From Michael at Innocent Bystanders:
Yoko Ono has been doing some deep thinking about how to make the world a better place.
John Lennon’s widow is calling for the anniversary of his death to become a day of worldwide healing.
In a full-page advertisement appearing Sunday in The New York Times, Yoko Ono urges readers to mark the anniversary by apologizing to those who have suffered because of violence and war.
Imagine. No religion, too. I mean, except for the Ballad of St. John and Yoko. You’ve got to destroy all of those hokum religious saints, who represented nothing but superstition masquerading as enlightenment, and replace them with pop-cultural ikons, who have real, true enlightenment.
Oh, yeah, and I guess Madonna had some television special. How’d that go?
Maybe a bunch of them could get together and try to levitate the Pentagon or something. That brought peace & luv to SE Asia tout suite, so I’m told by those unimpaired enough to remember…
If they can remember, they weren’t there.
Yoko Ono.
Ick.
Madonna was amazing.
I caught Madonna for .67 seconds while channel surfing.
I was horrified.
Oh, and it’s too bad John’s message of “give peace a chance” will be consumed by the audiance that least needs to hear it.
She remains a hugely strategic asset.
I think I’ll mark the anniversary by listening to “Hate, Kill, Destroy” by The Business over and over again.
Didn’t they learn anything from last time they tried this?
Won’t I ever learn not to ask questions that answer themselves?
Is it hot45 in here, or is it just me?
I’ll just sit here and wait for Yoko to make her trip to some hellhole cave in Western Pakistan to apologize to Osama and the kid doctor for the US opening up a big can of whup ass violence on him and his Taliban buddies.
It is possible that my motives are not as pure…
My most recent favorite was Yoko representing John’s vison while Imagine (imagine there’s no countries) blared out at the Winter Olympics opening flag ceremony.
Every so often, I am certain I see Yoko at the grocery store.
Imagine there’s no Yoko.
You want to make the world better Yoko? Barbituates. Lots of them.
No, don’t thank me, just doing my daily good deed.
Whose Line is old and tired but one of the single, funniest things that I have ever seen was Wayne Brady doing a song in the Yoko style complete big, fake gong and falsetto screeching.
Gasping for air, I was.
Oh, and I apologize for exhaling. Oops, did it again…
Of her own loss, Ono says: “I don’t know if I am ready yet to forgive the one who pulled the trigger. … But healing is what is urgently needed now in the world.”
Let’s see, you all need to promote world healing but I’m not ready… riiiight…
That’s true, if there was never any religion, especially in the post-enlightenment 20th century, then there would be no war, no sorrow.
I mean…except for maybe what Athestic Communists did under Stalin or Mao, or Ho Chi Mhin, or the Khmer Rouge, or the secular state of Nazi Germany. But dammnit, if not for that we’d have peace on Earth and no sorrow too.
“Imagine there’s no Yoko.”…It’s easy if you try.
Oh yes! Let’s all lay in bed in some hotel room for a few days.
Quit hogging the covers, would you?
Wait a minute. You mean Yoko isn’t the Warner Brother who wears pants?
[…]
Oh, that’s Yakko.
<turns up hearing aid>
I just wanted to confirm that Yoko still makes her loopy and vapid pronouncements with all earnestness and fervent, heartfelt caring from geosynchronous around NEPTUNE!
Just askin’…
Hey, MeGehee! Pry open the wallet and get a new battery, will ya?
MeGehee: Just for you: Wakko & Yakko sing:
<i>I am hum – man – ist – tee – yak!
all this misery makes me yack!
Now apologise to them
While I nosh a Chez Boheme
I’m hum – man – ist – tee – yak!
I am hum – man – ist – tee – yak!
I’m a sceeching, musty sack!
Oh, when it comes to war
I’m a camera hogging whore
I’m hum – man – ist – tee – yak!
Thank you, please remember to tip your waitresses…
“Imagine no possessions” Who do they think they’re kidding? He seemed like a nice enough guy but his intellect could have easily kept a balloon aloft well into the mesosphere. But I’m sure she’s using his great wealth for GOOD DEEDS, so it’s OK to have it. And ride limos. With footmen. And grooms. Lots and lots of grooms.
No shit, just no shit. “fiscal37” As in “Ms Ono we have these statements for you to go over regarding your fiscal health”. It’s enough to make an atheist screech “Jesus fucking Christ”. Almost.
Imagine if Hinkley had shot six inches to the left.