From the Corner’s John Derbyshire, posted under the headline “SPURIOUS ACADEMIC DISCIPLINES “:
English, of course.
We math and science students used to have royal fun scoffing at the Eng Lit crowd. “They’re going to give you a degree JUST FOR READING NOVELS? Hooo hooo hooo!”
I still think it’s a joke. Even more of a joke now than it was back in the 1960s, in fact: the folk we were mocking at least had to master Anglo-Saxon, now an elective everywhere, I think. Hwaet!
Kingsley Amis asked whether the condition of English Literature had improved, or not, since the first university courses in the subject were established in the 1890s.
The question was, of course, rhetorical.
Well, John, we can’t all be the kind of real scholars who—once thoroughly trained in the rigorous certainties of mathematics—aim to thrust forward Enlightenment philosophy by, say, coating any reference to homosexuality with the lumpy sputum of our calculated reactionary bigotry.
Or, as someone with your skill set and disposition might choose to formulate it,
f(x,y) = esin(50x) + sin[60ey] + sin[70sin(x)] + sin[sin(80y)] – sin{10(x + y)] + 1/4(x2 + y2) =GOD COMMANDS WE INTER THE FAGGOTS!
Dizzard.
Mmmm…”Lumpy Sputum”, sounds yummy.. I think I’ll have that.
yeah, not a homophobe or anything here; but I am not entering any faggots. And if God commands it then I’m taking Jesus off of my hypothetical list of historical figures I would have lunch with. Sick bastard.
Auuugh. My Eyes!
I read that as GOD COMMANDS WE ENTER THE FAGGOTS! which, as you know, has quite a different meaning.
According to my calculated reactionary bigotry, it’s four.
English major, were you, Jeff?
As we know, all liberal arts majors are evil.
If Derbyshire’s columns and posts on “The Corner” are any insight into the man, he strikes me as quite a crashing bore.
Jess sayin’.
I’m glad he went after English instead of Greek majors, because that would really have impacted me.
MC, CC, JoeB, Sean, etc – Not a Word.
Jeff,
GOD COMMANDS WE INTER THE FAGGOTS!
is represented as:
limit x/y as [x+y]-[y+y] approaches (0,0) = GCWITF
You English majors never were very good at math.
Hwaet is Old English for “w00t.”
f(x,y) = esin(50x) + sin[60ey] + sin[70sin(x)] + sin[sin(80y)] – sin{10(x + y)] + 1/4(x2 + y2) =
Hey … a blogarithm!
My father (a chemist) was appalled at the idea that I might get through college without learning any “natural science” whatsoever. On the other hand, he never finished a novel in his life, due to his intense boredom with fiction (and, often, reading of any kind).
Advantages of being an English major: if you went to a good school, you learned to think.
Disadvantages to being an English major: unless you either used it to get into Law School or lucked out in the Hollywood Lottery, you were poor for the rest of your life.
By the looks of Derbyshire, I would venture to guess that he had lots of time in college to hang out with math friends and engage in chortling speculation on the alleged drawbacks of other majors.
Of course, he doesn’t mention that he also studied linguistics, which molded error-free minds such as Chomsky’s.
I put that shit in my calculator and got an error message. Before I entered any faggots, I was hoping it would give me a series of friction coefficients based on differing viscosities of petroleum based lubricants.
f(x,y) = esin(50x) + sin[60ey] + sin[70sin(x)] + sin[sin(80y)] – sin{10(x + y)] + 1/4(x2 + y2) =
Well of course the answer is GCWITF! Look at all the sin in that equation!
Just another example of how English Lit homosexualizes a man.
/Derb
English, Economics and History are the liberal arts degrees I give the most credence too (plus classics if they have it). He should be attacking (1) Education majors and (2) sociology/poli sci majors.
I took great joy in watching all the poli sci majors get crushed by law school. It’s just about the worst preparation possible. Education majors could never do well enough on the LSAT to get in.
Steve,
I’m going to assume that you’re talking about the statistics-type poli sci majors.
