—Ooh, sorry. No can do. At least, not this week. Seems the little guy heard me talking about the exciting field of retail POS the other day and got so jazzed that he ran right off and signed himself up for some night courses at Foothills Community College. He starts this evening.
Which, who knows? Two, three years?—and he could be moving Royal A9155SC Electronic Cash Registers w/ Scanner and Epson DM-D110 Mono-Color Customer Pole Displays with the best of ‘em.
Besides, who am I to deny him his dream? Because I’m nothing if not a sucker for ambition.
I rather the little shit went for pole dancing, starting tonight. But the American Dream belongs to each of us, and not to each other. So drive on, little bro.
Just don’t make me show you how you screwed up my change even with a computer doing the math for you.
You know, I’ve been a reader of this website for a long time now – since before the pi, in fact. And I don’t think I’ve ever seen Mr. Arma-effing-dillo dance. I don’t believe he even can.
However.
For the sake of completeness.
I must admit that I have much less interest in seeing that State Mammal of Texas dance the boogalo than that woman in the Education Connection ad over on the right side of this page. She looks real good at dancin’.
If’n you know what I mean.
You might have to refresh the page a few times to get her to show up. She’s shy like that.
jdm – what did it for you?…. the nude feet?
I really thought he would have gone the bra-specialist route. You would think an an armored mammal would understand the need for support and the importance of not sagging.
This wikipedia entry actually explains a lot:
Well, BBH, they are nice feet… and nude, they are and all… but, I dunno, I think it’s those two youngsters. A guy could get them impression that she likes to dance. Horizontally, if you catch my drift.
Of course, she seem rather fer-tile… so perhaps just watching an armadillo get down might be safer.
YMMV.
jdm likes to hit on broads with kids ‘cause he knows they put out.
I can admire having a profile for your target female.
Enlighten the little dued and tell him to take the Sally Struthers’ courses and save a boatload of money. Not to mention feeding the morbidly obese. Sort of like seeing a Michael Moore movie.
Hey Ogilvie Goldstein! Rox 2 Astros 12!
Must have been good ol’ home cooked ‘dillo that got the ‘stros back on track.
Oh, and TCM aired the Bad News Bears tonight. Classic.
Tell us, Jeff, does the little fella also have a passion–A PASSION!–for books?
From what I’ve seen, that critter has a passion—PASSION!—for lady possums on roofies.
Armadillos do indeed smack themselves silly – and often flat – on the undercarriages of vehicles, by leaping straight up in the air when a car, or pickup truck, passes over them.
They are usually out in the road eating dead bugs, or trolling for some weekend fun, when they get flattened. So don’t be surprised if at the end of the semester you find the little fella has a few “incompletes” rather than straight “A” grades.
I once saw a perfectly square armadillo, flatter than a pancake, with each paw pointing out from one of his corners. He had a rather vexed look on his wafer-thin face.
Remind the little self-absorbed no-show that it’s been rumored he tastes like chicken. And I got plenty of bar-b-que sauce.
Know what I’m sayin’?
SB: art
culinary
labroate, pls.
Am I the only one who read that in the voice of Alex Trebek (as parodied by Will Ferrell)?
I’m beginning to think he’s really a turtle. He’s had weeks to show up and I’m still waiting.
Like my son putting the dishes in the dishwasher. It’ll happen. Someday. But I’m still waiting.
Please tell him that RFID is ‘the thing’ these days and that he should be looking into how to keep Wal-Mart safe from shrink, or for a big bank to track its server inventories for real-time billing. No money in mom-and-pops.
Unless it is a cruising technique, designed to suss out nubile gum-snappers of the sort whose propagation condemns the planet, sex them up Dillo-style and so spoil them for ordinary human males (thus ensuring eugenic bliss) under the pretext of door-to-door Bush41-confuser sales?
BECAUSE OF THE ANTI-MORONITY!
TW: You can
PS Forget what I said about the RFID. Barcodes are much more realistic for a corporate data center. Still, Fortune 1000 sales, man. Can shorty do corporate-stylie? (sp)
PPS You know, he seems to, uh, kinda cannonball from one mission to the next. Has he any long-term goals other than not contracting leprosy? (Which is curable in humans; I don’t know the prognosis for armadillos, kayn aynhoreh).
My point being, depending on what he considers success, he needs to start putting some time into it. College may be good for either possums or roofies, but uh who is paying tuition? Black funds? Of course if you told us, you would have to kill us (burdensome, that).
…Hey, I bet it was you all along. C’mon, people, now it’s really time to cough up! Baby needs a new pair of shoes? Naw, now it’s ‘dillo needs to pay for eight credits this term! And you can use it three or four times a year, including both summer sessions.
Having a big bill coming due for graduation this May ;>, I am not able myself to contribute, but send the thought that this place represents IP worth millions to the right people, and send my mental share of that.
(Since the thought is as the deed to leftists and other soi-disant members of the elect, let this be a lesson to actus, beetroot, et al: he/she/it/they should indeed contribute. If they can’t even send a kind word at pledge time, they are small, small creatures indeed, smaller than a ‘dillo. Fie on thee!)
TW: Those guys will say anything, won’t they?