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The Enlightened Arrive [Dan Collins]

Lamb Cannon

Armadillos, vacuity, endless self-referential garble.

Jeff–from the bottom of my heart–fuck you and your hydroencephalic prick kid. No one cares about you and/or your little pink dick.

There, I just said it! What needed to be said!

From Goodbye, 2008/07/27 at 1:48 PM

Let’s do a bit of research, shall we? Our brave contributor didn’t leave an email address, but I’m glad he feels relieved of his burden of speaking ugliness to beauty. I’d like to make it worth his while.

Seems our visitor may be a Hillaryphile, eh?

Obama-Hillary Nails in the Coffin COLOR by Daryl Cagle Please, please shove this cartoon right up your ass! I hate Hillary too but at least she doesn’t make constant pathetic speeches that make my anus crawl with spiders! Yes yes, Obama hope optimism etc. let’s get in bed with the Repugs and let them f*ck us! THAT MANY COLLEGE STUDENTS CANT BE RIGHT ABOUT ANYTHING EXCEPT BUYING TERM PAPERS AND RUNNING UP THEIR CREDIT CARDS! HAVE A NICE DAY!

There’s something distinct about the dicktion.

It’s from Butler, PA (thanks, SBP). It’s down with the homophobe! meme:

Lamb Cannon says:

The hrc may be all these things and more–

but do they accept advertising from ABC-Family on their website?

oh that’s right, this is a “commercial” venture–so it’s okay to take money from homophobe korporate fascists…. sorreeeee

oops, better print some more “annie leibowitz” pictures (another nasty parasitic worm) with warm textured negress titties! that shows RAW CLASS boyz
February 13, 2007 3:23 PM

So far on this POS weve got these features: 1) POS, 2) Butler, PA (or more likely Renfrew) 3) Hates him some darkies 4) Lurvs him some homosexuals 5) hates Annie Liebowitz for being teh exploitative 6) may be Scott Clevenger from World-O-Crap UPDATE: Not likely, since Lamb Cannon has posted here: http://world-o-crap.com/blog/?p=8387) may also be a script doctor intimate with sausages.

Here’s my early odds prime candidate:

The Holocaust: that was a “Dust-Up” too, buddy!

From beautiful Butler County, PA (home of the Living Dead!), David Brown invokes Godwin’s Law in his very first paragraph and presumes that the Dust-Up appears in the print paper (if only, David, if only) but still manages to write a really entertaining and thought-provoking letter:

Dear editor,

I realize that the ultimate point of the “Dust-up” section of your editorial page is not to enlighten anyone, but instead to create straw-man collisions of controversy in the hopes of hustling a couple of newspapers. Goebbels would have been truly grateful for the free publicity you would have provided for the Reich. I can see it now: “Jews: Too pushy for their own good?” “Mormons: Polygamist freaks of nature?” But I digress…

Regarding the sad rant provided by the alleged leader of the “California Family Council” (my stomach turns slightly as I typed this), as a taxpayer and homeowner with no criminal record, here is what I want:

I want the removal of marriage from all laws immediately. As a homosexual, I don’t want “equality” with non-homos because their structures and habits disgust and bore me. I don’t want them to have their “special rights” anymore. Marriage should truly be for churches and other social structures, not government.

We have enough people on planet earth and don’t need to reward people for blind procreation (just because “they can”) or marriage for that matter. We hear so much whining from the righteous ones about how their precious existences are somehow in jeopardy just because people like me breathe the same smog and drink the same polluted filth from the tap they do. In fact, they need to have all of their so-called “inalienable rights” removed immediately so we can all taste the same bitterness.

Every section of the tax and legal code that refers to married people in some kind of different light from the rest of us should be disconnected. Do away with legal marriage, divorce and sharing of assets. No more “special” visitation rights at the hospital. No more tax breaks for dumping out more children, or for marrying in the first place. Nada, zippo, zilch.

Marriage was a religious institution for millenia before all these “special interest” groups got involved, and it should be returned to that status. Let’s deny them the ammunition for their bigotry today, not tomorrow. How interesting that so many of these wanna-be moral dictators talk out of one side of their mouths about doing away with big government, and out of the other when the privileges and breaks go their way and they want to maintain not parity but superiority.

Pass the sick-bag!

David Brown
Renfrew PA

Readers of this post: I think it relatively certain that David Brown is the author of this vile comment, but it’s not clinched. So, please leave it up to Jeff to determine how to use this information, and any other you may unearth.

Contrary to Lamb Cannon, some people really do seem to care about Jeff’s dick. Be polite, please, or better yet don’t comment unless you’ve something to add to what I said: Skippy’s one of the more honest lefty bloggers in my experience.

