I know it’s evil of me, but boy am I going to take this guy to the cleaners. Trust ME? Bwahahaha!
From: serge guei
To:
Subject: CAN I TRUST YOU TO BE MY BUSINESS PARTNER?
Date: Oct 16, 2006 8:38 AM
From Mr. Serges Guei
Villa 11 Riviera Golf cocody
Abidjan – Cote d’ Ivoire.
Mobile tel: 0022507214687
My Dear Beloved One,
With all sincerity and humility, it is with deep pains I write you this
message of wishful assistance to my predicament. I am Serges Guei from Cote
d’Ivoire in west Africa. I am 23 years old. I lost my father a couple of
years ago. My father; late General Robert Guei was an Ex-Military head of
State of Ivory Coast until his untimely death,
(You can visit http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/2269238.stm for complete
report on this incident).
He was assassinated on the 19th of September 2002 by the rebels following
the political uprising. Before his death, he deposited with a security
company here in Abidjan, the economic capital of Cote d’Ivore, the sum of
(Fifteen Million, Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars Only)$15.5
Million Dollars meant for the purchase of military tanks and security
equipments from Russia. And whereby the the security company does not know
that the contents of the metal safe box is cash money. He told them at the
time of deposit that it contains African Artefact treasures and computer
security consumables that does not need air and sun rays, that will be
shipped to his foreign business associate abroad.
I want you to do me a favour to receive the box as my late father’s foreign
business associate oversea in your country, so that I will come over to
your country for investment and resettlement, since the present
administration is no more in cordial relationship with my families.
Moreover, the unstable political situation and the most recent inhuman
incident of toxic waste that has affected the lives of many in the capital
city of Abidjan, so that I relocate over to your country to continue my
life.
I have the plan to do investments in your country, like Real Estate and
Hotel. This is my reason for writing to you and hope you are in the right
position to give me the adequate help needed in this transaction..
Please if you are willing to assist me, indicate your interest in replying
soonest. I have considered it to offer you 10% of the total cash fund in the
consignment, for your kind and honest assistance to me in this transaction.
I have also made arrangements to cover any expenses that may be incured in
the process of actualizing this transaction.
I am therefore looking forward to hearing from you as soon as possible so
that I can ascertain your willingness and readiness to be my business
partner in this transaction to enable me furnish you with more useful
information in this regards for us to proceed rightaway, as I have the
intension of concluding this transaction soonest so that I can leave this
unsafe place.
You should feel free to call me on my private telephone number:
0022507214687 for oral discussions.
Remain blessed.
Mr Serges Guei
Ugh, I’ve even received a Christian themed version of that letter. Makes me sick,
You lay off, RC. This pigeon’s mine.
Hey, I got that one too!
It’s easy: send all of your spam (unopened), with the Outlook command “Forward as Attachment” to:
If you open the thing, you risk a virus.
If you have to know what is in there, view the ‘message source’… without opening.
He’s all yours…
I don’t know why this one tickled me so much. I just think that this needs to be turned into a C&W song.
“Complete my Resettlement Soonest” (to the tune of Battle of New Orleans)
In 20…’02 dad made a little slip
and wound up full of bullets from a ‘Cote ego trip.
But he took a little cash, from a auto tellar ‘chine,
And hid it in a metal box down here near Abijeen…
{chorus}
So we need to get from you a way to get this money
Out of the metal box and on to ‘Merica..
So just send on to me all of your life’s savings
And I’ll split the thing with you if I ever find the key..
– There’s been enough variations on theme over the years, that by now it’s plumped up enough to put together some sort of “Ivory Coast Billionaires for Dummies”. …. coming to a bookstore near you soon….
Well, maybe YOUR guy is fake, but I am sure danjuma pepe and chanaka willis are both real and going to be giving me a great deal of money. All though Chanaka seems to have backed off after my last response to him:
Well, as we say here in the states, Whatchu talkin’ ‘bout, Willia? While we appreciate the notification that Uncle Dave is dead, it almost sounds like you are stealing the family fortune from us. I am sure the family would be willing to pay you some sort of finders fee, say $100 (assuming the entire family approves, I am not sure about aunt Gerrett), but certainly nothing close to the percentage you are demanding. I say, Good Day to you Sir. I SAID GOOD DAY TO YOU, SIR.
-Jeff
“I’m not a liberal, so I can’t talk extensively about things I know nothing about.”
P.J. O’Rourke
The definition of insanity is repeating the same actions, and expecting different results.
Albert Einstein
I wonder if they get differnt strokes and willi wanka and the chocolate factory in Nigeria.
I got a similar email the other day.
What are you going to do Dan?
I would love some devious and nasty advice.