Garrett: “I realize it isn’t quite the same thing, but one time up in Canyon City, Jimmy Baio, Jackie Earle Haley, and I were so high from huffing model glue that we actually rummaged through a Quizno’s dumpster for an overtoasted cheese steak , then cut it with a handful of ground-up Sudafed and snorted it. Tasted just like chicken! Or maybe Lauren Tewes’ squeezebox, if you can believe Baio.
“Anyway, to make a long story short, the upshot was, none of us so much as sneezed for well over a month. So let’s not judge Keith too harshly, because it’s possible that snorting your dead Pop might have some kind of kickass medical benefit that science hasn’t yet uncovered. Like curing cancer. Or, you know, acting like heroin—only a special kind of heroin that simultaneously reprimands you for using it and threatens to cut you off financially if you don’t get a fucking job and stop leaving empty Doritos bags all over the basement.”*
Those were pharmaceutical-grade ashes.
You win, babe.
Lauren Tewes? No man, I told him I like ‘em young, it was really Jill Whelan!
Interesting, Tewes is pronounced such that it rhymes with “squeeze”
Snorting your dad’s ashes with coke is so Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas… a funeral high, that must be.
Will snorting your father’s ashes give you a deviated septum?
I know from experience that having your nose broken during a furious mosh session gives a deviated septum.
Gullible wingnuts fooled again.
http://tinyurl.com/yrnzvg
So, marky, are you heading over to Fark to tell all these people they were fooled again?
Because, really, we were all taking this so seriously until you showed up. I count, oh, zero serious comments before yours.
(And, yeah, Fark posted a follow-up with Richards’ “I was joking” statement. But the thread at Fark had a lot more serious comments than this one.)
Oh, I forgot something:
You humorless git.
I think his story was that he fell out of a coconut tree and landed face down where his dad’s ashes were buried and was forced to snort them.
He is now resting comfortably at home and wondering when the Toronto police are going give him back the 22oz of herion they stole from him
Are you saying Leif Garret made that story up, RC?
Serious like these RC?
What a wanker. Can’t even tell the truth about something as meaningless as this.
And where, exactly, do you see any evidence of that?
Keith is a Sagittarius. A rascally bastard by nature. I’ve had no doubt that he was having a larf with the journo. Which you can afford to do when you’ve got more money than God and all the pussy you can handle.
tw: money97
Percentile?
Considering the ritual cannibalism in my ancestral heritage, I probably can’t be as judgmental about this as I should…
It is a rare talent to combine sanctimony and ignorance in one statement. Congrats on that–your mother would be proud.
Someone tell every major news outlet in the country that they are invested with wingnuts(EXCEPT MTV–and how it makes me laugh that mark thinks he scooped us by citing that hotbed of journalistic panache).
Having said that–would anyone be surprised if Keith, had in fact, done this?
Didn’t think so.
I have to go check MTV now for their coverage of the US/ROK free trade agreement.
I actually wrote a post about this time last year about Keith dying, and people lining up to snort his ashes.
Fooled into perusing one of your comments, maybe.
Wanker markg8? I assure you that we all know exactly who is the one person who has his hand firmly grasping himself.
We just want to advise you to let go slowly.
BS. There were jokes over there, too. I didn’t say there weren’t, asshat. There were comments like this, though:
Wow, those were hard to find. Wonder why you didn’t notice them.
Maybe because you’re a dishonest prick?
WHY DO YOU HATE LEIF GARRETT, MARKG8?
Interesting ideas… I wonder how the Hollywood media would portray this?