Let me be clear: I am nothing more than a sea lane, plus some bullshit.
The protein wisdom original poems
June 17, 2011
a haiku that, for no reason whatever, imagines disgraced Democrat ex-Congressman Anthony Weiner as the narrator of a 1970s Bread song
If a picture paints a thousand words, then why can’t I jack-off in peace?
May 24, 2011
The "'the sky is the color of dirty dishwater' poem" poem
The sky is the color of dirty dishwater, a sodden gray, like wet concrete — or like Michael Moore’s fat face after four plus hours at the Country Kitchen buffet.
March 30, 2011
The "thank god it's hump day" poem
Thank god it’s hump day! — And not only that, but we’ve made it through yet another Wednesday, to boot!
March 28, 2011
a haiku that, for no reason whatever, imagines Barack Obama as a complex man of exceptional rhetorical nuance
“Let me be clear,” he always begins. Then he lies like a rug made from dead whores.
January 27, 2011
The “why I ? high speed trains” poem
I ♥ high speed trains because, comparatively- speaking, sitting next to that one guy who smells like corned-beef hash and fisting, lasts a whole lot longer on the bus.
October 11, 2010
The "this site definitely needs more doggerel poetry" poem
This site most definitely needs more doggerel poetry. Much like a monkey needs more bananas, or a drunk armadillo needs a few more bumps, and fifty extra bucks to pay for soiling that club-footed hooker’s vintage rubber bodice.
October 11, 2010
The “this site definitely needs more doggerel poetry” poem
This site most definitely needs more doggerel poetry. Much like a monkey needs more bananas, or a drunk armadillo needs a few more bumps, and fifty extra bucks to pay for soiling that club-footed hooker’s vintage rubber bodice.
May 19, 2010
The "Reimagining the Beatles (as a function of their own peculiar mythology)" haiku
The walrus is Paul. — Which, that would make Ringo, like, coral or some such.
May 19, 2010
The “Reimagining the Beatles (as a function of their own peculiar mythology)” haiku
The walrus is Paul. — Which, that would make Ringo, like, coral or some such.