Tom Elia asks:
What could be a more perfect metaphor than three men dressed as clowns breaking into a Minuteman III missile launch facility, and vandalizing it?
To which protein wisdom answers, “Dunno. Maybe three men dressed as clowns breaking into a Minuteman III missile launch facility, vandalizing it, then escaping in a 1973 VW Super Beetle stuffed with 13 other self-important, nuclear-averse activist clowns…?”
Yeah, I know. I got nothing. Sorry.
Three men dressed as Iranian mullahs? Three men dressed as IAEA inspectors? Hans Blix, Scott Ritter, and Helen Caldicott?
Is this a trick question?
Turing Word: century, as in, it’s the end the end of the seventies, it’s the end, the end of the century.
How about “three clowns dressed as men”?
Well, in the words of the canibal, “I NEVER eat clowns. They taste funny.”
What, Pennywise and a couple of f(r)iends?
Excellent _Quick Change_ reference.
TW: means as in “If you have the means, you should certainly check out _Quick Change_, finally on DVD”.
If you could arrange to have Yakety Sax playing in the background as three scantily-clad female guards chase them out in double-time, you might have a winner.
Looks to me (from the pic) like they set off the perimiter pressure sensors at a remote (non-command) hole. Possibly the inside-the-wire AP radar, too.
Either one can get you shot. Not joking. At all.
Hey, I know! Why don’t we all go over and invade the Weapons Storage Area? Those doggies in the middle run look real friendly, y’know? Kinda quiet, though. Probably because they don’t have vocal cords anymore.
Morons.
After carefull consideration I think the only way this could have been a better metaphor is if after they got done a group of illegal aliens picked them up in a Prius and drove them to New York where they each receive a Kennedy Profile in Courage.
Frankly, I would treat their being anywhere near the silo door to an opportunity to test opening the silo.
Either they get hurt/dead as a several-hundred-ton door hits them, or they are so scared their clown pants will have to be burned.
“We dress as clowns to show that humor and laughter are key elements in the struggle to transform the structures of destruction and death.†– Actus
Wait, that was Bobo, sorry.
Typo in your commtary, Jeff. Minuteman II instead of III
I sure woulda liked to have been there when a truckload of heavily-armed and extremely unfriendly SP’s roll in on these monkeys…
SB: good
times
FEAR THE POWER OF THE HAMMER!!!
Speaking of clowns, is anyone noticing ex-establishment Dem’s strapping on huge nads and pronouncing that the administration should “take out” the North Korea missile and base? First it was William Perry and Ashton Carter from the first Clinton admin. stating this, and now Walter Mondale is on the record.
Never mind that this would be perceived as an act of war by NK, not to mention much of the rest of the world, which could have worse effects than the path the Bush admin. has chosen to pursue. Also, never mind that the Clinton admin. did more to guarantee that NK would gain nuclear capabilities over subsequent years as the result of their enabling diplomacy. These guys remind me of the little sissy who hides behind his big brother, shouting to his tormentors “I’m gonna kick your ass!”.
TW: “three”…as in “three pseudo-diplomats”
The men in question:
Maybe if we find out that Carl is Sully’s personal minister?
Eh, I’d rather not think this through too far.
In a statement on a Web site, the three men said, “We dress as clowns to show that humor and laughter are key elements in the struggle to transform the structures of destruction and death.â€Â
I thought they dress that way because they’re fucking clowns (please excuse the tautology).
Clownist. Whoops, wrong thread.
Why am I not surprised these dopes are from Wisconsin? Prolly yoopers. And what’s with the priest? Did he perform an exorcism?
“Begone, unfunny spirits! I command thee in the name of Bobo, Twinkles and…., oh yeah, Ronald!”
TW: nuclear (true) as in Nooklar Terrists.
Do you know how much pollution a ‘73 Beetle puts out?
Does anyone else think it should be a felony if someone over 50 years old is caught spray painting friggin graffiti? I mean, just damn!
It’s a well known fact that the Wehrmach, Japanese Imperial Army, Red Army, Iraqi Republican Guards – just to name a few – just laughed when merry pranksters dressed as clowns infiltrated their military installations.
Every time it happened.
They might have escaped too, except the corridors were too narrow for them to be able to turn around in their big clown shoes, and they had to run backwards all the way out.
Moral: Never bring a slapstick to a gun fight.
Dude. The ‘73 had major issues with the fuel injection system. Even a bunch of CLOWNS would no better than to use it for a gag car.
Wait, are they clowns or are they fucking clowns? Just because you fuck clowns doesn’t make you a clown, just like if a man fucks other men it doesn’t make him gay. Or so my bishop told me..
Labored and labored, still, got nuthin’.
The humanity. The humanity.
