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Mind Reader [Dan Collins]

From this article in the Guardian, scientists using new technology that gives real-time images of neural activity are able to monitor with some accuracy people’s intentions.

Men everywhere are busted.

In other positive news for women, soon men will have no excuse for not being able to read their minds.

17 Replies to “Mind Reader [Dan Collins]”

  1. Slartibartfast says:

    It’s just nonstop bad news today, isn’t it?

  2. B Moe says:

    The technology could also drive advances in brain-controlled computers and machinery to boost the quality of life for disabled people. Being able to read thoughts as they arise in a person’s mind could lead to computers that allow people to operate email and the internet using thought alone, and write with word processors that can predict which word or sentence you want to type .

    Just think, someday Goldstein will blog and vacuum simultaneously- with his mind.

    How can that be a bad thing, slart?

  3. Robert says:

    “men will have no excuse for not being able to read their minds.”

    I have no problem reading my mind. It is fairly simple. It is her mind that continues to baffle me. Take my wife, please …

  4. Great Mencken's Ghost! says:

    “But honey, it can’t read a signal that faint…”

  5. paul ilc says:

    So let’s be clear about this, Dan, you are saying women actually have minds? And I thought they were just pleasure machines. Well, you learn something new every day…

  6. Bison Six says:

    Let’s just try to keep this technology away from Paris Hilton’s mind. Otherwise we’ll all be driven mad by whatever lurks in there.

  7. Great Mencken's Ghost! says:

    Bison Six:  “That is not dead which can eternal lie…”

  8. McGehee says:

    Her: “Honey, hold still a minute, I want to read your mind.”

    Him:

    Her:

    Him:

    Her:

    Him:

    Her:

    Him: “Well?”

    Her: “I’m waiting for the ‘Girls Gone Wild’ ads to end and get back to the regular programming.”

    Him: “That is the regular programming.”

  9. ahem says:

    Bison: And just who is this hyptothetical person who’s interested in Paris Hilton’s mind?

  10. matt collins says:

    now us right-wingers will have to start wearing aluminum foil hats as well…

    reminds me of Sneeches on the beaches.

  11. Bill D. Cat says:

    Yikes …… better come with protective gear included ……titanium cup , kevlar suit , riot helmet , you get the picture .

  12. Even if I could read a woman’s mind, I wouldn’t give her the SATISFACTION!

  13. In other positive news for women, soon men will have no excuse for not being able to read their minds.

    Who says the device works on different species?

    tw: child67.  More like child63, thankyew…

  14. Dan Collins says:

    If I could read your mind, love,

    What a tale your thoughts could tell:

    Just how you loathe my drinking,

    How my feet and my socks do smell.

    When you reach the part where I scratch myself

    You really feel disgust,

    Put up with it you must.

    Cuz if you sent me packing then you have to take the trash out by yourself

    And reach things on the shelf.

    I never knew that you felt this way and I’ve got to say that I just don’t get it,

    Other people seem okay with the way I am and you can’t just take it back.

  15. I bet, even if women could read men’s minds, they’d still want to know what we were really thinking.

  16. Pablo says:

    i suppose i can read Chinese too, in that i can see it and identify the differences between charachters.  But I haven’t got a fucking clue about what it means.

  17. McGehee says:

    Pablo, are you suggesting that, as far as alphoo is concerned, we’re all talking in Chinese?

    ‘Cause, that would just explain everything.

Comments are closed.