Me: “So tell me: how’d he do it?”
Karl Rove’s breakfast burrito: “Beg your pardon?”
Me: “How’d your boy avoid the indictment? For outing Plame and lying to the grand jury, like, five times?”
Karl Rove’s breakfast burrito: “I’m not following you.”
Me: “Well, did he have something on Fitzgerald?—like, you know, pictures of him diddling a hooker, or doing lines of blow off Jame Hamsher’s abs? Because I kept hearing his indictment was imminent. A foregone conclusion, almost.”
Karl Rove’s breakfast burrito: “I honestly have no idea what it is you’re talking about.”
Me: “Or maybe he’s a fink? Is that it? Because that’s the buzz today—that he flipped on Cheney and the President, and that he’s going to be Fitzgerald’s unimpeachable witness when the real scandal breaks, which will bring down this entire administration and propel Joseph Wilson to the White House.”
Karl Rove’s breakfast burrito: “If you say so.”
Me: “Of course, if he does that, he’s probably going to need to go into witness protection. Cheney’s no joke with a gun, you know.”
Karl Rove’s breakfast burrito: “So I’ve heard, yes.”
Me:
Karl Rove’s breakfast burrito:
Me: “Well…?”
Karl Rove’s breakfast burrito: “Well what? The official answer is that he’s innocent. And so he was naturally cleared of any wrongdoing. He is not the ‘leaker,’ and Ms Plame was never ‘outed’ in any official sense, except by her own husband.”
Me: “…Uh huh. And the unofficial answer…?”
Karl Rove’s breakfast burrito: “That’s to remain between Mr Rove, Mr Luskin, and the Prince of Darkness, I’m afraid—though rumor has it it involves the souls of John Cusack, Richard Belzer, and at least two of the Dixie Chicks. Of course, I can neither confirm nor deny any of this that at this time. But do be sure to check Jason Leopold in a day or two. Because if I know him, he’s gonna be on this Rove / Prince of Darkness thing like white on Howard Dean.”
As long as the two Dixie Chicks don’t include the fat one… that’s cool.
hehe – he said “like white on Robert Byrd”
riiiiiight
Wow, a burrito that can employ misdirection. The ones at my favorite taqueria only employ cilantro.
And they don’t sing.
Or ummm, you know talk.
Breathing quietly could be acceptable, with a noisy fan in the room.
Their fans are plenty noisy, all right, but I don’t understand why you’d want one of them in the room.
Yeah, well I heard that al-Zarqari is going to testify against Cheney. That’s what we need to finally bring down this administration!
Jay,
Thats why they bombed the Zark man. He was the leaker! Leave no trace. The only reason Bush went to Iraq was to pick up the Zark mans key to the White house bathroom.
How can Richard Belzer have any time to involve himself in? I mean he does read 650 newspapers a day……
WTF?
YOU CAN’T CENSOR MY EYES, GÖBBELSTEIN!
(The original was better.)
Did that burrito come with pretzels?
Jason Leopolds’ shopping list for today
Bacardi 151 (two litre)
Party Balloons (helium type)
Heavy Rope (6 feet)
Fancy Note Paper
Gold Ink Pen
Cancel phone and electric
When Jason finds out that Ron 151 is sold at most in 1.75L bottles. . .well, I saw Falling Down.
OK, Karl Rove versus George Washington.
Is it too awful to consider?
Satan’s gonna be pissed when he inspects the merchandise.
It’ll be like when Hillary sold him her soul. He gave her the cash and she was long gone before he finished dancing with glee and finally opened the lockbox.
All it contained was an IOU made out to George Soros.
OT, but I just can’t wait another minute for the “Interview with the Baloney and cheese sammich”.
Diana,
This is the best week ever!
I have to admit, today has been nearly as much fun as watching “Grizzly Bear Man” on the Discovery Channel. As Ron White said, “I laughed until I thought I would puke.”
Okay, enough of the George Washington links already. For some strange reason I feel compelled to watch it every time it gets posted. It makes me want to snort cocaine and bite wildlife in half. Enough!!!
:peter jackson
(five foot twenty
and he’s drinking for fun)
Jay …
I know! Makes me all tingly.
Is the breakfast burrito the thing with the beans?
‘Cause that wouldn’t be right somehow .
