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BREAKING:  White House Agrees to Let McCain Tie the Hands of Terrorist Interrogators

The good news is, while we’re doubled-over in gastrointestinal agony in the pre-death throes of Ricin poisoning, we can retch and vomit and soil our undies with blood and feces secure in the knowledge that no terrorist was degraded in his efforts to bring about our deaths.

And that makes Jesus happy.

****

previous torture discussions here, here, and here; also, John Cole slips into his hairshirt and argues the McCain side here.

28 Replies to “BREAKING:  White House Agrees to Let McCain Tie the Hands of Terrorist Interrogators”

  1. TallDave says:

    But… What Would Ramada Do?

  2. Dr. Phalaenopsis in a Time of Vandas says:

    How very sporting of our Vlasti. 

    -Spit-

    Dr. V

    tw: audience. Not much of a show if we actually

    give it our all.

  3. Allah says:

    Whenever I hear news of a terrorist attack, I find myself wondering, “Okay.  But how’s Khalid Sheikh Mohammed doing right now?”

    Thanks to the McCain Amendment, I know now that he’s doing just fine.

    Which makes this American sleep a whole lot more peacefully at night.

  4. Allah says:

    Incidentally, is anyone giving odds on whether Sullivan’s post about this will refer to America having now “reclaimed its soul” or somesuch other retarded, purply-prosed horseshit?  If so, I’m in for ten.

  5. TallDave says:

    As VDH puts it:

    But all that is precisely the risk we must take in supporting the McCain amendment — because it is a public reaffirmation of our country’s ideals. The United States can win this global war without employing torture. That we will not resort to what comes so naturally to Islamic terrorists also defines the nobility of our cause, reminding us that we need not and will not become anything like our enemies.

    Thus I am forced to conclude, much as it galls me to say it, that we should replace the interrogation manual with the Ramada Inn Employee Handbook.

  6. Allah says:

    Ah, he just posted.  “A huge step forward … for American honor.”

    Remember, per VDH: if we torture Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, we’re little better than people who fly airplanes into skyscrapers.

  7. McGehee says:

    So, if torture is now banned outright, according to McCain’s definition, does this mean no more comments from Dr. V de la V, Wadard, Jake (Not the Intelligent One), and Phentermine in a time of Rolaids?

  8. gail says:

    I sure hope Andrew Sullivan’s gob is going to be ok now.

  9. Brian says:

    Has anyone taken the time to consider the logical outcome of this legislation?

    Since “torture” is now defined subjectively, there is no reason to believe that we will ever gain useful intel from detainees.  I have always had my doubts about whether “coercive interrogation” techniques do anything other than extract lies, but those who believed in them now have no reason to expect that they can get useful information.

    Result?  There will not be any more prisoners taken.  Everyone dies on the battlefield.  Why take prisoners when the only thing they can be now is a liability?

  10. No, McGehee, it means that someone released from Gitmo will complain about being kept locked up, being fed by kaffir, and not having the ability to fully express his religion (ie, not being able to kill the kaffir around him) will say it was “torture”, and all the usual suspects will scream about American hypocrisy.

    What we’ve just done is signed a treaty with al’Qaeda: they may do as they please—kill whomever they want, in what ever way they desire, and we will treat them as if they’re lawful combatants carefully following the laws of war.

  11. Result?  There will not be any more prisoners taken.  Everyone dies on the battlefield.  Why take prisoners when the only thing they can be now is a liability?

    Won’t happen. Witness the furor over a Marine shooting a terrorist playing possum.

    What will happen is that a lot of our guys are going to get killed. Imagine what the mood will be in Gitmo when one of their seditionist volunteer lawyers lets them know the US will prosecute anyone treating them in a “degrading” manner.

    Fer crissake, did anyone read “The Cell”, the book about the 9/11 terrorist cell? While Mohammed Atta was in Germany, he went into a stomach-churning rage when he saw “Snow White and the Seven Dwarves”. The terrorists think that non-Muslims showing them anything but subservience is “degrading” to them.

  12. Another thing—the first uproar over Gitmo came when the pictures of the terrorists in orange jumpsuits, shackles and blindfolds were released. Anyone want to bet that’s declared “degrading”?

    Any bets on whether shaving the terrs will be called “degrading”?

    Feh.

  13. utron says:

    Wonderful.  Another outstanding piece of legislation, courtesy of Senator McCain.  I really wish McCain’s roster of bills made law were as insignificant and harmless as Kerry’s.

    T/W:  “Give,” as in ‘tis the season of giving.  Up, apparently.

  14. Fred says:

    Yeah, yeah.  But don’t you feel better now?

    And as long as we all feel better about ourselves, I’m quite certain we’ve taken a step forward in the war against Islamofascism.

    sick

  15. Cutler says:

    Unfortunately, I sorta lost it and left some choice words for his commentators at the bottom of his comments section. I think some of them would make good Red Coats, can’t ruin their pretty uniforms or break formation. This is really why military history should be taught in schools [as opposed to internments 101 and a-bomb 102], so people have a sense of perspective of how wars are actually fought.

  16. smithy says:

    I really question how objective McCain can be about this issue given his own experiences in Vietnamese POW.  I’m sure that was terrible, but it’s no reason for us to tie our hands behind our backs here.  The Vietnamese went too far with their methods, but that doesn’t mean that the United States would ever do the same.  Judicious use of torture is of great value in interrogation.  We throw it out at our own risk.  And I think it is simply ridiculous to have a former POW leading the fight against interrogation techniques.

  17. Cutler says:

    There’s actually another Congressman who was tortured at the Hanoi Hilton and who opposes McCain’s ammendment – the fact I can’t even find his name via Google says how much press he’s gotten. Still, you’re right, it is only another appeal to emotion and personal status, not reason.

  18. APF says:

    Does this mean no more Jessica Simpson Holiday Specials?

  19. APF says:

    Because that might be worth the whole blood-soaked feces thing.

  20. Defense Guy says:

    McCain is a national treasure.  It’s just too bad that the nation happens to be ours.

  21. Major John says:

    Brian, I think you are right.  We used to kid the “Special Friends” guys going out of our base that they could solve two problems for us at once: shoot more (we wouldn’t have so much trouble with ammo storage) and capture less (the detention facility was crowded and at the time we were feeding them packaged halal meals at about $13.75 a pop).  I sure hope that doesn’t go from a joke to a reality.  Dammitall.

  22. Major John says:

    Oh, and just remember the first thing Congress passes everytime it legislates something is the Law of Unintended Consequences.

  23. David R. Block says:

    I wouldn’t vote for McCain anyway, and yes, I vote in primary elections. This plus his “Free Speech Curtailment Act,” AKA McCain-Feingold absolutely guarantees that I will not be voting for him. McCain-Feingold was enough by itself. This merely seals the deal.

  24. TallDave says:

    That was a classic Major John, I gotta remember that.

  25. TallDave says:

    Allah,

    Remember, per VDH: if we torture Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, we’re little better than people who fly airplanes into skyscrapers.

    I think his point was that too many people will say we are little better, including quite a few here in America.  It sucks, it’s bullshit, it’s not fair, but there it is.

    P.S. Dude, bing back the photoshop love.  We’re all pining.

  26. Allah says:

    I think his point was that too many people will say we are little better, including quite a few here in America.

    Those people are going to say that anyway.

  27. Simon Oliver Lockwood says:

    The other ex-POW you’re thinking of is Rep. Sam Johnson (R-Texas).

  28. Rob B. says:

    Maybe McCain is doing this to get the over/under lower the next time we have a war because right now everyone bets the spread.

Comments are closed.