I saw a TV ad today for one or another of TheraFlu’s products. This guy’s been out chopping wood—or maybe murdering the neighbors, all I know is he’s walking home with an axe over his shoulder—and he comes home a ghostly apparition because he’s been out in the cold for hours.
His wife, taking pity upon him and hoping he doesn’t turn the ghost axe on her, fixes him a hot cup of TheraFlu and gives it to him as he’s standing in the open doorway. He drinks it and completes his re-materialization, and the narrator intones:
Relieve the cold. Hydrate the body.
There should have been one more: “CLOSE THE GODDAMN DOOR! YOU TRYINN’A HEAT THE WHOLE @#$!!ING NEIGHBORHOOD!!?? WE’RE NOT MADE OF MONEY YOU KNOW!!!”
Wait. He’s carrying an axe, right?
He’s carrying a ghostly axe. But no ghostly wood.
I think that’s why he’s not allowed all the way in.
Sometimes, an axe is just an axe.
I think it’s probably more a matter of he can’t get all the way in lunarpuff. BWAH ha ha haaaaa. sorry, you cracked me up there.
There may be a vampire angle here also.
They have to be invited in ya’ know? If you don’t invite them, they just stand at the threshold.
An axe is never just an axe. I bet if I had HDTV, I could spot the bloodstains. And maybe some small bone fragments.
Are you sure that was a guy in the ad, and not my wife?
Does your wife leave the door open when it’s bitterly cold outside?