22 Replies to “A haiku that, for no reason whatsoever, imagines Abe Lincoln as a rebellious Yellow-billed cuckoo (Coccyzus americanus)”

1. Tom W. says:

   November 29, 2005 at 10:08 am

   I’m trying to write haiku using the subject lines from Chinese, Romanian, and Nigerian spam.

   To clean my sweets blast
   
   His give of flowering bier
   
   Some deform the young

   Tampon may crosscut
   
   In litigate must switchblade
   
   It hurt he how eight

2. Rick says:

   November 29, 2005 at 1:06 pm

   I noticed that the time stamp on this post said 2:49 in the blessed AM.  Jeff, the word on the side of the little silica gel packet in your pill bottle is “desiccant,” not “desiccan.”

   Rick

3. gail says:

   November 29, 2005 at 1:56 pm

   I don’t think Hugh Hewitt will understand this.

4. alppuccino says:

   November 29, 2005 at 2:14 pm

   Sir I have eaten ticks off of Ted Kennedy’s armor and you sir are no Ted Kennedy.

   ………..oh wait.  This isn’t the thread that imagines John Edwards as a tick bird?

   My apologies

5. Laurence Simon says:

   November 29, 2005 at 2:14 pm

   Better watch out, Jeff. I got hatemail when I started writing rude and mean adventures of Abraham Lincoln.

   Folks don’t want the memory of the man tarnished or something.

6. SarahW says:

   November 29, 2005 at 2:49 pm

   I learn more stuff from this blog…

   SW: Early bird gets the grub.

7. Alien Grey says:

   November 29, 2005 at 2:52 pm

   I always imagine Abe as The Roadrunner and Jeff Davis as Wile E Coyote.

8. me says:

   November 29, 2005 at 2:57 pm

   This post will certainly help establish insanity if you ever have to plead innocent to dressing up as big bird and stalking your neighbor.

9. mojo says:

   November 29, 2005 at 3:02 pm

   Mmmmmmm, grubs.

   I hear they make a nice pie…

   SB: since
   
   you asked

10. SarahW says:

    November 29, 2005 at 3:59 pm

    errr – “this” blog, means *your* blog, not the linked page… thought I should clarify given the recent spate of blog ho’s.

11. lost my cookies says:

    November 29, 2005 at 3:59 pm

    Lawrence,

    Too soon?

12. MisterPundit says:

    November 29, 2005 at 4:08 pm

    While surfing around, I happened upon this site. Check out this hillarious bit of revisionism on the part of French Prime Minister, Dominique de Villepin in an interview with CNN’s Amanpour :

    Amanpour: You know, many people, after hurricane Katrina struck the United States said, that it exposed the poverty and racism that exist in the United States. Many people in France said that … around the world said it. Many people also said that the riots in the ghettos if you like… in the suburbs …

    De Villepin: I am not sure you can call them riots. It’s very different from the situation you have known in 1992 in L.A. for example. You had at that time 54 people that died, and you had 2,000 people wounded. In France during the 2 weeks period of unrest, nobody died in France. So, I think you can’t compare this social unrest with any kind of riots.

    Amanpour: What do you call it then?

    De Villepin: Social unrest, you have to understand also, there were no guns in the streets. No adults; mostly young people between 12 and 20 … so it is very special movement.
    

    Got that? When people go batshit crazy and riot their asses off in France, it’s called social unrest. Anywhere else, it’s a riot.

    Who the fuck falls for this kind of bullshit?

13. wishbone says:

    November 29, 2005 at 4:11 pm

    This is JUST the hook I was looking for for my new Grub Fondue Set infomercial.

14. wishbone says:

    November 29, 2005 at 4:17 pm

    MisterPundit,

    Nice staff work for Villepin to just happen to have those stats on the LA situation.

    The whole 1940 surrender thing?  Temporary strategic adjustment.

    Dien Bien Phu? We just went out to the supermarket.

    Reign of Terror?  <i>Cutlery malfunction<i>.

15. MisterPundit says:

    November 29, 2005 at 5:04 pm

    If the French media and government’s reaction to the riots in France is anything to go by, it’s clear that they have decided to cling onto the illusion that it is somehow morally superior to everyone else, even if it means suspending all disbelief and living in a dream world to do it. Pretty much the left’s modus operandi these days.

16. mojo says:

    November 29, 2005 at 5:29 pm

    I think you guys are missing the truly amazing thing in Mr. De Villepin’s statement – for two whole weeks, nobody died in France!!

    SB: ask
    
    me about bull-based fertilizer

17. alppuccino says:

    November 29, 2005 at 5:31 pm

    ”……..and our Peugot sales are – shall we say – goeeeng like gangbustaires!”

18. Lew Clark says:

    November 29, 2005 at 6:22 pm

    I laughed, I cried, I reevaluated the meaning of life.  Jeff, I hope you copyrighted this.

19. Sticky B says:

    November 29, 2005 at 6:22 pm

    Free association is a muthafukka.

20. Jay says:

    November 29, 2005 at 6:38 pm

    How dare you sully the reputation of Abe Lincoln!!!

    While you were sitting around writing nonsense like this (and probably taking drugs), he was writing the Emancipation Proclamation and single-handedly holding the country together.

    Now, if it was Benjamin Harrison, that would be another story.

21. McGehee says:

    November 29, 2005 at 8:38 pm

    I see him more as a red-headed woodpecker.

    That whole “rail-splitter” thing. I don’t think cuckoos do much of anything, really. Except lay their eggs in other birds’ nests.

22. McGehee says:

    November 30, 2005 at 4:07 am

    …and live in German-made clocks…

Comments are closed.