[to celebrate — or more accurately, to commemorate, because honestly, who would want to do this shit for ten years, right? — protein wisdom‘s decade of life, I’ve decided to pull posts from the archives each day this month as a way to give newer readers a taste of the old pw (and to give longtime readers a nostalgic trip that doesn’t require the ingestion of brown acid, or a soundtrack featuring Journey and Supertramp), all while making myself giggle. Enjoy. Or don’t. It’s a free country, kinda.]
a haiku that, for no reason whatsoever, imagines Jesus Christ as a particularly aggressive Grizzly bear
“I hate to burst your
bubble, fellas. But you ain’t
nailing me to shit.”
[originally posted June 2007]
“You might be able
to cudgel like a man, but
I got Santa Claws.”
Jeff, you could probably go to this site, present your work the natives, and be declared a god.
Would you mind if I passed along this academic travesty? See, people are more polite when justice is swift and toothy(and in concealed carry states). Oh, excuse me. aaahhheemm
Climate disagree?
We will take your P H D
That is Prog Science
If Jesus wanted to run for President, would he be barred from the office under the Establishment Clause, or would the “No Religious Test” Clause under Article VI make such concerns moot?
Would the Atheists fear that He’d promote Christianity, or Judaism?
Would He run as a Democrat? If He did, would everyone just ignore the whole birth certificate thing? If not, how much would Soros pay Mary Magdalene to come forward with accusations of impropriety?
I forgot about that Elisha bible story in 2nd Kings Ch 2:23-25.
That Elisha fella was a real hardass.
Know what Elisha
calls your typical OWie?
Future bear shit pile
Do you know what
Guys like me call pepper
Spray? A condiment.
Will not vote for him
Romney is a Fall loser
you call me Outlaw
Romney won’t get my
VOTE! write in your favorite name
Outlaws don’t dangle chads
Is this a Mitt I
See before me, its handle
Held by Progressives?
Cranky snuck in the seasonal reference! FULL CREDIT!
If Jesus had run for President instead of Messiah the results would have most likely been the same.
Hey, my second one mentioned baseball season!
Cain, perhaps too much
fond of fondling new pussy
sits lonely, a’curbed
Pope-mobile carjacked.
Bears drive Pontiff into woods…
will Pope poop there?
Popemobile carwashed
to get windows clean, buff with
astronaut diapers1
I can now scatch off my ‘things to do list’
a haiku using popemobile w/ astronaut diapers