I have to admit, today has been nearly as much fun as watching “Grizzly Bear Man†on the Discovery Channel. As Ron White said, “I laughed until I thought I would puke.â€Â
That was a comedy?! Shit, I wish I had watched it now. Why don’t they tell you stuff like that when they advertise it for the preceding 6 goddamn weeks?!!
Well golly goodness sakes alive, and I hate George Bush!
Just what did you terrible people expect Mr. Fitzmas to do? You know how much pressure we feel around the Holidays!!!! Have you finished your Fitzmas shopping yet??? I thought not.
Laugh now, but when the seal indictment surfaces at Sea World, we’ll see who laughs last!!
And just why are you so mad at the seals??? It’s the chimps we hate. Rove does look a little walrus like, but truth be told, we in the lizzy community think he is H–O–T hot.
There, it’s out. Phew!!
P.S. It’s silly to talk to a burrito. Any common moron knows that it’s the refried beans that talk back.
Still nothing about this on the front page at truthout, though at the very top of the screen it says, “TO needs your help.”
That I believe.
“Still nothing about this on the front page at truthout, though at the very top of the screen it says, “TO needs your help.â€Â
That I believe.”
Why would Terrell Owens need your help?
He’s a multimillionaire, for pitys sake, playing a kids game!
How about Ditka against George Washington?
Now that’s a tough call.
Goldstein, the failed academic ,is such a loser that he can only talk to Rove’s junk food.
Besides Rove hates joos……. even the neocons.
5 handicap,
You ain’t making the first round of auditions.
The Neocon Trinity.
RR;
Goldstein, the paste eater ,is such a loser that he can only talk to Rove’s junk food.
I give 5 handicap a 34: the lyrics make no sense, the beat isn’t clear and he’s hard to dance to.
is it some kind of code?
I would tend to think the CFO of a maker of “railing systems” would be slightly more…um, literate? But I guess “5 hanidcap” proves otherwise.
I, on the other hand, prove that typing is a difficult and terrible thing…
Note to Dems:
When Pat Buchanan continuously made an ass of himself, we kicked him to the curb.
You made Dean chairman of your party.
There’s a lesson there. And it has nothing to do with Karl Rove.
P.S.: Buchanan doesn’t like breakfast burritos anyway–they’re too Mexican.
Hey, everybody, a Robin Roberts sighting!
Dudes..
Chill the F out.
sarcasm a mode of satirical wit depending for its effect on bitter, caustic, and often ironic language that is usually directed against an individual
Sorry I can’t measure up to the Mensa level some of you operate on.
I was defending conservative principals during Watergate and the Nixon Administration.
tw: issue —some of you mfer’s have issues.
I’m not going to ask it.
Why not? Inquiring minds wannna know!
No, that’s gross. You’re just being puerile.
Actually, I’m being scatalogical, but that’s besides the point. C’mon, the burrito is talking back???
It doesn’t mean we have to dive into that mud-puddle.
Ok, if you don’t ask him, I’ll tell everybody about the time you hit on that blue-haired chick at the Smell…
F()k you, whatever. (ahhem)
Uh, just exactly when did the burrito start talking back to you, Jeff. I mean, (jeez) my burrito takes at least 3 hours before it echoes in my briefs… (Christ, can I stop now?)
(Tee-hee-hee!) Yah, lame-o. That was better than Madeline Albright on a Feen-a-mint bender!
Nah, too easy…
Not just railings, mind you, but railing systems.
Whatever the fuck that means. Probably railings and the attachment hardware! See! They work together! They’re a system!
As much as my bowl of oatmeal and raisins, almost.
I mean, this is more like peanut butter and chocolate. Not just a candy bar, a confecton system.
LOL wishbone, I was getting kicked out of school by conservative principals during Watergate and Nixon. Seriously.
Hey Handicap,
If you are going to slam Jeff and the rest of us, you shouldn’t really be using your work email address.
That’s work email address system to you, Buckwheat.
yeah, i’m not convinced that’s actually the case, i mean, nobody is THAT stupid, right? maybe he’s trying to get someone else in trouble.
I wish the damned burrito would make up it’s mind. First it plays dumb. Then, later, all of a sudden it is full of answers and wisdom.
Indict the burrito!!!
Would one of you lawyers out there answer a question for me please, I just stumbled over this little gem:
My understanding has always been, if you don’t have enough evidence to indict, you don’t have any fucking evidence at all. Is that not correct?
Only if the guy you’re investigating is a ham sandwich. Apparently.