oatmeal: “For what it’s worth, breakfast used to be the most important meal of the day. Until they went and let the filthy bagels in, that is…”
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Recent Comments
- In The Mailbox: 02.28.23 (Afternoon Edition) : The Other McCain on Hey, longtime pw readers…
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Damned imperialist neocon carbohydrates!
Ah, the four food groups.
Good Times
Good times, indeed.
”The beer I had for breakfast tasted good. So I had another for dessert.”
I hear that Markos Zuniga’s more of a brunch man.
As long as it has a schmutz……
I BLAME THE HONEYDEWS!!!1!1!111one!
I mean, who eats a melon for breakfast anyway?
Bagels.
Nature’s most perfect food.
Made even more perfect with creamcheese….lotta creamcheese.
Goes pretty well with classical music.
I think Heff may have a couple melons every morning.
If bagel’s are so great how come Little Debbie don’t make them?
That’s because Seventh-Day Adventists have strange ideas about what’s “kosher.”
Criticism of bagels is typically veiled anti-Semitism. And I’ve always suspected I can’t cut a bagel right because I never trained as a mohel.
BECAUSE OF THE FORESKINS!
Mmmm, goatmeal!
Reminds me of hunting on a buddy’s farm down in Kentucky. We were up rattling around in the kitchen at o-dark-thirty when his dad came down, so my bud offered his dad some oatmeal. His dad, who had grown up as a poor black kid on a Kentucky hill farm during the depression, opined that he couldn’t eat “that mush” to this day.
So.. Enjoy your soul food! But remember, it’s your choice to eat that crap. Give me smoked salmon and champagne (it is Saturday).
– Only at PW, could you have a bris reference with your morning bagel.
TW: We are f.a.m.i.l.y, just you wait and see-hee….
Smoked salmon on a bagel with a big slice of summer tomato.
Scottish oats (stoneground or steelcut) with blueberries and raspberries
Regis likes one, Chuck Norris the other. Dick Cheney demands both be left in his hotel suite. With has some greek yogurt with honey and walnuts on the side.
BTE, that was definately served up at Dick Cheney’s bris.
If he’d had one, that is.
BTE, I meant BTW.
Caffine
Nicotine
Sugar
Alcohol
Occasionally cold pizza.
Is pita bread antisemetic?
I never understood that Zionist Jewbread. Lox and bagels? What’s that all about?
Now I’m hungry.
Yo, where’s my sammich, bitch?
TW: answer as in Get you own effin sammich!
– Hopefully his Rabbi didn’t use a 12 gauge….
– On the other hand Clinton’s Mohel was obviously left handed….
TW: life is just a bowl of nougat….
I’m always thrilled whenever I get up to Skokie, which has the best Jewish bakeries in the Midwest–if not the world. Big, warm bags of soft, fresh bagels of many kinds: plain., egg, onion, garlic, poppy seed, all of the above…smothered with lox or chive cheese. And bialys with poppy seeds–a bit firmer than bagels, but delicious. You’re right about that perfect slice of tomato. And a thin slice of fresh onion. And Nova lox, not Belly… And maybe a small bowl of chicken soup with a light, buttery matzoh ball on the side to wash it all down.
When I lived in San Francisco in the mid-eighties, I just knew that anyone who opened a restaurant featuring a really good bowl of matzoh ball soup and a good lox and bagel sandwich could really name their own ticket–there wasn’t a decent deli around for miles. (Wonder if that’s changed.)
Of course, there’s always oatmeal.
You make me want to come out of my coma and drive up there right now.
summer: it’s.
Call me old fashioned, but I like real salt bagels, the kind with the salt chunks so big you could have used them to deice your driveway… I mean what the hell, everybody’s blood pressure goes down in the end anyway, right?
GMG, I like those too, but the ring shape is kind of boring so I twist them into a kind of a butterfly shape.
Or I used to, until some bastard from Germany threatened to sue.
Bagels weren’t the least of it. Now poor old nativist oatmeal has to deal with Huevos rancheros, and the breakfast burrito.
Ack, eek, deport those pesky burritos and huevos, and build a big wall to keep them out. With lotso national guard troops on the border! American breakfast for Americans! Who’s with me?
STARCHIST!
SB: ready
to eat
But Mojo, Starchists don’t want tuna with good taste, they want tuna that tastes good!
– I’d litterily KILL for a coconut bar…its been 35 years… gawd where does the time go anyway….Oh well… theres always rugala in a pinch….
TW: Looking for a good Jooo-ish girl that doesn’t HAVE to have a Doctor type hubby…. wink wink
Wo-o-ah! there, Jim. Amnesty on the burros and huevos rancheros. Call it a guest breakfast program or something. Illegal aliens are another story.
And another thing, bagels are all well and good, but good grits and red-eye gravy will make even the most recalcitrant armadillo dance.
Don’t know why nobody’s thought of that.
tw: door
Okay, I know where it is…
My wife, Scottish Kate and I were just at Trader Joes.
Smoked Scottish solmon cost $5.00 for a friggin’ 4 ounce package!!!!
Btw, they do NOT carry Scott’s Porridge Oats.
Darn them. Darn them to perdition.
Oatmeal is clearly anti-semite. First they went after the bagels and no one said anything. Then they went after the lox and no one said anything. Next thing you know matzah ball soup gefilte fish are the enemy and that Quaker oatmeal dude is goose-stepping down Pennsylvania Avenue.
Hitler loved the oatmeal…what’s that tell ya?
As an aside, the Brits call sausages “bangers”.
My husband, Polish-Scots now resident in Canada, told me, “This is typical of you Americans. You’re so isolated, you think bagels are only Jewish, when really they’re Eastern European. My Catholic grandfather used to make them in his bakery!”
To which I, an Irish-German-English American, said, “Feh. Pass the oats, scottie boy.”
ahem, where are you now? I’m not too far from Skokie.
I’ve lived in heavily Jewish areas ever since returning to the US close to a decade ago. I don’t know how I’m going to survive if I move and there are no Jews where I move to.
I think bagels were concocted by 19th century European jews as revenge on their goyish oppressors. I mean, would you eat them if they were called by their true name: “dog biscuits”?
Jack,
I think you meant to say that we should blame the Honeydoooooooooooooooooooos!
Starchists don’t want tuna with good taste, they want tuna that tastes good!
Sorry, Charlie.
SB: consider
Phlebas