I wonder, wonder who, who-oo-ooh, who
(Who screwed the Bag Of Douche?)
Tell me, tell me, tell me
Oh, who screwed the Bag Of Douche
I’ve got to know the answer
When he hung around looking louche
(Oh, I wonder, wonder who, mmbadoo-ooh, who)
(Who screwed the Bag Of Douche?)
I love you darlin’
Baby, you know I do
But I laugh to see this Bag of Douche
The one you went and screwed
(Oh, I wonder, wonder who, mmbadoo-ooh, who)
(Who screwed the Bag Of Douche)
(Chapter One play Scrabble)
(Or buy her some tea and tarts)
(Chapter Two you tell her you)
(Never, never, never, never, never ever fart)
(In Chapter Three stop calling once you get inside her pants)
(In Chapter Four you biff the guy next door)
(But she gives you just one more chance)
(Oh, I wonder, wonder who, mmbadoo-ooh, Who)
(Who screwed the Bag Of Douche)
Baby, baby, baby
You amuse me, yes it’s true
I can’t believe this Bag Of Douche
Is the kind of guy you would do
(Oh, I wonder, wonder who, mmbadoo-ooh, who)
(Who screwed the Bag Of Douche)
Dan,
My new friend, who I absolutely love, “Womyn – not” says that there might be a little “NOODLE DOWN BELOW” action with our Homer Fatalies.
Funny, but not funny she says. I say funny, but I can still soak the chandelier.
Whiskey Dick is temporary, I tell me-self.
Alan Alda used to get all kinds of tail on M*A*S*H, if you remember. Women were just tougher back then, I think.
Al,
I saw her comments on the other thread; they were a riot! Especially the part about how she warned her young daughters about avoiding both “head fuck” and “limp dick” guys…
I didn’t think there were any 20-somethings that suffered from hydraulic failure…
It sounds to me like either she’s experienced some, ahem, less than satisfying dating experences while going around the block later in life (judging from the age of her children) or had a partner older than her that stopped generating hydraulic pressure…
While there may be many reasons for this, that purple pill they advertise all the time is supposed to take care of that problem…
We mustn’t scare her away. She’s the perfect assclown unguent.
Womyn-not shreds guys like assclown, Al…
I’m a lucky guy FWIW. Because of the nature of my youth, both the dedicated and mis-spent epochs, I didn’t marry ’til I was 40. My wife, a very lovely, candid, tough, and intelligent DA here in Queens is a no BS woman; very much the same type as Womyn-not sounds like. She had been single her whole life, but didn’t go in for any of that have your cake and eat it too, sex in the city BS…
After we became inseperable she clued me in on the long line of douchey, dutch-treat, NYC guys that she dated and promptly showed the door due to their weenie-ness. She is a Palin-esque feminist, who rejects all of the establishment fem dogma and just believes in self-sufficiency, strength of will, and of character…
Many of her single girlfriends lament the lack of “real” man. They believe it’s a regional thing, and that I’m exempt since I originally hail from the south. Since those ladies are mostly liberals, politically, I tell them to thank their own fellow travelers for feminizing a large part of the male population through public school and pop-culture…
And Billy Jeff’s example; “I feel your pain, now ley me feel you up…”
Over the years I’ve become convinced that feminism has been adopted by many women as a screen to narrow down the eligibles. You see, if you’re a fellow that has internalized this feminism stuff and cannot take the initiative, well, you play Scrabble in your free time. If a woman tests you by making those feminist-sounding noises, ignore them, and grab her by the shoulders and kiss her like John Wayne kisses Maureen O’Hara at the end of The Quiet Man.
I think that was Womyn-not’s point also, Alec…
Men being men, and women doing likewise has nothing to do with work related gender roles nor personal freedom…
A wise frenchman once said, “Vive la difference!”
“Vive la difference!â€Â
I hope this means “I like boobies!,” because I can’t stop saying it.
Well, maybe in an idiomatic way, Alec; let’s put it this way, they have them and we dont…
Vive la difference!
Best Wishes
Your talent as a lyricist is surpassed by your subtle sense of irony.
[…] UPDATE “I do think that the appellation ‘Hommes Fatales’ is a newer iteration of the more classic term ‘Head F*ck’.” Yup. More from Dan. […]