195 Replies to “The Enlightened Arrive [Dan Collins]”

  1. Sdferr says:

    mmm, let me guess–he’s black? (or actually slightly purple)

    pretty sure Condescenda-Sleeza passes the paper bag test, but o’Bummer does not

  2. Jeff G. says:

    IP: IP: 72.23.88.99

  3. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    Multiple sources indicate that IP is located in Butler, PA.

  4. ushie says:

    Butler, PA is full of racists of every color, and also idiots of every type. I am vaguely intrigued by the fact that this poster apparently knows what spiders in his anus actually feel like. That must have been a rough weekend.

  5. Sdferr says:

    Every lamb cannon comment I’ve seen thus far (3) evinces a fixation with skin color. And that where no referrent exists in the posts commented on.

  6. ushie says:

    also perversion, Sdferr, also perversion. Poor little Lamb Cannon, all racist and perverted in the dipshit town of Butler, PA.

  7. Sdferr says:

    How is it you know this about Butler, Pa, ushie? Been there? Or is it some reputation you’ve heard?

  8. Jeff G. says:

    Try Scott Clevenger from World-o-crap.

  9. SevenEleventy says:

    Let it go. Jeff should include the remark in his book. Michelle Malkin wrote a whole book about the “Unhinged”. FWIW, Jeff should write about the kind of America he’d like his child to grow up in.

  10. Jeff G. says:

    Let it go? No. I don’t think I will.

  11. ushie says:

    It’s sorta near Pittsburgh. You can look at a part of it in Night of the Living Dead, otherwise known as a typical day thereabouts. It’s…pretty white.

  12. Jeff G. says:

    Found a Scott Clevenger in Confluence PA. Wonder if that’s somewhere near Butler…

  13. ushie says:

    Seriously, Deliverance country, except norther. I had to go find a gas station there and seriously the half-toothless rednecks were freaking me out. I could just about believe in that whole incest/cannibalism/decorate the house in bones vibe I got from the people there.

  14. Sdferr says:

    It’s about 80 miles one to the other, Jeff.

  15. Pablo says:

    Is that Murtha country? They grow enormous pieces of shit there.

  16. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    Here’s a “Lamb Cannon” chortling over Charlton Heston’s death. He gives his address as Renfrew, PA, which is right outside of Butler.

  17. Salt Lick says:

    Found …in Confluence, PA

    Across the road from the railroad tracks, on Mechanic Street. Dead end, or cull de sack, as Scott might say.

  18. Dread Cthulhu says:

    Ushie: “Seriously, Deliverance country, except norther. I had to go find a gas station there and seriously the half-toothless rednecks were freaking me out. I could just about believe in that whole incest/cannibalism/decorate the house in bones vibe I got from the people there.”

    Had to make a trip out that way for business…

    Go straight past Pennsyltucky into the dark heart of Palabama…

  19. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    And here’s a “Lamb Cannon” in Renfrew, PA posting a rather…disturbing toy review.

  20. Sdferr says:

    Looks like Phil English, Pablo.

  21. Dread Cthulhu says:

    Checking the map, Confluence is *almost* West Virgina, whilst Butler is further north — closer to the Ohio line.

  22. Dan Collins says:

    That flushing sound? Visualize whirled crap.

    Meanwhile, Lamb Cannon posted on WOC here, so unlikely he’s Clevenger.

  23. Obstreperous Infidel says:

    It’s a 10 year old. I love the, not so witty, naming thingy he does. His dad needs to beat his ass and teach the boy to become a man.

    Ushie at #6, LMAO about the spiders in the anus thing. There may be more truth to that than we all care to know.

  24. Jeff G. says:

    Renfrew is in Butler County, in the Pittsburgh metro area.

    The latitude of Renfrew is 40.806N. The longitude is -79.965W.
    It is in the Eastern Standard time zone. Elevation is 978 feet.

  25. Jeff G. says:

    It might not be Clevenger. But Clevenger might know who he is.

  26. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    Not much of a town. You might get results just by calling up someone at random and asking them who the biggest prick in town is.

  27. Jeff G. says:

    Might be nothing, might be something.

  28. SarahW says:

    Oh please Oh Please, let him live on Boy Scout Road.

  29. SarahW says:

    JeffG, Lamb Cannon is old, and I don’t think Jason is he.

  30. Dan Collins says:

    Sarah refers to this:

    David Brown (724) 482-4894 202 Reiber Rd, Renfrew, PA 16053 Map
    David A Brown (724) 789-7033 118 Boy Scout Rd, Renfrew, PA 16053 Map

  31. Dan Collins says:

    Urban Dictionary offers this:

    lamb cannon

    Pork Sword,Spam javelin,Dirty pole,Beef lance,Fanny Spear
    I inserted my Lamb Cannon into her Wizards Sleeve.

