me: “So shouldn’t you be, like, writing yourself about now?”
unfinished screenplay:
me: “Isn’t that what writers always say happens once the momentum gets going?’
unfinished screenplay:
me:
unfinished screenplay:
me:
unfinished screenplay:
me: “I loathe you.”
unfinished screenplay: “Uh huh. Say, mind if I finish off the rest of these Golden Grahams?”
As an infrequent guest poster I say… let ‘im have the Golden Grahams. We need you back here, and less of us.
Amen, Major John.
Aw, Jeff, just put in a car chase. That oughta be good for seven, eight whole minutes.
Hey, fifteen car chases would make a whole two-hour movie!
Feed it whatever it wants. You can clean up the crumbs later.
Damn, McGehee, ya beat me to it! Lots of car chases. And a long slo-mo shot of a guy falling off a building, silently mouthing a scream. Also, flashbacks. You need a lot of flashbacks that won’t make sense to the audience until the end . . . and you can always write the part that makes sense of the flashbacks later.
Golden Grahams + chocolate milk = next best thing to the still-bubbling innards of the vanquished.
I’ve heard blogging excessively banishes writers block.
And going back to my comments on the Eva Longoria/ Salma Hayek thread, BOOBIES! Include lots and lots of boobies.
Jeff,
For the sake of humanity and all that is good, PLEASE FINISH THAT DAMN SCREENPLAY!!!
My work is done here……
Preferably, Scarlett Johansson boobies. Or, Kate Beckinsale boobies.
We’re all about the unsolicited helpful advice.
I vote for sandra Bullock boobies.
And knee or thigh high leather boots with short mini skirts.
Hey, I can’t always be getting you the ‘lanche trifecta (Insty, LGF & Malkin), mister!
Come back, Shane!
PS: They already did the car chases in Adaptation.
Karl —
Thanks for that. Great post. I admit to giving it a bit of a nudge, in terms of getting it noticed, but only because it deserved notice.
Congrats.
I prefer the “jet skirt”.
What about a form fitting leather outfit like Beckinsale’s in “Underworld”?
Jeff,
You’re also going to need a “montage”
As in . . . The hour’s approaching to give it your best
And you’ve got to reach your prime
That’s when you need to put yourself to the test
And show us the passage of time . . .
Even Rocky had a montage . . . .
Speaking of topics which take you away from this blog, I see that Pynchon has another book out. I’ve decided to forgo attempts of reading/understanding this one, and I’m just gonna bash my head against a wall. If I want to feel stupid – well – isn’t that what family is for?
One word: Ninjas.
Another thing you’ll need: some loose ends to ensure there’ll be a sequel. Sequels really do write themselves, y’know.
That explains a lot! Thanks!
Also: Ninjas in knee or thigh high leather boots with short mini skirts. Plus Billy Jack, or (if IP issues intrude) a Bill Jack-esque figure.
Kristanna Loken and Michelle Rodriguez (thanks, mojo)! That would make it a big hit!
Is it set in Denver? Does it involve people taking surveys of political opinions in the park?
OR, does it open with artsy black-and-white sequences of two people at a table in an outdoor cafe, sipping tea, exchanging “meaningful” but mysterious glances at each other, forgoing dialog. That’s it! Write in the sipping, the glances, and contextual street shots, and you can do without dialog altogether! And the glances can be in French!
T&T
Or you could use cowbell.
Never enough cowbell in movies.
yes, everything’s better with ninjas.
and pirates.
Why don’t you post an outline and we could each take a chapter and you’d be back to blogging full-time?