Law school neither crushed me nor was the LSAT all that hard (85&#xil;e).
But my focus was mainly policial philosophy, so I’m going to assume the best.
As for the “artistic” types who came from Lit or *Other* backgrounds (___-studies), they pretty much floundered.
Not a chance “all” the poli sci majors got crushed.
-hobgoblin
(btw the /Derb comment above is mine)
Gotta confess, I get a kick out of Derbyshire. He kind of puts the piss in un pee-cee. I imagine he sipped his tea and giggled every time Sullivan got gobsmacked over some vile thing written by “The Derb.”
He also seems like a pretty good example of a product of a more classical education system that has provided him with a fair amount of expertise (or at least comfort) in getting his mind around the literary and scientific worlds.
Side note: I work at a community college (the kind of place where Ward Churchill’s degree would be terminal) and I know the pre-engineering faculty hammer on their students that they won’t take a more important class than composition. They tell their students that to get anywhere with their ideas, they will have to be able to communicate them clearly to others. What a concept.
I feel your pain, J-Dubs
Well, I think Derbyshire is being a bit satirical; however, that said I’ve seen it argued that while humanties majors know no hard science/engineering, hard science/engineering majors are more likely to have a good exposure and often interest in humanities.
And of course, education majors know nothing of anything.
If Derbyshire’s columns and posts on “The Corner†are any insight into the man, he strikes me as quite a crashing bore.
The Derb was in a freaking Bruce Lee movie:
http://imdb.com/name/nm1406373/
Yes, that’s him. Somewhere on NRO is his account of his day in film, and somewhere on the net is a clip of the Derb having the shit kicked out of him by Bruce Lee.
If he’s a crashing bore, he’s earned the right.
Oh bugger, I missed JW’s comment earlier, and we all know that timing is everything.
Sorry guys, I have to go with Derbyshire on this. Majoring in English Lit in college is a waste of time: it shouldn’t take you 4 years to learn to say “Do you want fries with that?”
On the other hand, what do you say to a Poli Sci graduate on your doorstep?
A: Okay, that was a medium pepperoni with extra cheese, right?
My spam word was “Pizza Hut”. Hmmmm.
You’re just jealous because you don’t have a cool nickname like “The Derb”.
Remember, carry the two.
Hmm. I came up with 42.
I remember the chant from the engineering college at our college graduation ceremonies…, “We got jobs!”, even if I was an LAS grad. Hey, we weren’t English majors, so the poor grammar can be forgiven. But please don’t tar all us math grads with Derbyshire’s medieval superstitions.
There’s nothing crankier than an impacted Greek major
It’s all becoming clear now. I’m in the English Department again, aren’t I? No wonder I feel so at home.
There’s nothing prankier than a redacted geek minor.
FREE AUSTIN!
If you’re going to be giving away Austin for free, you might want to do it over on that English muffin thread.
I’m just saying is all.
Liberal arts majors get laid more. Bottom line
Got a BA in English from an engineering School. Graduated with about twice the required hours of English needed. Made my beer money by ghost writing papers for all the EE and AeroE Majors who had no-damn-Idea how to do a book report, made more money walking the Physics majors through their EngLit classes. I had a wonderful five years of brewing beer, chatting up Nursing Majors and steam tunnel running while soaking up Chaucer, pulp fiction and James Joyce.
Then I picked up my tool box and went to work for an Aerospace firm as a machinist. (I did spend a very interesting year working as a Federal bureaucrat, much like getting cow pox, that year has inoculated me against any particular trust in any government.)
I make 50-55 K in a bad year, all insurances paid. In a good year I make as much as 75K.
I don’t have to suck up to the project leader, I can tell senior Engineers to get off my Gantry, I know where most of the bodies are buried in the local management food chain and I go home empty handed every night-I don’t have to generate reports the way cattle generate cowpats.
The only fly in the homebrew is that I never could figure out how to make College pay for it’s self without involving Federal felonies.
JD