Deadbeat neighbor: “So, did you have a happy Memorial Day? I noticed you had the grill going…” Me: “I grilled some all-beef hotdogs, yes. But Memorial Day is not — “ Deadbeat neighbor: ” — grilled some ribs, myself. Rubbed ’em down with a special blend of spices and let ’em sit overnight, then charred the hell out of ’em. Crispy outside, juicy as a ripe peach inside.” Me: ”
June 2, 2004
Words that just sound funny, #100: “squat"*
eg. “Is that where you like to squat?” “Yes, that squat area belongs to me.” *squat thrust qualifies as a humorous-sounding, weightlifting-specific variant.
June 2, 2004
Talking back to 80s music, 23
Nein, all ist nicht klar. Und ruft mich nicht ‘der Kommissar,’ arschloch — Ich bin Jeff, lord des tanzes. “Der Kommissar,” Falco
June 2, 2004
Make a difference, why dontcha?
Well, I was going to paraphrase everything said here, then send you here, here, and here, but then I thought, what? — these people can’t follow links? Of course you can. So, y’know, off with you now. update: much more here.
June 1, 2004
Pardon my French
Overheard at Applebee’s, lunchtime, June 1. Young woman wearing black beret: “Je pense John Kerry
June 1, 2004
A few things found in Michael Moore’s fridge, the day after Memorial Day
Box of baking soda, half-full
June 1, 2004
Enemy Combatant, Redux
From the Washington Post: Jose Padilla, a U.S. citizen arrested in 2002 as he returned to the United States from Pakistan and accused of plotting to blow up radioactive “dirty bombs,” had been trained at an al Qaeda weapons camp in Afghanistan and had met repeatedly with top leaders of the terrorist network, who helped finance and equip his plans, a Justice Department official announced today. Among the key leaders
June 1, 2004
Pass DeWine, wouldya?
Here’s a feel good story: select Democrats and Republicans hope to bridge the partisan divide long enough to purchase some cheap grace with the jointly-sponsered Family Smoking Prevention and Tobacco Control Act. Offered in the name of the children™, of course. Which is all very lovely, because who needs personal choice and individual freedom when your betters are kind enough to legislate your options for you? See also: alcohol and
June 1, 2004
Holy Missives
To: Former Senator Gary Hart From: Al Qaeda, Operations Division Re: Attacking Denver, home of protein wisdom. Maps please, Gary. We need detailed maps. And don’t hesitate to forward along anything else you feel might be helpful. With kindest regards — Allahu Akbar, xxxxxxxx Al Qaeda senior staff and pawns cc: 72 virgins; operatives with no connection to Iraq, peace be upon them