    So, I think that kind of clinches it.

  32. Jeff G. says:

    How do we know Lamb Cannon is old?

    Please, please let me find this guy.

  33. Dan Collins says:

    I think we’ve got him, Jeff. I think he’s David Brown, a person of gay persuasion who wants to do you and your son up the ass.

  34. Dan Collins says:

    He doesn’t like families, I don’t think.

  35. dre says:

    On a lighter note it looks like the Bessemer & Lake Erie RR passes Renfrew.

  36. thor - the non-substantive conditional says:

    I have a good mind to place to call Domino’s and have ’em deliver an double anchovies pizza-pie to his abode. With extra cheese and triple sauce!

  37. dre says:

    Weird, Boy Scout Rd in Renfrew intersects Dick Rd.

  38. SarahW says:

    Well, I guess that’s relative but I thought I saw….anyway he calls himself old, and he is friends with the “well-armed lamb geezer”, and maybe I saw something more concrete. He does, in fairness to possible youthiness, write like a 4chan queen.

  39. Dan Collins says:

    Send him a radish pizza, thor, so he can taste the bitterness. He likes the bitterness, I think.

  40. Salt Lick says:

    I just think it was healthier when these kind of people hung out in Greyhound Terminal bathrooms.

  41. Dan Collins says:

    Don’t be bitter, Salt Lick.

  42. thor - the non-substantive conditional says:

    One can always spoof an IP address. That’s a problemo with the internets.

  43. Dan Collins says:

    thor, he doesn’t seem to have taken that much care with his online identity. I doubt it.

  44. Sdferr says:

    Lamb cannon dude’s got some serious hostility going on. World doesn’t fit his eye somehow so hatin is what it’s gotta be. My guess is troubles with daddy.

  45. Obstreperous Infidel says:

    His daddy needs to kick his ass. Anyone can be his daddy.

  46. Jeff G says:

    Do you really not know the story behind the cock-slap remark, Dan?

    Simple. Kevin from Catch.com wrote that I hide under my bed and breastfeed my son. I invited him to feel my cock across his brow — a corrective, really, substantive proof that I’m not given to lactating.

    He seemed to think I was a woman, you see. I simply felt it the most direct way to disabuse him of that notion, given that neither my name, picture, or the numerous times I’d been referred to by the pronoun “he” seemed to sell him on that point.

    Naturally, through the magic of lefty hyperbole and dissembling, the story became that I go around the internet threatening to slap people with my cock. In point of fact, though, I’ve only once made that offer. And Kevin, I take it from his subsequent shrieking about my behavior, declined.

    His loss.

  47. B Moe says:

    Naturally, through the magic of lefty hyperbole and dissembling, the story became that I go around the internet threatening to slap people with my cock.

    Wishful thinking, be my guess.

  48. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    Yeah, I’d refrain from making the same offer to Lamb Cannon.

  49. Dan Collins says:

    Oh, no, Jeff. I didn’t say I didn’t know it, I just mentioned to Skippy that he might take a little care to understand where that came from, just so he could put it in context.

  50. Jeff G. says:

    They know, Dan.

    They simply like their version better. Skippy isn’t any more “honest” than Scott at WOC or any of the other sniggering piles of pseudointellectual flaccid yuppie paste I’ve been unfortunate enough to be thrown together with via the intertubes.

    For this prick to mention my son at all, after all the shit I’ve been through on that front, simply will not stand.

    Now I just need to find out which David Brown it was who wrote the comment — or if it even is Mr Brown. Then I’ll handle it from there.

  51. Dan Collins says:

    I think it would have been better for David Brown if he copped a plea of Temporary Asininity rather than make us track him down.

  52. Dan Collins says:

    Anyway, I hope you nail him to the wall, Jeff (metametaphorically speaking), since he seems to like the bitterness so well.

  53. Sdferr says:

    Did you all look at this? http://tinyurl.com/6lztma
    It’s an obit list from july 2003, where find Rev. David Brown, pastor of North Main Street Church of God presiding over the funeral of Freda M. Goeppner. This likely isn’t your David Brown, but could be his father.

  54. Dan Collins says:

    Also, way to go, Brownie.

  55. Techie says:

    Unleash the hounds.

  56. Jeff G. says:

    I must find out if David Brown of whatever PA goes by “Lamb Cannon.” Now, how should I go about finding that out, do you all think?

  57. Dan Collins says:

    Inspect Lamb Cannon for “brown”?

  58. Dan Collins says:

    With regards to Sdferr’s post, it could be that Lamb Cannon is a satirical reference to the father, if he it is, with Cannon a pun on canon.

