I haven’t been able to corroborate this just yet, but from what I’m hearing, there’s a good chance Natalee Holloway is in Miami, FL, dancing under the name “Krystal Champagne” at Big Mac’s Foxy Lady Lounge, 1800 Nw 79th St.
If anybody’d care to drop $600 into my tip jar, I’m happy to follow up on the lead. And if you could somehow figure out a way to give me that in singles, that’d be really helpful, too.
Developing…
Not a bad bit of conjecture, not bad at all.
But to be honest, a girl with her looks and youth would probably be dancing at either “Solid Gold” or “Pure Platinum” in Miami, a coke-addled slave to her new employers, the Russian Mob.
My God, man, a woman is dead here, and you are so callous as to …
… Hey, cool, leftover bagels in the breakroom! Gotta run.
If you go do tell Mercedes that I said hello.
Hey, what about “The Dollhouse”, near Orlando? Jeff’s gonna need a lot more than $600 to follow all these leads.
Isn’t Mercedes Chandra Levy’s stage name?
Wasn’t the Foxy Lady the place where Mohamad Atta and some of the other 9/11 conspirators spent their last nite? Now we have Natalee dancing there? Who is the Florida govenor who has done nothing to stop the spread of strip clubs in south Florida? Hmm? This whole mess reeks of Rovliburton.
No blonds for oil!
No g-strings for greed!
No hotties for Halliburton!
No pasties for petroleum!
No boobs for blood!
No lap dances for capitalists!
No private lap dances for Republicans!
I’ll need to get a gander at that thong before I start contributing any singles, Mr CITIZEN JOURNALIST!
…and here I was worried you’d get angry posts rebuking you for your callous insensitivity to the plight of poor Natalee and her parents resulting anguish.
Silly me.
Carry on.
Turing word “turned” as in, “This investigation will have turned a corner of the Citizen Journalist is funded to follow these important leads”.
(Where the *hell* is this stuff coming from?)
Hell, Jeff, why stick to Florida? Head on up to D.C. and check out Good Guys. Gorgeous dancers and, wait for it…..full nudidity. You could say you went to the Nation’s Capital for some sightseeing.
SW, “trouble.” Heh.
In singles?? tsk tsk tsk … you bad bad boy!
Wait a second….if you get an advance of $600, does your backer get the $1 million reward?
Well, no. But I can probably introduce you to a few of the girls…
Strippers, you say?
You may need assistance, they can be tricky. I’ll try and clear up some time on my schedule and meet you in Miami. If I’m late, go ahead on your own – but be extremely careful. Large accumulations of singles (not to mention, god forbid, sawbucks) can cause an unhealthy excitement in the breed, leading to lots of trouble.
Don’t pay for any college tuitions, for example.
Trust me.
Wait a minute, according to another independent investigator, http://www.thevalkyrie.com/clubhouse/events/clubs.htm “Solid Gold†and “Pure Platinum†are Florida establishments where “noticeably muscular dancers have been spotted.†I don’t remember Natalee Holloway being “noticeably muscular.” Who the hell is “CITIZEN JOURNALIST†anyway, an anonymous source? Have you learned nothing from Korangate?
Citizen journalist lied
strippers died.
You’ll need more than singles if you want a lap-dance. Or so I’ve heard.
AG is right—tens work pretty well, though for some reason twenties seem to work even better.
I’ll have to conduct more research on the matter.
And don’t forget there’s a two drink minimum.
And don’t buy the “champagne”.
And don’t ask how I know.
”…there’s a good chance Natalee Holloway is in Miami, FL, dancing under the name “Krystal Champagne†at Big Mac’s Foxy Lady Lounge, 1800 Nw 79th St. “
There is a better chance she is dead. And her parents are grieving their loss. Consider.
Shhhh. You’re gonna blow my chance to see strippers.