It is with extraordinary humility that I, your sometimes interlocutor, notify all and sundry who have herein read and enjoyed my varied postings, that tomorrow I will be blegging in these premises, with the kind permission of the proprietor of this blog. I have enjoyed deeply publishing my occasional snarks and delightful nostrums here for some time, and particularly your comments thereunto, and I flatter myself that some of you–particularly the ones who hate me not–will admit to have derived some small quantum of merriment and, perhaps! insight from the various, mostly jocund pretexts that I have offered up for your perusal.
The circumstances are these: my son Brendan is off at Beloit College learning Arabic, and my other son Aidan (the one who suffers from Childhood Onset Schizophrenia) is off to a special camp for two weeks. In short, I am even more broke than usual. My wife, who is generally rather forgiving about my time online (you selfish prick) thinks that I ought to try earning something from it (even if it’s a token amount), particularly because I don’t teach at St. Mike’s over summer. Honestly, I don’t expect much.
Do keep in mind that Jeff will continue to have needs, including his coverage of the Dem. Nat. Convention. I’d also like to see him go to the Blog Whatever in Vegas in September. Meanwhile, I understand that many of you will have contributed to more important charities, involving Sudanese refugees or earthquake victims or koalas, for example. Once again, you needn’t feel any particular responsibility over my temporary shortfall, especially as I’ve managed to pick up some other extra work over the summer.
It is my sincere hope that before deciding to send any money to me, you make sure that you’ve supplied yourself with a comfortable quantity of alcohol. I wouldn’t want you to feel deprived in any way. So, with warm thanks for your consideration, I remain
Your Humble Servant &ct,
Dan
Where do we send it?
Oh, I’ll make a button for that. Meanwhile, think about the pandas. I guess their bamboo got fucked up by that earthquake.
Ah, Dan, you had me at “you selfish prick”. Put up the button!
Man, the memories that brought back.
*sniff*
Bring it on. And do I understand correctly that there will be a formal bleg from the Owner for Denver Burns? I’m so there, too.
Tomorrow will mark my first full week of work since the middle of June, so I’m ready to celebrate by spreading the wealth!
stop on 8/11-8/13 at Steele hill resorts(not too far for where you are) and I buy you a drink and as many as your beautiful Irish soul will desire…
Otherwise, thanks to our very good economical conditions and mental images in my head , I feel particularly capitalistically greedy, and am thinking about my business ship surviving the rough waters….
Please do try to do the Amazon anonymous one too cause I like that one cause it’s anonymous and also you don’t know where it comes from.
Okay, sasha. Remind me, please, as the date approaches and give me directions, and I’ll take you up on the offer, thanks very much. Meanwhile, it’s obviously more important for you to stay afloat, as I reminded Dartmouth this year.
Damn. And I just bought another .44 Mag. revolver. You know how much those things cost to feed?
Make sure you have teh Amazon button thingy. Paypal doesn’t know who the hell ‘Serr8d’ is.
IndyMac guilded platinum plastic’s still workable I hope…
I’ll see if I can do both, but if you do send something by Amazon, please cc or email me so I can thank you properly.
Or, you know, just shoot me. She’d get lots of money, then.
This isn’t the Dan I knew… but Godspeed! Would you like to borrow my unicorn?
Yogifeet.
Dan, could you use some cheese?
As much as I’m in Vermont, I still never can turn down cheese. So, yes.
Night Dan. Sleep well.
Who is next? Darleen? Doubtful.
Seriously, you did this for a living for all these years and your wife bought it?
Srsly?
crap. i have to choose between dan and the pandas??
Seriously, Dan, best of luck. I’ll be happy to contribute when I have a few bucks.
ps. could i borrow obama’s unicorn when you’re done?
She figured it was cheaper than my going to bars, I guess. Also, she’s Irish.
lunarpuff, you’re looking for work. You’re officially excused.
OT, but heh…
“These people haven’t had pie! for fifty years. So you can’t be surprised if they get bitter and cling to their hobos and their hippies and their taxes. That’s what my campaign is about. Teaching all the little people in this country that they can have Bushes.”
*snort*
Where would PW be without you, Karl and the rest of Team PW…? Just let me know where to contribute.. I aint got much but I’ll share what I have… I’m Jake by the way..Just so you know.. My Momma didnt name me Ouroboros and I’m not trying to hide my identity.. I just liked the symbol..
Ouroboros, is Jake short for James? I ask, because I could’ve used that. Especially if I still lived in Arizona. Here, in Tennessee, I’m just JD.
Nope.. In my case Jake is an homage to the boxer Jake LaMotta.. My dad was a pro-boxer in the 50’s and idolized The Raging Bull.. So much so that he named his son after him.
Nice to meet you, JD.. You do good photoshop.
awe super rats, Dan.
I’ll miss you big time.
Dan,
when I have a few bucks, they are yours, Unfortunately, at this moment, I have two kids, and I am married to one of them.
It really blows me away that I am married to a 50 year old woman that has yet to reach (emotionally)fifteen years old. It’s pretty cool to have a wife who refuses to lift a finger for her own family.
Anyway, leave us a button to press to contribute to your Vermont (Bernie Sanders?) lifestyle. You are definitely much more fun than my significant other.
She’s pretty good (No, amazingly good!), but lately I have taken to looking at the driver instead of the “gee gaws”. It makes for many less problems…
But kids change the dynamic dramatically, in case you haven’t noticed. When you have a clear “Fuck off” in your life, a child can change the response that you know is right, and make you want to straighten things out.
HA HA!
How many have been married to one child who uses the real child as a sledge hammer?
Know what I mean, Pablo?
I could hardly flatter myself with the hope, that so very late in the night I should have to acknowledge obligations to Dan. He has gone beyond the demands of justice. His writings have been favorable, doubtless. They have brought out, by their invectives, the handsome patriotism well known by all lovers of liberty. But, dear sirs, a love of liberty is not a rape. No gentleman, and I am a gentleman, can stand such acts under the color of an honorable blog. No philosophy can make me above issuing a reprimand. No melancholy can depress me so low, as to make me wholly insensitive to my duty.
Why did Dan not let me remain in a snarky obscurity, in a dogmatic slumber, in a content state of Pyrrhonean stasis? But I must not complain. You, Dan, have brought out by your crass entreaties my nearly extinguished feelings, a very vivid satisfaction to be so proposed. I soothes my empty pocket-book to be propositioned by such a well informed statesman, a representative of that part of the blogosphere that is neither a blog nor spherically comprehensive in comprehension of the congress of man.
You! Able, vigorous, and well informed statesman of snark. You! Able dealer in the commerce of cantankerousness. You! In the annals of all time, has he not furnished us a compleat revolution of our hearts?
Has he gone beyond the demands of justice in his entreaty? Yes. But his inexhaustible repertory is priceless.
Let us not quibble of justice, but let us prudently acknowledge that our concerns are without object. For no justice could stay my finger from my mouse, my mouse from my mouse pointer, no pointer from that button.
Whence the button Dan? Whence.
dan sure do got a purty mouf.
gimme the p a r t i c u l a r s and I’m there.
[…] I announced yesterday, I’m posting payment buttons for my bleg to defray some of the expenses of sending Brendan to his Arabic summer program and Aidan to camp. […]