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Putzpah [Dan Collins]

His Silky Pwn3yness:

“I think that Jesus would be disappointed in our ignoring the plight of those around us who are suffering and our focus on our own selfish short-term needs,” Edwards told the site. “I think he would be appalled, actually.”

Yes, I clearly remember the part from the Sermon on the Mount where the Lord said, “Blessed are the Ambulance Chasers.  Not.”

And in the latter days (eschewing his former preference for the humble), the Lord will make His Truth known to a movie mogul, who will have the same initials as the Lord: JFC.

Edwards told Kuo he stood by a decision to keep two bloggers on his staff despite their provocative writings criticizing the Catholic Church. Edwards said he also found the writing offensive, but “decided to forgive them and stand by them, knowing there would be potential political consequences for that.”

Edwards is just so forgiving on behalf of Catholics that it makes me tingly.

Meanwhile, a slur against Edwards ought to translate into billable hours, wot?

The Edwards camp is now seeking to capitalize on the slur by soliciting $100,000 in “Coulter Cash” to “show that inflaming prejudice to attack progressive leaders will only backfire.”

I can only conclude that this ninny has surrounded himself with morons.  This business of secular proggs all vying to demonstrate that they’re more Christianny than the others is going to be both disgusting and deliciously funny.

QuasiMoDo: Sanctuary!

26 Replies to “Putzpah [Dan Collins]”

  1. Eben Flood says:

    I’m wondering, does purchasing a multimillion dollar home count as being selfish in Baby Jesus’ eyes?

  2. moflicky says:

    Even tho he does talk like Ricky Bobby, I think Silky prays to the Grown-up Jesus, not the Baby Jesus.

  3. furriskey says:

    “I think he would be appalled, actually.”

    What is this? A Prince Charles soundalike contest?

  4. N. O'Brain says:

    …soliciting $100,000 in “Coulter Cash”

    What, does he need a new ambulance?

  5. BJTexs says:

    Edward’s has elected to appeal to the “godbag” south by combining his “John Corzine” rich man’s guilt with the Christian imperative. He hopes that this delicious combination of mainstream progressive thought with olde tyme Jesus religion will somehow endear him to the fascisti rednecks who have torpedoed so many Democratic Presidential aspirations.

    The good news is that he can affect a southern accent without sounding like a pandering ignoramous. However, he can’t help the fact that he still looks and sounds like a metrosexual carpetbagger.

  6. Dan Collins says:

    Evangeline Lilly disappoints.

  7. alphie says:

    Do the Republicans have any candidates who are:

    1. Christian

    2. Worth less than, say, $100 million?

    I’d say the people who are lookin’ fer poor, religious candidates got only one choice this time around…Slim Pickens.

  8. Dale says:

    John Edwards has some great Biblical passages to refer to.

    “In My Father’s house there are many mansions. But not like the bitchin one Silky Pony has in NC. Holy Me, that place is huge. Sure he clear cut a bunch of timber, and built it far enough up there to keep the poor (blessed are they) from showing up unannounced. But, hey, there’s enough room to give another sermon on the mount in his bathroom!”

    Or something like that…

  9. Carin says:

    I think that Jesus would be disappointed in our ignoring the plight of those around us who are suffering and our focus on our own selfish short-term needs,”

    Since I spent yesterday preparing and serving lunch at homeless shelter, my conscience is clear.

  10. Carin says:

    I’d say the people who are lookin’ fer poor, religious candidates got only one choice this time around…Slim Pickens.

    As long as they are not hypocrites, I don’t care how much money they have.

  11. Dale says:

    By the way, I do feel remorse for using the Lord’s Word for humor’s sake.

    I just find the hypocrisy incredible. I don’t claim that I have a lock on the whole “Being a follower of Jesus” thing, but I don’t say “Who Would Jesus Sue” either.

  12. Jesus loves faggots this I know, for the bible tells me so.

    He especially loves those ones that aren’t really faggots but are just really in tune with their manicure consultants. He especially loves them if they live in big mansions and beg for money.

    At this point in american politics I think my vote goes for the first guy/gurl/toaster oven who claims his/her/its allegiance to satan. At least then I’d finally understand where he/she/it were coming from.

