza and a couple of limes, then rent himself a handful of busty hookers from Puerto El Triumfo. What can I say? The kid works too hard and clearly needs to get his freak on. End of discussion, so
May 20, 2004
Scenes from the 9/11 Commission Hearings, New School University, May 19
Former Sen. Slade Gorton: “Is it not the case, Mr. Giuliani, that your ex-wife, Ms. Hanover, crashed your wedding to Ms. Nathan in May of last year — that she was drunk and shouting vile epithets, and that she repeatedly punched holes in the wedding cake –?” Former Mayor Rudy Giuliani: “– Senator Gorton, I don’t see how that has anything to do with –“ Former Sen. Slade Gorton: “–
May 20, 2004
Enigmatistical?
Indeed, “bean” rhymes with “teen.” Both words have four letters. And both end in “n.” But I tend not to put much stock in conspiracy theories. Gosh I love liquor.
May 19, 2004
Scenes from my driveway, continued x 8
Me: “I know, don’t say it: you’ll be grilling again tonight.” Deadbeat neighbor: “Well, yeah, but –“ Me: ” — the smoke was pretty bad last night. My dogs were going nuts. Did you burn the ribs?” Deadbeat neighbor: ” — yeah, I did, but –“ Me: ” — because I warned you about those goddamned ribs. Gasoline is not lighter fluid. It’s gasoline. You rib-burning jerk.”
May 19, 2004
Words that just sound funny, #80: “blunderbuss”
eg. “Is that your blunderbuss?” “Yes, that blunderbuss belongs to me.”
May 19, 2004
Words that just sound funny, #80: “blunderbuss”
eg. “Is that your blunderbuss?” “Yes, that blunderbuss belongs to me.”
May 19, 2004
A message to the good folks at Soloman Bakeries, occasioned by my lunch
No one has ever successfully negotiated a pita pocket. No one. And that’s because there’s simply no way to stuff one of those things with meat, cheese, tuna fish salad — name your filling — without tearing it. At which point it becomes a bland, bastardized, leaky and unleavened breadbowl. Innovative foodstuffs my ass. Just stop it. Stop it with all your pita lies.
May 19, 2004
Really, I’d like to know.
I don’t get it. Is it that scimitars are just so cool looking? Flowing robes are less restrictive than jeans? What? What’s the draw of self defeat…?
May 19, 2004
Really, I’d like to know.
I don’t get it. Is it that scimitars are just so cool looking? Flowing robes are less restrictive than jeans? What? What’s the draw of self defeat…?