From the AP:
Attorneys for television talk show host David Letterman want a judge to quash a restraining order granted to a Santa Fe woman who contends the celebrity used code words to show that he wanted to marry her and train her as his co-host.
A state judge granted a temporary restraining order to Colleen Nestler, who alleged in a request filed last Thursday that Letterman has forced her to go bankrupt and caused her “mental cruelty” and “sleep deprivation” since May 1994.
Nestler requested that Letterman, who tapes his show in New York, stay at least three yards away and not “think of me, and release me from his mental harassment and hammering.”
Wow. “Mental harassment”? “Hammering”? “Sleep deprivation”? “Mental cruelty”?
Letterman should thank his lucky stars Ms Nestler took this case up with a New Mexico judge and not, say, John McCain or Andrew Sullivan. Because it sure would be a pity to see the “Late Night” host faced with the prospects of being charged with torture.
****
(h/t Tom Elia)
Hmmm. Last night after Letterman, I walked around downtown buck naked and hit on every squirrel and stray cat I came across. And to think I blamed it on the tequila.
“Nestler requested that Letterman … stay at least three yards away”
Given that the woman clearly worships David, she more likely meant the restraining order to read: “stay within three yards of her person at all times.”
Here’s to betting he’ll happily stay at least 3 states away, restraining order or no.
Sully would only be all over it if she asked him to be smeared with fake menstrual blood.
Or wrapped in an Israeli flag.
So it’s Nestler, not Nesler.
She’s probably legit, then.
tw: Although, someone might have dropped a “t” somewhere along the line…
My nomination for understatement of the month.
How does Letterman keep attracting these crazies? Didn’t he also have a woman who came into his house a few times in the 80s or 90s?
tw: french
. . .
Yves Montand
Actually, it’s a fascinating question how she tried or might try to describe the conduct to a judge. How would she articulate what was at issue?
Did she actually ever meet Letterman or come into close proximity to him or was he doing this through the TV set?
I believe–and someone please correct me if I’m mistaken–that to get a restraining order enforced one has to have a hearing and present evidence that details how that person is actually a threat. The person against whom the restraining order is filed is usually summoned to attend. So is this a ploy to get in the same room with him?
You just can’t make this shit up.
What a dupe! Everybody KNOWS that Paul’s the one with all the magical powers.
And this judge is still employed? Imagine the telepathic “mental harassment and hammering” I’m sending to him about now. He’d probably justify a restraining order against me of at least six yards.
What, exactly, is the judge going to do six months from now, if the lady complains that Letterman has continued to “think of her”? Order a hearing? Call Letterman to testify?
Sheeze.
Aaaaahhhh. Reminds me of when I and my siblings were kids. “Mom! She’s looking at me!” “Dad! He’s breathing!” Mom! Dad! He’s not touching me!” “Mom! He’s on my side of the seat!”
This is just another instance of Karl Rove using his mind rays on some poor sap to win a bar bet.
Sometimes he uses Nancy Pelosi as his dummy, sometimes its Harry Reid, this time it happened to be Letterman.
All of this can be solved with a judicious use of tinfoil.
Remember folks, if you feel Karl Rove manipulating your mind, get some reynolds wrap stat.
Capiche cloudy, actus, piator et al?
You’ll be hearing from my make-believe lawyers again, Goldstein.
I followed the link, and Sean M. is… Sean Connery? Can…can such things be?
There are obviously two nuts in New Mexico, the woman and the judge who granted the temporary order.
For the first time in my life, I completely, utterly understand the frustration contained in the immortal words of Lionel Twain:
“IT! IT is confusing! Say your goddamn pronouns!”
Alone in the dark among his car collection, Jay Leno is wondering what he has to do to get his own crazy person…and dipshit judge to grant a restraining order.
Well, staring is sexual harrassment, dontcha know!
Hey, if someone reads your brainwaves without a warrant, is it admissible in court?
Why do I have this dark and sinister thought that Colleen Nestler has voted a straight Democratic ticket since 1992?
