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I like them on my pizza, or with a nice Ranch dipping sauce

From the Guardian, “Headache sufferers flout new drug law”:

Patients who suffer from cluster headaches – a debilitating medical condition for which there is no cure – are flouting the government’s ban on magic mushrooms because they say the psychedelic fungi are the only thing to relieve the pain of their attacks.

In the past two years scores of British cluster headache sufferers have turned to magic mushrooms, prompted by reports from the US that suggest that LSD and psilocybin – the active ingredient of magic mushrooms – may be able to control the intensity and duration of their headaches.

Although some have experimented with psychedelics before, the majority have no history of drug taking. But many say they would rather risk jail than forgo a substance that lets them lead a normal life.

Well, if by “a normal life” one means having to do constant battle with the legion of tiny blue flesh-eating gnomes bent on keeping one from watching that Tivo-ed “Montel” marathon by throwing one’s wife’s flip flops and sandals at the TV screen, forcing one to respond forcefully and decisively by torching the little fuckers with a can of aerosal hairspray and a Zippo—which, yeah, that can really mess up your carpet, man.

…Sorry.  Was that out loud…?

****

(h/t TalkLeft)

14 Replies to “I like them on my pizza, or with a nice Ranch dipping sauce”

  1. tachyonshuggy says:

    Okay, I’ll grant that medical marijuana users can lead normal, productive lives.  But medical psilocybin users? 

    I can barely concentrate as it is.  I can’t imagine working while fending off the self-transforming machine elves.

  2. mojo says:

    It’s a matter of self-control and willpower, man. Ask Gordo Liddy – if you just ignore those screaming blue meanies, they’ll eventually get bored and go away.

    If only the purple cave bears were so reasonable…

    SB: how

    Ugh. Bowels no move.

  3. Murel Bailey says:

    Is there some medical condition that can be treated by making it with hot sixteen year olds? Not that I would do something so reprehensible, I’m just waiting for arguments supporting “medicinal fornication with partners below the age of consent.”

    There may be some valid medical claims hiding in all the noise, but seems like there’s an awful lot of bait-and-switch going on to provide cover for recreational drug usage, which does an injustice to possible real medical applications of some currently illegal and/or controlled substances.

  4. mojo says:

    You say “recreational drug use” like it’s a bad thing…

    Tell me why the Gubmint can tell me what chemicals it’s ok to put into my body again?

    Something about guns, but I was stoned, y’know? Missed most of it.

    Sorry.

  5. The Colossus says:

    Not to be confused, of course, with the Travelocity gnome, whom, if memory serves, you found to be delightful.

  6. eakawie says:

    Interesting, given that LSD was originally investigated as a headache cure, and other ergotamine compounds are used, I believe, to treat migraines.  But Psylocin/psylocybin is a pretty different animal, chemically speaking, IIRC.

    Well, it’s too bad that mushrooms aren’t easy to grow indoors, with instructions, kits and spores available for mail-order over the internet.

  7. Mojo,

    In the UK, if the government is paying your bills and putting food on your table, why can’t they tell you what chemicals you CAN’T put in your body?

    That’s the genius/problem with the welfare state.  If they are going to take care of the drug users, why should they tolerate the drug use?

  8. TallDave says:

    Yeah, I had a few ‘shroomer friends in college.  Never tried them myself, but apparently they’re very easy to grow, because some people I knew were chasing gnomes every day.

    I don’t know if they were the flesh-eating variety, but they did seem to adversely affect GPA.

  9. Demosophist says:

    Psilocybin is probably slightly less likely to produce debilitating inebriation than is alcohol, and a lot less likely than marajuana.  Whether it does diddly to get rid of cluster headaches is another matter, but being that it tends to turn the psychic or consciousness component of the universe into something pretty bouncy it’s not so far-fetched.  Unless “boing-boing” tends to amplify your headache, that is.

    Of course, I’m just guessing…

  10. Beck says:

    Murel: There was an Armenian billionaire named <a href=”http://www.softwaretimes.com/files/calouste gulbenkian.html”>Calouste Gulbenkian</a> (a.k.a. “Mr. Five Percent) whose doctor told him that to remain healthy in old age, he needed to have regular sexual intercourse with teenage girls.  For much of his life, then, he kept an underage mistress in Paris.

    That answer your question?

  11. MC says:

    Try Yopo.

  12. Desert Cat says:

    Bah!  I’ve never seen tiny blue flesh-eating gnomes.  Hellspawn threatening horrific death now, that’s another thing…

    Psilocybin affects the brain similarly to LSD.  The cluster/migraine headache cure side-effect has been known for some time.

    No, it’s quite impossible to grow them easily indoors with kits and spores readily available online.  Nope.  Nosiree!  Quite out of the question, really.

  13. Attila Girl says:

    OT (’cause it was LSD, not ‘shrooms):

    I was once watching A Hard Day’s Night in my old apartment in West L.A. It was circa 1986. I looked up at my roommate and a friend of his and asked, “Are you guys getting the same colors I am?”

    They burst out laughing, of course.

  14. billy big willy says:

    freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

    theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

    weeddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

    so i can smoke all of it

    peace out

Comments are closed.