The time will come, on the road trip of life, when you will be asked to cease your leisurely ride and join the timeless race of pumping pistons and testosterone—a point at which the rush of animal instinct is sure to surge inside your jeans and cause your buttocks to clench tightly like the fist of the Buddha.
And when this happens, it behooves you to remember that the rider who has never envisioned himself outside that race in the first place will feel no particular compulsion to join the frenzy now.
I was always inclined to attribute the surge and the clenched feeling to old shocks and a hard seat. But what do I know………
Butt-clenching (or “setting your heinie-binder to maximum tension” as they used to say in ‘Nam) happens when your speed through life isn’t matched to that corner coming up. But don’t expect one outside that timeless race to comprehend that.
Philistines.
There’s a race going on???
Hmmmm. Most of the guys I see on Motorcycles in this part of Kentuckiana don’t really have the fist of Buddah in their pants, but they do have the belly of the Buddah polishing the tank.
TW:looking as in I really wasn’t.
Belly of Buddah Polishing the Tank. Heh. I see the name of a new blog…
I’m sorry, what was Buddha’s frenzied fist supposed to be doing to my surge of animal instinct inside my jeans? And on a motorcyle? Wouldn’t that be, well, dangerous?
I’m confused…
TW: leave
Fine, be that way!
This story is an object lesson in why it is NEVER a good idea to order the HazMat omelette with chipotle coffee prior to going on a long motorcyle ride.
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