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August 9, 2008

When ocelot fluffers attack

Just got an email from Dan letting me know that James Wolcott has devoted even more time to yours truly — a rather unsettling sign that this flaccid, hound-faced fop has adopted me as his long-distance Mandingo, my tanned and muscled conservatism an affront to his carefully affected Manhattanite sensibilities, even as privately he longs to bring me ever closer to him, tugging at me through the electrically charged ether,

Bend O!ver, America!

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“The forty acres and a mule follow-up x 6 post” (from the protein wisdom conceptual series)

Not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but now that we’re here, I can’t help but think how forty acres, a mule, and one of them badass DR Trimmer Mowers would have been, like, so tits! I mean, a sickle? Tell me they’re fucking kidding me.