    BTW, does the fact that alot of my friends are faggots make it ok to for me to say the word faggot? Is that still the case? I am not sure, I don’t want to go to jail or anything.

  13. BJTexs says:

    Action Chimpâ„¢

    Let’s try to remember that when any presidential candidates invoke Christ when refering to the poor as a way to boost their own image that Christ was materially poor, as was Mother Theresa and the vast majority of people who work day in and day out with poverty.

    Let’s also try to remember that just because someone trumpets himself as the Champion of the Poor, his deeds may not match his words.

    But bananas are still a great source of potasium, no matter what anyone says.

  14. Pablo says:

    Right, hiring a vaginal supremacist who calls people godbags and defames the very basis of all Christianity is a defensible act of kindness. Especially if she’s got an oft expressed hatred for men in general and that idiotic American practice of requiring evidence as a prerequisite to conviction. Everyone is entitled to their opinion! But call him a faggot and you’re the fucking devil with no place in political discourse.

    I wonder if that head blogger spot is still open.

  15. Blue Hen says:

    “Do the Republicans have any candidates who are:

    1. Christian

    2. Worth less than, say, $100 million?

    I’d say the people who are lookin’ fer poor, religious candidates got only one choice this time around…Slim Pickens.”

    So who’s looking for a religious candidate? Would that be you Alphie? Perhaps that candidate can then perform a miracle and you would finally be able to contribute to a thread without making an ass of yourself. And I don’t refer to the one that Jesus rode into Jerusalem.

    Perhaps there are people here who would like a candidate that was religious. I’m not aware of any that prefer ones who brazenly pander to the room that they’re in to the extent that Kerry or Edwards has done.

  16. ahem says:

    I think that Jesus would be disappointed in our ignoring the fact that most Democrats are religious hypocrites and voting for them anyway.

  17. anotheranon says:

    I agree with Edwards that the overwhelming majority of people are not answering God’s call to help those less fortunate than themselves.  Take Edwards, for example.  Unlike him, I’m too poor to afford a Bible that isn’t missing the pages where Jesus tells us to use the coercive power of the state to remedy this situation.  Hey Johnny, can you help a brother (in Christ) out?

    tw: from each91, to each91

  18. mojo says:

    ”…because slaughtering an Indian isn’t really something Jesus would do.”

    — Firesign Theatre, “First Thanksgiving”

    Between Johnny, Hilly and Barry, it’s kinda like “Panderer’s Row”, if I can make a Matt Helm reference.

  19. Eben Flood says:

    Evangeline Lilly disappoints.

    Come on, do you really think a woman who dates Mariadoc Brandybuck would be interested in a Man?  They’re so…violent.

  20. MarkD says:

    The aphid is evidently unaware that Article VI of the Constitution prohibits religious tests for any office.

  21. BJTexs says:

    MarkD;

    Heh

    The Action Chimpâ„¢ once tried to argue that the constitution forbids Military Enlistments for more than one year, completely missing the language that states the funding nature of the one year restriction.

    One gets the impression that alpo© was taking home economics instead of US history in high school.

    Knit one, perl two…

  22. Squid says:

    I always thought Jesus’ middle initial was H…

  23. Dan Collins says:

    That’s what they want you to think, Squid.

  24. Rob B. says:

    Why call it “Coulter cash?” Couldn’t she sue him for raising money using her name sake without authorization?

    Any good lawyer would know that.

  25. Scape-Goat Trainee says:

    Do the Republicans have any candidates who are:

    1. Christian

    2. Worth less than, say, $100 million?

    I’d say the people who are lookin’ fer poor, religious candidates got only one choice this time around…Slim Pickens.

    Do the Democrats have any candidates that aren’t engaging in Class Warfare? Didn’t think so.

    Jesus was all about PERSONAL Responsibility – Not making The Government responsible for your fellow man, but making YOU responsible on a personal level. Something Conservatives apparently understand far better than Libs since they contribute on a personal level much more than Libs do. Funny that.

    Just goes to show – Libs got no problem taking money from OTHER people to pay for the Poor, just not themselves.

    That’s called being a hypocrite…

  26. lee says:

    I can’t believe you people are calling fagboy a hypocrite. Why, wasn’t it Him who promised, during the last election, if we elected Him and Kerry the lame would walk and the blind would see?

    Man you guys are cynics!

Comments are closed.