  59. Ouroboros says:

    Call Kyle.. Have him cross reference Lamb Cannon’s Myspace page with Facebook, Youtube and the Pennsylvania Sex Offender registry…

  60. urthshu says:

    Well, he’s been on JOM before, so they might have something more to go on, I suppose.

  61. ushie says:

    Lamb Cannon/David Brown, if it is indeed he, is one of those tragic souls, tainted by whatever happened in their youth, and thus doomed to be pricks. Because nothing was his fault! And he can’t help it! It’s everybody else, really!

    That and the inbred toothlessness, as DC noted, has made LambCannon/DavidBrown’s life a rather boring little tragedy. I hope he suffers every day. And I am sure, certain sure, that he does.

    And I always think it’s funny that, when, say, a guy stays at home to care for his kid, like the “alternative” people say they want, they’re the first and last to savage him. I call it a lack of imagination. See, they’re acting like “stereotypical Christians” again, and they’re too self-blinded by their own self-hatred to see it.

  62. Dan Collins says:

    Ooooh, that’s a good link, urthshu.

  63. Obstreperous Infidel says:

    Yes, nice catch, urthshu. Sounds like a psycho (no offense to our own psycho, who I believe to be brilliant) to me. Kill em all, let, well not God, but somebody else sort em out type of kook. If we hate all the Muslims, why are we helping so many of them? Rhetorical question as I’m certain morons such as lamb cannon just know what they hate, as opposed to actual thinking. I rode the RTA down to the Indians game today and sat across from a lady with a “Bush’s last day, no more ‘real’ terror” T-shirt, and just thought about what was going through that freak’s mind. What makes somebody that stupid? I suppose lamb cannon is on the same intellectual plane.

  64. SarahW says:

    Dan, I did notice that the Boy Scout Rd David had a former address in Sevierville, TN, and that Lamb Cannon had snarked a ( what I would think is not a common) reference to the Sevierville Wal Mart, when participating in a suggestion thread about places Matt Inglesias might visit on a journey south.

    So I think that’s our pink-dicked obsessed friend. (LC does like to mention smallness and pinkness, even with regard to his own.)

  65. SarahW says:

    Oh, Mr. LC is just your basic case of arrested development. He’s broken. I’m sorry for him.

  66. serr8d says:

    Check out #32. In Pittsburgh, no less.

  67. Jeff G. says:

    Good catch, Sarah. So it’s the Boy Scout Rd David Brown then, you think? This dude: David A Brown (72x) 7×9-70xx xx8 Boy Scout Rd?

  68. Dan Collins says:

    Good sleuthing, both, Sarah and serr8d.

  69. Jeff G says:

    Sarah —

    Where is this snarked reference? Do you have a link?

  70. Dan Collins says:

    That would fit, Jeff. Likelier that the younger would distinguish himself from the former by adding a middle initial.

  71. Spiny Norman says:

    Check out #32. In Pittsburgh, no less.

    A Furry, no less.

    Kinda nice of this vile little prick to leave his spoor all over the ‘net.

  72. Dan Collins says:

    The telephone’s already in the comments, Jeff, but I’ll xxx it if you like.

  73. Dan Collins says:

    Heh. A furry who rips on Jeff for keeping an armadillo.

  74. SarahW says:

    I’d say the coincidences do mount up, though I’m not 100% sure.

  75. SarahW says:

    Oh yes, I’ll go get the link.

  76. Dan Collins says:

    I’d say we’re homing in on certainty, though, Sarah. It seems that David’s been a naughty, naughty boy. And I expect Goliath to give him a good talking to.

  77. serr8d says:

    Couldn’t go any farther with the wolf thing. Maybe that’s just happenstance; all the ‘better’ growls were taken.

    There is this. Not as evil as the others, and strangely out of place.

  78. SarahW says:

    Link to the comment here

    [snipped]. . .And what trip to Sevierville TN would be complete without a visit to the Super Wal-Mart! No need to do anything else–it’s all right cheer!
    — Posted by Lamb Cannon

  79. Lisa says:

    Jesus you all have some wild weekends over here at PW. I come back from two days of boozing and find that you have attracted some lunatic militant homosexual. I am terrified to imagine what I will find when I return next weekend.

  80. Dan Collins says:

    Damn, Lisa. Why didn’t I get an invite?

  81. SarahW says:

    BTW, I misspoke and substituted “Matt Inglesias” for Matt Gross, the one who wanted trip suggestions for his column.

  82. Dan Collins says:

    Too bad about that no prior record thing, Mr. Brown.

  83. Spiny Norman says:

    I’ve never understood why people, nasty web forum trolls in particular, think they have any real anonymity online. I know for a fact it would be a piece of cake for any of you to find out who I am. When I first signed up at Fark.com 6 years ago, I was inspired by a guy using “Dinsdale”, fwiw.