Nope. For real guffaws, Google ‘mandatory arrest law’ in conjunction with domestic violence and such.
This is America, not some place with a constitution or due process or presumption of innocence or anything …
What is missing is whether the poor lady’s brain was within the confines of the United States during the act, or had it drifted back to the home planet. We need to know that in order to determine if FISA or IMWA (Intergalactic Mind Weld Act) are the applicable statutes.
And don’t be to hard on the judge. I was born in New Mexico. It can be a big and lonely place. On lonely nights when you can’t find another lonely sheepherder to bang, you have to do something to keep busy.
Besides, I can kill you with my brain.
Jeff
Stop Thinking at me !!!
8
Robin,
Trust me.
Many, MANY more than just the Judge and Colleen.
The key here is the two words “Santa Fe.”
Think “Berkeley, with cows that are actually, y’know, bovine.” Santa Fe is a place where people will tell you, and seriously mean it, that the amethysts hanging from the rear-view mirror of their BMW SUV are there to provide holistic protection against the fuel injectors clogging. It pacifies the spirits of the dead dinosaurs.
Even that is better than Taos. Taos is where people go when they’re too weird for Santa Fe.
There are sane people in Albuquerque. Some of them have deep personal issues and firearms, but they don’t blame it on Mother Gaia. Others are perfectly ordinary Americans who do things like building walls out of used racing-car wheels.
I like New Mexico when I visit. But I’m glad I don’t live there.
Regards,
Ric
This is what happens when you don’t check your tinfoil hat for pinholes.
TW: ago, as in, “Not too long ago, someone like Nestler would have been put into a rubber room.”
I just wish we could go back to mandatory treatment for paranoid schizophrenia without inviting abuse of same. At present, the rules are, “if someone can say they don’t want to be treated, they cannot be forced to take their meds, or be held against their will.”
Which in practice means that people have a right to live in prisons of their own making.
I don’t know what the answer is, but it isn’t this.
Well, I’m screwed. I *do* live there.
And boy howdy, there’s something in the water that makes folks crabby in NM, especially the libs in Santa Fe. Dammit, there are those few times I have to shop at Whole Foods (doing a speed run up to Los Alamos and making a quick pitstop, dontchaknow?). Why? Short of mail order, there are just some things you can’t buy in this cursed state w/o going there. The creepiest part is how said aforementioned libs act like they own the joint and literally crash their shopping carts into yours in the process because they just have to get there first. “Out of my way, prole!”
Eegggghhh. Think I’ll have another beer.
tw: That’s just great…
This could be the first time the terms “David Letterman” and “Mental Powers” have been associated…
“…stay at least three yards away and not “think of me, and release me from [her] mental harassment and hammering.”
DAMN! I wish I could have worked that into my divorce decree.
Ah, yes. New Mexico. There is an imaginary line running East and West that bisects New Mexico into “Eastern California” and “Western Texas”. It runs generally through Roswell [Even Albuquerque is more “Cal” than “Tex”.
The base population is Navaho in “Eastern California” and Apache in “Western Texas”. Both groups spend considerable time laughing up their sleeves at the anglos.
I enjoy visiting “Western Texas”, but [even though the scenery is better] I just can’t force myself to go to “Eastern California” any more.
Lyndsey:
The person against whom the restraining order is filed is usually summoned to attend. So is this a ploy to get in the same room with him?
Actually, most of those who have restraining orders against them are not summoned to attend and many do not even find out that there is an order against them until they “violate” it, often at the request of the person getting it. A court recently found a woman innocent of any wrong doing after the contacted a man she took R.O. out on and then invited him to her house and had him arrested. ANY R.O. should go both ways.
I also suggest that if you have an order against you…do NOT believe it was dropped without an offical court order dropping it. Many have been set up by saying it was.
BTW, in most places, all a woman has to do is say I am afraid…. and she has one. Often this is done just before she plans on seeking a divorce and she is often assured she will get everything she wants from this “abusive man” MOST orders of protection are bogus and few have ever protected anyone. If someone intends to harm anothe, a piece of paper will not stop them.