Merrick: “I AM NOT AN ANIMAL!”
Me: “Uh huh. Got a riddle for you, John. Why did the chicken cross the road?”
Merrick: “– I AM A HUMAN BEING!”
Me: “No, that’s not it. It’s because he saw you coming, and you totally grossed him out.”
Me: “I mean, so you’re a freak, so what? Does that mean instead of the same drool- and strawberry shake-coated burlap bag day after day you can’t throw a clean sack over your head from time to time?”
Me: “For Chrissakes, show some pride, man.”
Me: “Because trust me. It takes a lot to gross out a chicken.”
“Boy, I’ve heard of BO, but you could knock a buzzard off a shit wagon at fifty paces!”
SB: people
smelling people
Jeff, that’s nothing but lookism.
Be ashamed.
Bitch.
Chickens are creepy.
I saw a guy with no nose the other day.
Really. Just a crater, and you could see the front ridges of his sinuses.
Freaked me out for a while.
Michael Jackson is back in public?
No, Michael has a flat, collapsed nose. I mean NO nose, with a crater, like he decided to clear his nose with a big firecracker one day.
I have seen people so ugly that when they cried the tears rolled down the back of their head, but I would think that a person with no nose would top anything I have ever seen.
You’re one lucky dude, JAA>
So like, you;re saying that’s a bad idea?
[jumps up and runs outside to stop the neighbor kid from following my advice]
A coworker told me yesterday that farm raised tilapia are fed chicken feces. I wonder if that’s true.
Yeah, but wearing a plantation Colonel-style white suit with a funky bow tie while throwing out the meal is a great way to put them off their feed.
Oh. Oh, well.
At least now they’ll stay offa my lawn.
– Too late McGehee….. They decided to try it on the freeway where they’d have a bigger audience….
TW: Sinus conjestion – all gone!
Are you kidding me? A duck will eat the shit out of a chickens ass. They are the nastiest fucking birds imaginable short of a turkey buzzard. Which is a shame, because they’re so tasty Mandarin style.
The ducks that is, not the buzzards.