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DEA warns Utah of stoned rabbits [Darleen Click]

Just think of the horrors of bunnies with munchies!

Utah is considering a bill that would allow patients with certain debilitating conditions to be treated with edible forms of marijuana. If the bill passes, the state’s wildlife may “cultivate a taste” for the plant, lose their fear of humans, and basically be high all the time. That’s according to testimony presented to a Utah Senate panel (time stamp 58:00) last week by an agent of the Drug Enforcement Administration.

“I deal in facts. I deal in science,” said special agent Matt Fairbanks, who’s been working in the state for a decade. He is member of the “marijuana eradication” team in Utah. Some of his colleagues in Georgia recently achieved notoriety by raiding a retiree’s garden and seizing a number of okra plants.[…]

Fairbanks said that at some illegal marijuana grow sites he saw “rabbits that had cultivated a taste for the marijuana. …” He continued: “One of them refused to leave us, and we took all the marijuana around him, but his natural instincts to run were somehow gone.”

h/t Emily Zanotti

13 Replies to “DEA warns Utah of stoned rabbits [Darleen Click]”

  1. John Bradley says:

    Sorry to go immediately OT (though I’m not sure what else there is to say about the dangers of stoned rabbits): this piece by Curt Schilling is pretty awesome, and somewhat reminiscent of the Fr*sch Affair.

  2. palaeomerus says:

    I saw someone use the term móropseudocracy. The USA is a móropseudocracy. We are ruled by idiotic lies.

  3. eCurmudgeon says:

    ” I *warned* you, but did you listen to me? Oh, no, you *knew*, didn’t you? Oh, it’s just a harmless little *bunny*, isn’t it?”

  4. McGehee says:

    High hares, high hares, to gnaw your stash we dares

    <sprightly whistling>

    High hares! High hares!

  5. mojo says:

    OT: Hey, hey – lookie here.

    Seems the Speaker (Mr. Boner) is intent on doing a deal with Nan and her freakazoid cohorts. UNEXPECTEDLY!

    I told ya. Don’t make that useless shitheel Speaker, I said, but noooooo…

  6. bgbear says:

    Oh yes, the childhood favorite by Beatrix Potter “Peter and Benjamin go to White Castle”.

  7. guinspen says:

    “Hop heads!”

    Doing The Bunny Hopa.

  8. guinspen says:

    For Originalists and other bitter clingers:

    The Bunny Hop

  9. happyfeet says:

    Matt is a very special agent indeed

  10. guinspen says:

    “The kids in Bristol are sharp as a pistol

    When they do the Slewfoot Stomp.”

  11. 11B40 says:

    Greetings:

    Did the DEA mention whether “stoned rabbits” are worse than those damn “silly rabbits” ???

Comments are closed.