  84. serr8d says:

    This one from the LA Times.

    There’s never a follow-up to a comment. Always hit and run.

  85. Darleen says:

    I’m late to the party … did y’all find this one?

  86. Dan Collins says:

    You’d better stay away from him:
    He’ll rip your arms off, Jim.

  87. urthshu says:

    Nobody really has anonymity, no. The use of pseudonyms though can be prudent, depending on what you’re doing in meatspace. I, for example, work in social worky kinda stuff, which is notoriously PC.

  88. Dan Collins says:

    serr, I suppose I wouldn’t have any objection to your summarizing your private findings.

  89. serr8d says:

    Found more furry.

    About lambcannon

    Furaffinity Page
    lambcannon
    Biography
    ovine fag
    Gender
    Male

  90. serr8d says:

    Is that enough, then? I’ll stop.

  91. Dan Collins says:

    I can’t believe they asked for a “gender.” Bastards.

  92. serr8d says:

    Wait..one more. Ties in with the doll post earlier.

    Executive summary: this guy likes dolls and furry animals. Going in through the out door.

  93. Sdferr says:

    Sick twisted turns to goofy huggies? You can’t make this shit up.

  94. Dan Collins says:

    Drill you furriers, drill,
    For we work all day
    For sugar in our tay . . .
    Down beyond the railway.
    So drill you furriers, drill.

  95. cynn says:

    Is this really something JG should waste his time and effort over? The guy sounds like a driveby loonachick, just randomly dropping wordbombs. Unless you want to make some kind of sensational example, I’d let it pass.

  96. Sdferr says:

    Well that’s you huh cynn. But funny, Jeff isn’t you.

    Then on the brighter side Hamas and Fatah are killing one another again, so there’s that.

  97. Dan Collins says:

    There’s nothing sensational about this, Cynn. It’s ugly and rancid and deserves to be stamped out, right away. I guarantee, we’d all rather be dealing with something else.

  98. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    Darleen’s ebay link turns up this seller:

    http://myworld.ebay.com/big.baby.boutique

    and this seller:

    http://myworld.ebay.com/winkins_big_baby_stuff

    from both of whom he’s purchased multiple items.

    I think furry is just the tip of the iceberg here.

  99. Ric Locke says:

    cynn, I don’t recall your being around when she-who-shall-not-be-named came into our lives. Best to head this s*t off as early as possible. Once bitten, twice shy.

    Regards,
    Ric

  100. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    cynn: as you well know, I’m not averse to using harsh language, and am not surprised when I recieve the same in return.

    We’re all adults who can (presumably) take it as well as dish it out.

    A little kid is a different story entirely.

  101. happyfeet says:

    (no offense to our own psycho, who I believe to be brilliant)

    damn but isn’t he though

  102. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    “Receive”, dammit. Jeebus.

  103. cynn says:

    Sdferr: I am glad I am not JeffG for myriad reasons. For one, he is the target of scurvy dumbasses. Your trite remark about shit in the M.E. confirms your own political obsession, which is not the topic here.

  104. cynn says:

    I was around when the evil doctor menaced JG. And based on what I have witnessed, she was scary. I just wonder if JG is not better off blowing this instant case off, and letting his extremely competent proxies shame this asshole themselves.

  105. serr8d says:

    Well, I’ll append my summary: our furry dipstick may be an IT designer/programmer. On a thread with 322 comments, he weighs in on page 7. Doesn’t mean he read the entire thread, though; but why else would he ever read up on “MUMPS (originally, Massachusetts General Hospital Utility Multi-Programming System)”, a dead-end programming language reserved for those doomed to the 9th circle for eternity?

  106. happyfeet says:

    He sounds like an angry gay person with issues. I just read that letter. But for real I bet the “California Family Council” is a little on the issues-laden side as well.

  107. cynn says:

    Well, whatever. It’s certainly not my place to suggest anything. But if it’s on the internet, it’s open season. Now I’m going to watch my shark shows.

  108. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    He sounds like an angry gay person with issues.

    It can’t be easy being the only gay furry adult baby moonbat preacher’s kid in Cousinfuck, PA, for sure.

  109. […] to Protein Wisdom homepage « The Enlightened Arrive [Dan Collins]  |  Home  |   July 27, 2008 Baddie [Dan […]

  110. dre says:

    “Cousinfuck, PA,”

    Not so much. Southern Butler county is growing rapidly due to property tax refugees from Allegheny Cty(Pittsburgh).

  111. ushie says:

    Oh, now, everybody–Lambcannon is Home. If you know what I mean. And I think happyfeet, at least, knows what I mean.

    cynn, this clown needs to be peeled down to the marrow soonest.

