I’m just wondering if this is the year we here at PW should start recognizing a Troll of the Year. Is there enough grass-roots interest in such a project? Are there enough quality trolls in the field to make it a fair game? In some respects, it’s been rather a shitty year–but still. (Naturally, we must forbear from mentioning She Who Must Not Be Named For Legal Reasons–outstanding performance though she turned in.) Do we really want to take this opportunity to pile on those who, perhaps, already have obvious, deep-seated, mental problems? And frankly, my dear, does anyone give a damn?
Should we do it now or wait ‘til next year? Or am I just letting the fact that I’ve been drimking hevily since Friday night and still have unfettered access to Jeff’s blog cloud my judgement?
Maybe we should do it the way Time did, and name everybody Troll of the Year.
‘Cause, if you choose just one, you have to justify how that person pissed off thousands of PW readers. But if you choose thousands of people, you don’t have to justify it to anyone.
*
Sheesh. Don’t the trolls get enough recognition around here? I seem to recall that you guys spent a whole month one week devoting entire posts to the idiotic ramblings of one particular troll. You want to spend the holidays making a celebrity out of him? That’s some Christmas gift!
While we’re at it, we should make a cash donation to Hamas, ship a little enriched uranium to Teheran, and mail a few warm blankets to a certain cave in Waziristan.
Ahem,
Echoing Time’s populist choice, I’d like to nominate all the “Steves” who comment here.
Being a reformed Steve, I have had to endure harsh and upsetting treatment at the hands of all the other Steves. I am shaking violently as I write this.
Recently, a new, more verbose, and rhetorically incontinent Steve has irrupted on the scene. His profligate brusqueness, enormous appetite for bandwidth, and smug repose qualify him for Troll of the Week.
Personally, I feel I am being “raped” by this windy troll. He has forced me to change my login from just plain “Steve” – a name I have used online for three years – to the nickname, steveaz. His grand, unforgiveable offense: using the word “Dialectical” twice in one, 12-paragraph comment.
He has fatally compromised my “Steve” brand. And it hurts!
So, just like a co-ed with a Black-belt in Karate (and who coaches Kick-boxing at the local gym) who is being assaulted in the dorm parking lot, I have taken action. I yield the “Steve” field to his sharper elbows and remarkable excretionary volume.
And am counting on the managtement to take all steps it deems necessary to protect us from further troll-offense. Or is this a “Rape-tolerant” blog?
What’s the criteria – heck, criterium? Are noteworthy trolls those who skate right at the border of irritating (actus) or jump right in and piss everyone off (like monkyboy or PIATOR or whatsisname with the long Spanish name)?
Because if it’s the latter, the prize could be banning or something. Which, of course, means that monkyboy won *and* has set a high standard for a long time to come.
PS, The Good Doctor doesn’t count due to her inability to separate life on the net from Real Life.
I’m sorry… but anti-missile nets held aloft by Goodyear blimps and milehigh berms ALONE net Monkyboy the Golden Troll.
IMHO, of course.
That must have been the week that the worm hole opened up at Jeff’s house.
I am shaking violently as I write this.
I think you just made my day.
I don’t really like the troll concept and I will explain, or try to explain, briefly.
Commenting on blogs, and/or writing to blogs (like, say, The Corner or Andrew Sullivan) is just one of a range of things I do, including such humdrums as working, taking care of my family, and pursuing my many other hobbies. A place like this is simply a place to draw one’s own line in the sand, and see what happens: it may be that a quality response will make you re-think or refine your opinion (naturally, with some sugar on top.) That’s the El Dorado of this sort of thing, to my mind, anyway.
Naturally, commenting on blogs is fairly low on the list of things I have to/want to do. Normally I seek out a blog where I won’t be agreeing, I mean, what’s the point in just going “uh huh”? I pick good blogs where I can dissent.
I certainly do not buy into the troll concept enough to be deliberately going around trying to piss people off. I think the posters here are above average in intelligence, ability to express, and sense of humor.
The news cycle seems pretty well played out, for now, so I doubt I will be writing too many long posts with big words, although I will probably continue to post occasionally so I don’t forget my registration. So, for now, SteveAZ, the field is yours! Happy Holidays and Happy New Year to all!
okay, that explains why I was thinking steve was schizophrenic. poor steve.
T’was the week before Christmas
at our favorite blog,
And there’s choices to make
of which troll to flog.
There’s Actus and Vega
and monkeyboy too,
with his plans to deploy,
a de-fence of balloons.
We shall not consider,
despite anger inflamed,
the one who is know as
she-who-cannot-be-named.
So what troll shall we pick?
They all make us cross,
and frankly belong at,
The Daily Kos.
How ‘bout instead,
this holiday season,
we choose to ignore
their lack of good reason.
And focus instead,
with joy and good cheer,
the return of Jeff Goldstein,
our blogger premier!
Don’t encourage trolling. If you want to make PW a better place it would be better better to recognise the poster who frequently diagrees with the majority opinion here but still goes on making dissenting but productive posts.
proudetc,etc,etc: well done. You’re right!
(Alhough I must say that declaring all the trolls Troll of the Year somehow ceding a point….)
Good point, but MoBo’s throw-away ideas take but a moment to spot as pure crap, whereas actus’s finely-crafted legal fol-de-rol takes a certain amount of criminal intent.
The alleged JD who cites the Wiki as points and authorities and whose legal arguments get blown away by laymen deserves the honor.
And the Un-named person of the female persuasion transcended mere trollery long, long ago.
proudvastrightwingconspirator, bravo!
