Sears Automotive “repaired” my truck
and two weeks later it’s all screwed
up again—belts slipped from realigned
pullies, leaving my wife stuck in a foot of
heavy snow.
Of course, some might say, “Hey, now.
It’s your own fault, pal, getting your truck
repaired at a place known for overpriced
Kenmore appliances.” To which I answer,
“Oh, blow me.”
I was going to say something…but nevermind.
Jiffy Lube changed the oil on my old Subaru Legacy,
And when the engine seized on my way home,
I discovered that it was because they hadn’t used the proper
filter to replace the one they said I needed replaced.
Of course, someone might say, “What the fuck were you
doing having your oil changed at an oil changing place?”
To which I would respond, “It was right next door to
Quiznos, and I was hungry.”
Don’t worry Jeff, the asbestos that you probably picked up at a Sears Auto Center will make you forget all about mere slipped belts…oops, did I type that out loud?
True story.
When I was 16 years old, I didn’t even have a learner’s permit, but I did have an after-school job at Sears. In the menswear dept, because nothing said class like sansabelt slacks and members-only knockoffs. On day they were having a sale on brakes and tires in automotive and…viola! A new mechanic was born!
So if you lost your brakes and hit a tree, or had a tire blow out and caused a wreck anywhere in SE PA in the fall of 1986, I’m truly sorry. But to Sears automotive, I’d just like to say thanks for all of the free tools, I still have most of them. And thanks for doing a direct exchange on the four-way lug wrench that broke in 1996 when I was using it as a floor jack, even though it was clearly marked, Property of Sears Automotive center.
lying hakku:
yesterday I bought
a totally bitch’n fridge
down at jiffy-lube
lee–
I think we’ll just take it for granted that hakku indicates an egregious lie. As senryu is to haiku, so hakku to senryu.
Kenmore, ugh! We bought a freezer that died–died!–literally weeks after it was out of warranty. We successfully shamed Sears into giving us a better one.
Sears Automotive?
<runs screaming to the next thread>
Why that’s positively poetic!
Boy, this place has really gone downhill. When is Jeff coming back?
The sad fact is on most newer cars and trucks the diagram for crrectly threading a serpentine belt is in the engine compartment.
Instructions? You’re suggesting reading the instructions? What are you, some kind of ComSymp?
Regards,
Ric
I had a car that kept slipping its serpentine belt, must have had it replaced 5 times. Finally, one mechanic couldn’t do it from above, so he put the car on the lift. Aha! Turns out the problem was that the deflector plate that is supposed to protect the belt from water, snow, etc. thrown up from the road was bent out of position, so it was actually funneling stuff onto that pulley. Fixing that fixed everything.
Also, if you run a car without much road clearance into deep snow, snow can knock the belt off, sometimes by coming in through the grill.
huh, so in a related matter, is it wrong for me to flirt with the guy fixing my car at the local Firestone? (replaced the battery last week) and when he says that it sounds like there may be an exhaust leak should I beleive him, or does he just want to see me again?
I know a good mechanic in Northglenn, if you’re really in need of one.
Maggie. Unless the leak is big enough to change the sound of the exhast,you’ve go a new boyfriend.
Ric. The instructions are accompanied by a nice diagram. ‘Cause we all know mechanics can’t read.
So does this mean that we’re going to change the name of the Chicago skyscraper to “Goldstein’s Big-ol Fuckin’ Building?” </ronwhite>