  112. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    property tax refugees

    Ah. Another lefty who wants to raise taxes, but doesn’t want to actually pay ’em. Like datadave, you’re saying.

  113. Spiny Norman says:

    #109 cynn

    I just wonder if JG is not better off blowing this instant case off, and letting his extremely competent proxies shame this asshole themselves.

    Because it was Jeff’s kid the creepy perv went after.

  114. dre says:

    “Ah. Another lefty who wants to raise taxes, but doesn’t want to actually pay ‘em. Like datadave, you’re saying.”

    I don’t know datadave. I do know the former mayor of Pgh Tom Murphy has a farm along I79 not far from this furry freak.

  115. SarahW says:

    Oh, i see someone else found his ebay address. Lambcannon is in PA. I had to go looking for that when it was clear LC was a collector of freaky plush dolls. Example

    If you haven’t already looked he collects kitschy vintage records, esp. gay Kitsch records, and has a number of “private” sales completed. Which is the more unwholesome things usually.

    That’s only notable because one of the private sales people points him out as a favorite customer and name him as “MR B”.

    It’s possible to get contact info off of Ebay but I don’t have a legitimate reason to get it. But I’m just about 99.99 percent sure that’s Mr Brown of Boy Scout and Dick.

  116. SarahW says:

    He has a one-entry ebay blog, called ” Hate Mitt”, tagged for your indexing pleasure with “homophobia”.

  117. SarahW says:

    Serr8td, there are other clues he’s in the IT biz from other comments scattered around. I think you’re right. He does mention being unemployed a few times. Fancy that.

  118. dre says:

    Angry homos, angry blacks, angry hispanics, angry feminazis, angry unionists, angry environwackos, did I leave anyone out of the Democrat Party?

  119. happyfeet says:

    It’s funny, how you can tell he thought about how best to pose the lamb.

  120. happyfeet says:

    Funny as in gutwrenchingly sad but maybe poignant but also ewww.

  121. SarahW says:

    What a horrible, horrible, twisted sick fuck of a mutant man. He’s a prolific poster, I think 8 out of ten are wadded Fails of snark – attempts to be cutting or to sneer.

  122. skippy says:

    thanks for the nod, dan, i appreciate your opinion!

  123. Sdferr says:

    It’s maybe nothing but I ran into a David Brown Prize given at Bethany College for Computer/IT students for the years ’05 and ’06. Who can tell since David Brown seems such a common sort of name.

  124. Dan Collins says:

    Well, in my blinkered view, you’ve earned it by virtue of being willing to tell the truth, Skippy. Because we disagree on lots of things, that doesn’t mean we can’t have standards.

    This guy, though, please don’t defend him.

  125. Sdferr says:

    For some reason I had the predisposition to believe furries and plushies wouldn’t get along. I guess perhaps that was a bit hasty of me. Or maybe I was right and this guy really is wierd.

  126. Sdferr says:

    weird, sorry

  127. serr8d says:

    “Angry homos, angry blacks, angry hispanics, angry feminazis, angry unionists, angry environwackos, did I leave anyone out of the Democrat Party?”

    Angry atheists

  128. SarahW says:

    Did I miss someone else posting his youtube “collection”.

    Because the hairs stood up on the back of my neck and I’m linking it again.

    This is not a nice person.

  129. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    Because the hairs stood up on the back of my neck and I’m linking it again.

    Good god. I missed that one before. Started to check out one of the videos, then realized that I really, really didn’t want to see it.

    Shudder.

  130. SarahW says:

    It’s him. The age is right.

    But it gets worse.

  131. serr8d says:

    I think that’s in a foreign language. Or my browser just flaked out.

    But it’s Firefox 3.0.1!

  132. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    SarahW, I don’t know that I want to see “worse”… can you just describe it for us?

  133. serr8d says:

    My browser just wanted to protect me.

    This guy is a wheelbarrow full of strange.

  134. SarahW says:

    Well, here’s a link to a comment of LC, just so you know that these “lamb cannons” are one and the same.

    click here for the relevent comment

    The worse is a sort of survey about sexual feelings/sexual orientation in childhood and how they related in individual cases to diapers and diaper wearing. It’s text only. His survey answers are included.

  135. SarahW says:

    He’s in his early fifties and still perving over young boys, diapers, and poo.

  136. Pablo says:

    http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=120268421691

    Oh, yes. This one has issues. And y’all turned this fool inside out in under 7 hours. I fucking love this place as it amuses me to no end. Jeff, smack him a couple dozen times for me, k?

  137. Pablo says:

    To: Jeff
    Re: Clarification

    I’m not talking about spanking. I think he’d like that.

