Me: “So tell me. Does he keep you on while he’s…y’know –â€Â
Tucker Carlson’s bowtie: “– Gettin’ some strange? ‘Fraid so.”
Tucker Carlson’s bowtie: “And the worst part? On the days he’s wearing his thong, he looks like some pasty wannabe Chippendale’s dancer who’s spent a few too many happy hours with his snout burried in the potato skins.”
Tucker Carlson’s bowtie: “I mean, if he can’t be embarrassed for himself, the least the sad fuck could do is think about me.”
Honestly. Was that even necessary?
Great. You’ll excuse me now. I have to go boil that image out of my brain.
With all the whining and sniveling, it’s gotta be a clip-on.
I prefer the term “gettin’ some stanky on his hangdown.”
“wannabe Chippendale’s dancer who’s spent a few too many happy hours with his snout burried in the potato skins.â€Â
Only four hours til Friday. Better get that snout out of the skins and get some coffee in him before we have a new lame excuse about cyanide poisoning.
Has anyone ever seen Tucker Carlson’s bowtie and Jeff Gannon’s cock, in the same place, at the same time. I’m just askin’………..
tw: turned
……as in Jeff’s cock may have turned Tucker’s bowtie.
The sad fact, for Tucker (which is sort of a pussy name to begin with, before you even start to consider the bow tie), is that more people will read to this post than will watch “The Situation w/Tucker Carlson, his pretentious bow-tie and some butch, lesbo-lib from Air America” later tonight on PMS/DNC/MSNBC.
Hmmm.
Strange as it may seem I actually enjoy watching Tucker Carlson’s tv shows. The problem I have is watching MSNBC.
Me: Yo, clip-on, meet strap-on.
JWebb: Yikes!
PVRWC,
Are you kidding? There’s more people TIVOing scrambled pr0n and freeze-framing the clear moments than watching Tucker Carlson on MSNBC.
sw: small. The bow tie, or … never mind, I don’t want to know.
Tucker Carlson’s bowtie: “It’s kinda like that SNL skit with Chris Farley and Patrick Swayze, only there ain’t no Swayze in the room, ya know what I’m saying?”
Tucker Carlson’s bowtie: “That’s when I wish I was a blindfold instead…”
tw – member. Eeeewwwww
Bow tie envy
Its got you by the throat.
TW “minutes” how long you can hold your breath.
…he looks like some pasty wannabe Chippendale’s dancer who’s spent a few too many happy hours with his snout buried in the potato skins.â€Â
Is that what the kids are calling it these days?
Mr. Bowtie is far more talkative than most inanimate objects interviewed here. Except for Mr. Bolton’s moustache, who after all has a reputation to protect.
On the other hand, Mr. Bowtie reveals too much information about Mr. Carlson, who I believe had a cameo in that steers & queers movie.
Regarding the preceding post, I keep forgetting that this software REMEMBERS MY PERSONAL INFORMATION. Else I wouldn’t normally attach my name to comments about steers & queers. Speaking of which, by the way, I have to recommend Iowahawk’s guest liveblogging of the Iraqi elections by Zarqawi today. The bit about the donkey bomb team was priceless, but you have to follow the link.
Sincerely,
Anonymous
Alright, then.
I’m with you ed. I find his new show witty and informative. While (Yeah while and not whilst) other folks may get a little sand in the …um…er…groin about it, I view it with the calm dispassion of Musashi. The bow tie may be an affectation, but it is no sillier than my affectation for thumping sticks. At least, he is aware of the joke. Loose your venom on Chris Matthews.
apple: What am I, now, chopped liver?
See, the reason why the strap-on or real question is important is this: if it’s a strap-on, it’s a silly affectation; if it’s real, it’s a showy affectation. He’s either a loser or he’s seeking admiration for learning how to tie the damn thing.
I mean, it’s not rocket science or anything, but I don’t know that many people who can do it.
You do seem a tad bitter towards nerds.
Why were you thrown off the AV squad?
Wow. So, if I’m reading you correctly here, I’m taking away from this that you really really dislike Tucker Carlson.
Me? I’m just sick of those Coke commercials with the damned polar bears. That, and polar bears & penguins don’t live in the same hemisphere. Just sayin’.
So, is Tucker gonna dance for us today?
It was a male polar bear. He just absolutely would not stop to ask for directions.
Sexist!
Besides, men don’t need directions. We’ll either find where we’re going or it’s not worth being there.
Sure, make fun of polar bears while their habitat is shrinking due to Bush’s Global Warming Initiative.
Think I’m kidding? Suck on my wintermint candy-cane of statistics here.
Doen’t anyone care that sea-ice is receding at a rate of 1/4 inch per century? Think about it. A polar bear is swimming after a strenuous day of hunting the dangerous and environomentally corrosive ringed seal, and he’s only saved enough energy to swim back to the ice float. But wait! It’s an extra hundredth of an inch away! That could mean the difference between life and death! Struggle proud Ursas Maritimus! You can make it.
Sadly some don’t. (moment of silence)
But we can make a difference in the lives of so many Nanooks if we just hang our wet dainties out on the clothes line instead of stabbing the Ice Bear with our dagger of greenhouse gases emitted by our fabric-softener-laden dryer steam.
If we just take a moment to think about how the bear feels, I’m sure we’ll all have an impact that will have them ripping the throats out of baby seals at a record pace again.
And my mama cried
Nanook, a-no-no
Nanook, a-no-no
Don’t be a naughty eskimo
Save your money, don’t go to the show
Corky and the Juice Pigs.
Only Gay Eskimo
Music, so turn it down.
Or maybe he’s a member of the Nation of Islam.
What?
Sean M.—Like Alex “Plus One” Sternberg used to be the only Jewish member of the Black Karate Federation? Hence the nickname: BKF “plus one”…