”Sheesh. Don’t the trolls get enough recognition around here? ”
That’s a good point. Maybe the Winning Troll should get a 6 month ban as a prize?
I agree with the old adage “don’t feed the troll”. This would be a banquet.
My vote goes to Monkeyboy. Hands down.
Steve: (the new one; not the old, good one who’s crying in his Clamato Bloody Mary even as we speak.)
I realize you don’t regard yourself as a troll–after all, you agree with us on one or two points and can probably stand erect without holding your mother’s hand–but your sanctimonious tone is, for want of a better term, trollish. Frankly, it’s enough to gag a billy goat.
I’ve used necklaces of garlic, gallons of holy water and even hired a professional exorcist to try to get you to toddle off and do something more import, but I fail.
Why, dear God? Why?
Does anyone have the Baron Samedi’s home number?
It’s cool, Steve. I was just joshin’ ya. It was high time I picked a nom de plume anyway.
Hang loose.
Jeff’s blog reminds me of that San Francisco landmark, the “End Up” at 6th and Harrison. As long as you keep your elbows in, pretty much anything goes.
I still spend a lot of time on usenet, albeit a fairly civilized corner of usenet. So I have enough unwelcome contact with trolls elsewhere, without celebrating them here.
You-Know-Who was too crazy even to be classed as a troll. More like a flaming balrog, [tw] sent back to the shadow after collapsing under the unholy weight of her own black and tormented soul.
Oh yeah, as for the Troll: if this is a multi-blog alliance, then I vote for Glenn Greenwald’s sock-puppets; otherwise, the monky wins.
Monkyboy seems to piss way more people off way faster than actus.
We should smite him.
You hardly ever hear of a good smiting nowadays.
I beleive in hearty disagreement; I really don’t understand the whole trolling hobby.
cynn brings up a good point; what is the clear and unequivocably true definition of a troll? I believe (again, not counting she-who-cannot-be-named) that it involves several characteristics. Usually there is an overwhelming emotional umbrella, be it anger (heet), ignorant smugness (monkey), overwhelming contempt for all (semanticleo), etc. A zenlike ability to generalise the commentators is always a good indicator. By my definition, actus doesn’t qualify. Perhaps we need several, Oscar like categories (most clueless, angriest, most condenscending, etc.)
Aw, hell! All trolls win! Whoever they are.
Dr. Victorino en la Vega?
“Baby, don’t you ride around with Dr. Bernice
That ain’t a real Cadillac
It’s a Delta 88, spray-painted black,
with fake leather seats from Juarez”
BUSH LIED – PEOPLE DIED!
BUSH LIED PEOPLE DIED!
Yes! But then BJTexs mentioned semanticleo and heet and I withdraw Dr. whatsisname because he was never more than merely amusingly annoying. Those two other yahoos were simply annoying – especially semanticleo who apparently thought that pushing around college students made him a real tough guy. Semantically speaking…
… I seem to recall another trolling college professor as well who thought he was the shit too.
Good times.
I’ve said it before, but a troll is a dyed in the wool masochist: he posts stupid/irritating/inane junk, sits back, reads the insults hurled his way, and plays “yankee-my-wankee”.
I find this whole post very risky. What would happen if this comment thread were hijacked by a troll? I suspect he’d get maimed by the backlash.
Then who’d be available to accept the prize?
Or is this like one of those stings on COPS where the bad guys with outstanding warrants are lured into thinking they won a prize and have to show up to accept, only to be arrested and hauled off….
Ummm, I hope I didn’t ruin anyone’s plans here….
Now, I would say that that is as accurate a description as I’ll ever see. LMAO.
Yeah. With the waning popularity of religion, some of the better punishments are being lost to history. Personally, I was sorry to see the Iron Maiden go. It had a certain elegance.
The flip side of that is the hostile/sadist angle which is not properly appreciated. You see it in high definition is someone like david, for instance. If this were a building, he’d burn the place down.
Austin Mike, you may be right; we may be playing with fire here. But one of the unexpressed rules of trolling seems to be never to troll in a post on trolling. A good troll wants to ruin a thread that’s worthy of his sword–not some cocked-up thread that was typed out with the trembling toe of some lush on a weekend bender.
Trolls have their pride.
By mine, he does—just because his tone is passive-aggressive rather than overtly hostile, doesn’t make him any less a troll.
I see your point but have a tough time lumping him in more hostile and occasional elements (heet, john, seman) and he’s certainl not nearly as clueless as simian nuts.
In other words, he’s trying to debate, he’s just not very good at it.
In the other awards categories:
Best poetry.
And the Goldie goes to—
Proudvastrightwingproudvastwingrightproudconspirator
This guy deserves to be up there in the voting.
The salvage above is my vote from Troll of the Year, he’s been wandering around to sites like this posting in my name.
Having said that however the sentiments expressed by faux-salvage are correct. I would just put it in a less of a cliche way.
Jeff I would really like to know the IP address of my doppleganger, can you provide it to me?
salvage (real one): thanks for the link to your website. I hope that you won’t take this personally but your front page has an eerie resemblance to something I threw up after drinking too much Blue Man Group themed grain alchohol punch.
Ah, the memories…
I can see that. I’m really not sure what I was thinking or drinking when I designed it but there is certainly something… unhealthy about its look and feel. Well perhaps it’s just reflecting its author.
I’ve actually got a whole new layout sitting in Photoshop but I’ve been too lazy to code it up.
Hey, salvage, no hard feelings. I’m an adult ADD type who can’t help bleating his first impressions for a cheap yuk.
It should also be pointed out that I’m too lazy and talentless to have my own website.
Thanks for taking it in the good natured goofy humor in which it was offered.