  138. Aldo says:

    Is this really something JG should waste his time and effort over? The guy sounds like a driveby loonachick, just randomly dropping wordbombs. Unless you want to make some kind of sensational example, I’d let it pass.

    You Leftys don’t get it. When someone walks up and throws a hook at you, you have to hit back. This furry asswipe brought Jeff’s kid into the fight. Jeff can’t let that pass.

  139. mcgruder says:

    this piece of detrius washed up via the net; his life will effectively be shifted in a whole ‘nother direction via the net.

    one for the good guys. you have o idea the crap that i get from people commenting on my work. to be able to tentatively ID some of my nastier correspondants as arrested development types replete with bowel issues…priceless. in my dreams.

    bring him down, painfully. so that all may know.

  140. Challeron says:

    SarahW, he’s in his fifties? God forbid, could he be the Rev.?

  141. Jeff G. says:

    Feels nice to go out on a high note.

  142. Dan Collins says:

    High WTF is a hard note to reach.

  143. happyfeet says:

    Things like this wouldn’t happen if people were nicer.

  144. happyfeet says:

    The creepiest part is how it’s contagious and feeds on itself I think, what with that Houston person getting all… agitated.

  145. Pablo says:

    Mean People Suck.

  146. Dan Collins says:

    Maybe Baracky will change the tone.

  147. Jeff G. says:

    The Houston person stalked Rightwingsparkle.

    She’s not merely loopy. She’s…awful.

  148. Jeff G. says:

    And with that, g’night!

    ELVIS HAS LEFT THE BUILDING!

  149. happyfeet says:

    I got that today.

  150. happyfeet says:

    Bye, again. Pensive now.

  151. Pablo says:

    Yes. yes, she is. And also addled. Who gives these people computers?

  152. Dread Cthulhu says:

    Aldo: “You Leftys don’t get it. When someone walks up and throws a hook at you, you have to hit back. This furry asswipe brought Jeff’s kid into the fight. Jeff can’t let that pass.”

    You wanna see real hypocrisy? Slap one of these unwashed “peaceniks.” Y’know — the sort bitching that the Denver police want to deny them their “free speech” right to weighted pipes and chains come the Democrat undemocratic convention.

  153. Pablo says:

    Elvis is dead, motherfucker.

  154. Sdferr says:

    G’night Elvis.

  155. Dan Collins says:

    All I can say is, it’s no wonder those stuffed animals cry real tears. G’night, too.

  156. Sdferr says:

    Headline glimpsed at Insty:

    “Neighbors: Accused shooter everyone’s friend, hated Christianity”

  157. SarahW says:

    Announcement: Lamb Cannon has an email, and a Domain name registered to him, and he’s the REIBER ROAD, not the Boy Scout Road, David Brown, (unless he has two addresses.)

    The mail is furbox@lambcannon.com
    The whois is here.

    I have a feeling this is not news to some folks but there is is.

    Plus there’s a lovely picture of him in Furry suit and nobody’s posted it that I can tell.

  158. SarahW says:

    there IT is. And I do mean IT.

  159. happyfeet says:

    That’s so… odd.

  160. Sdferr says:

    Dork is too mild a term for this.

  161. Aldo says:

    Dread Cthulhu,

    This guy isn’t just a peacnik. He seems to be a perv with a fetish for kids in diapers. I’m trying very hard to restrain myself from going into detail about the way this should be handled informally, because I don’t want to create any legal problems for Jeff.

  162. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    That adult baby fetish just creeps me the fuck out, even without the “boy butts” angle.

    I don’t give a shit if people are gay, and don’t even much care if they like dressing up in anthropomorphized animal costumes.

    Poopy diapers just goes beyond the limit for me. There, I said it. Call me provincial.

  163. Dread Cthulhu says:

    Aldo: “This guy isn’t just a peacnik. He seems to be a perv with a fetish for kids in diapers. I’m trying very hard to restrain myself from going into detail about the way this should be handled informally, because I don’t want to create any legal problems for Jeff.”

    A good game of “Bureaucracy,” once an accurate identification is made, is a good second option. I have mine own preferences, however. I confess I was making a general point. And I agree — returning to the specific, manners and restraint are the order of the day.

  164. Dread Cthulhu says:

    SB&P: “Poopy diapers just goes beyond the limit for me. There, I said it. Call me provincial.”

    Fine, you’re provincial…

    …’course, so am I.

  165. CasSarahW says:

    Happy feet. That’s odd. And this is odder.

    Hotel-sharing furries, you’ve been warned.

  166. Spiny Norman says:

    #138 serr8d

    This guy is a wheelbarrow full of strange.

    That’s about the nicest way to put it.