A better metaphor would be three aging, self-congratulatory clowns breaking into Musab al Zarqawi’s safe house, honking their rubber horns and shouting “We’re here to show that humor and laughter are key elements in the struggle to transform the structures of destruction and death!” and Zarqawi and his men instantly and wordlessly decapitate them, and then two 500-lb. bombs smash through the roof and vaporize everyone inside while Task Force 145 operators in the nearby date-tree groves laugh themselves sick.
The Dixie Chicks could redeem themselves by putting it in their next music video.
Did the president just rectify the eminent doamin fiasco?
Ahem,
What ?
Tom – that was fucking brilliant ! I almost wrecked my car laughing so hard. That, and trying to type while driving on the interstate in trafic.
Military Police in white mime faces, beating them to death w/ their clown shoes, that or McDonald’s suing them for copyright infrigment.
Look at Drudge. President Bush just re-established your rights to hold your property against the predations of the local government!
I started Friday early, I guess.
tw: color: Color me happy.
I can only say that I hope all of the terrible clown rape stories from prison are an exaggeration.
That’s good news ahem but I think it only applies to the Federal government. But I’m neither a lawyer nor did I stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.
Yeah, so I’m walking down the street. Got my “Nuke the Whales†matching tie and handkerchief, sharp dressed man and all.
Stop in the local wine shed to pick up a 40, when this clown rolls in. Not just a clown, but fucking clown, you know?
This Goddamned clown clomps up to me in his giant fuckin clown shoes and asks,†Do these pants make my ass look big?â€Â
I’m like, “What the Fuck?â€Â. I hate clowns. So I give him an elbow to the nose, spin around and kick him in his giant clown ass and step outside. Then this ugly green ’73 Super Beetle pulls up, and like 30 fuckin clown come spilling out. They’re all jabbering like, “ Yah, Heyâ€Â, “You Betcha!†“Laugh to Power, hey!†All the while honkin horns, and pulling weenies and shit out of their ears. Should’a known. The Clown Liberation Organization for World Nonproliferation. One of em was about to squirt blood on my tie out of his boutonniere, when a bunch of ganja smokin Rastas come running up yelling,†Jihad, monâ€Â, hack the clowns all to shit, took their shoes and ran off.
Weird.
oseaghdha:
“Why am I not surprised these dopes are from Wisconsin?”
Yeah? Well, I got the shit kicked outta me in Wisconsin once, forget it!
Tom W.: Perfect.
What would be funny? I don’t know; perhaps finding a card-carrying adult in the peace movement?
Were they Nike Air Jordan clown shoes? It might have been a simple mugging, and not a political statement at all… Probably not.
If it were up to me, I’d beat them until they confessed to being part of the Syracuse seven, or whatever those whack job apostate ex-Jesuits are called these days. The ones who’ve been arrested annually for protesting, well whatever the cause du jour is.
They don’t like B52’s, the School of the Americas, globalization, and for all I know, mountain grown coffee.
Then we could just lock them up until they pay for all the damages caused by the anti-WTO riots in Seattle and Davos.
Some will say this is totally unfair. I’ll reply, “They said Bush was Hitler. They’re right.”
I wonder if they’ll make a musical out of it?
Can we make ‘em into human cannonball’s?
And to think. Clowndom was once a noble trade.
Not even Love Shack? Man, how could you not like Love Shack?
Three clowns, a Rabbi and a Priest walk into a bar…
*sings* We three clown of Orient are…
Three clowns, Kennedy, Kerry and Murtha, steal into a Minuteman III missle silo and attempt to vandalize the missle. However, they decide to cut and run before any vandalizm occurs.
Three clown are thrown into a fiery furnace. They are incinerated.
Three clowns post at Daily Kos. (that’s the whole story)
Three clowns juggle each other. Chaos ensues.
Three black clowns pledge their honor to Al Queda and are arrested by the FBI. Their relatives and neighbors state they are harmless and wore the Star of David on their clothes. Hamas launches a crude missle that kills Palestinians. Israel is blamed. The three clowns are lauded by Daily Kos and CNN.
The great Bozo would be spinning in his grave if he knew about these clowns. No, wait, he does that anyway. Well, anyway, you know what I mean.
You know, we can actually trace the decline of Western civilization through the decline of clowndom.
Them ain’t clowns.
THESE are clowns!
No, but it may make the resulting offspring clowns, under the “one single drop of seltzer water down your pants” rule.
I have yet
to meet a kid
not scared to death of clowns
They can’t walk and they don’t talk
they’ve got painted on frowns.
A clown with a gun
I hope I never see
Would he shoot himself or shoot me?
Too Much Joy
Clowns are evil.
Everyone knows that.
My orthodontist covere his office with clown pictures.
Evil seeks its own, I guess………….
You gotta love those Catholic Workers.
How about three vandals in clown suits getting vandalized by three Killer Klowns from Outer Space.
Now thats humorous.