    #162 SarahW

    That’s excellent. Investigation complete, then.

  167. Spiny Norman says:

    #170 CasSarahW

    From his posts:

    i’m an incontinent sheep and proud of it!

    Oh dear Gawd!

  168. happyfeet says:

    It’s the especially on a hot day that really sells it.

  169. Spiny Norman says:

    Umm…. I think I need a drink.

    :^/

  170. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    Hotel-sharing furries, you’ve been warned.

    It’d be a shame if he got ostracized by the furries for being a diaper freak.

  171. Jeff G. says:

    Sometimes I just have an overwhelming desire to, you know, just put it over my head and breathe it in.

    I wonder: think he was wearing a squishy Depends and a sheep suit when he commented about me and my kid?

  172. Ric Locke says:

    Furries are no problem, as such*

    Obsession is always a problem (thor, q.v.)

    I wonder if the two David Browns know one another?

    Regards,
    Ric

  173. thor - the non-substantive conditional says:


    Comment by cynn on 7/27 @ 7:21 pm #

    Well, whatever. It’s certainly not my place to suggest anything. But if it’s on the internet, it’s open season. Now I’m going to watch my shark shows.

    Your sharks replaced my crabs. I miss the endless back-to-back episodes of The Deadliest Catch.

  174. Pat R. says:

    The potential for irony is great here. All the excellent investigative work might well have scared him badly enough to…

  175. Sean M. says:

    Been gone all day. What’d I miss?

  176. Sdferr says:

    just mulching, stuff like that

  177. CasSarahW says:

    #179 Pat R. – it does sort of put a new spin on one of the first of his boojillion comments I read

    “Astute Observation by Lamb Cannon
    2008-03-25 07:03 AM
    I love your website, but couldn’t let the reference to reagan’s there-there speeches in the early 1980s.

    I was alive then and have no idea what you are talking about. Whenever that slack-jawed old criminal flapped his gums about anything remotely involving my well-being, I practically shat in my pajamas….[snip]”

    And had a fine old time I’m sure.

  178. Sdferr says:

    Ha-ha……crap. I can’t communicate how hard I’m laughing at that SarahW.

  179. Dewclaw says:

    I found a cat a few days ago… and returned it to its owner when the lost cat poster went up today. A lovely Iraqi girl who is trying to get her US citizenship here in Colorado Springs was crying as I returned her beloved friend.

    Made me feel good and better about things in general (especially after reading that JeffG is hanging it up)…

    … and then I get back from Denver and find this furry freak drama raging on my favorite blog.

    Two words…

    Fucking Twatwaffle.

  180. The Lost Dog says:

    I am vaguely intrigued by the fact that this poster apparently knows what spiders in his anus actually feel like. That must have been a rough weekend.

    ushie,

    are you kidding? Rough weekend?

    If he had spiders in his anus, it was probably one of the best weekends of his life!

    And I am also thinking right now, how could anyone who’s face looks so much like a horse’s (why the long face?), have such an unbelievable body as Hillary Swank? My God! Do all women from trailer parks have bodies like that?

    If so, I am going out tomorrow and buying a double wide and moving to Shreveport.

    Jeebus! Someone please come and put me away. Soon! I am begging you!

  181. Rusty says:

    #176
    Don’t dwell on it. If he’s on the internet it means he’s holed up in his mom’s basement giggling insanely at the monitor and not out on the street bothering little girls and boys. So in a sense you’re doing his community a service

  182. ushie says:

    I feel like running around and screaming, for some reason.

  183. Slartibartfast says:

    See, Jeff, I see this as more pathetically amusing than threatening, but it’s not my kid, so not my call. Probably I’d feel differently if it was directed toward one of my kids.

  184. B Moe says:

    I kind of thought that too, Slart, until I saw the link to his youtube collection of children in diapers. Somebody needs to be keeping a close eye on this fucker.

  185. […] worry, though. He’s proud to be an incontinent […]

  186. SevenEleventy says:

    I wonder if they have special diets that are high in fiber. And if they have pets, do they diaper them as well? Why waste good skat?

  187. Jeremy says:

    You guys got this far I’m sure

    [Thanks very much, Jeremy, we did. But for now I’d rather Jeff just use the info as he likes. It would be a simple matter for anyone who wants to check out the Whois info from your link if they’re really inclined]

  188. Cowboy says:

    #133:

    Yuck.

    That shit needs to be stomped.

    Vigorously.

  189. […] honestly, this guy reminds me quite a bit of our furtive David Brown. Posted by Dan Collins @ 7:17 pm | Trackback SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: […]

  190. Dread Cthulhu says:

    thor: “Your sharks replaced my crabs.”

    They have a shampoo for that, you know…

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