Sunday, 9am – 11:45 am: Spent the morning staking out a Starbucks in Writer’s Square, Denver, hoping a minor celebrity might wander in and make a vicious anti-American remark over espresso and a bran muffin. Had my laptop and wireless card with me so that, in a pinch, I could write up a quick post, then email the particulars to Hewitt—a master at ginning up some real, honest-to-goodness A-list OUTRAGE. Unfortunately, the best I was able to come up with was FOX 31 News anchorman Ron Zappolo stomping his loafered feet and berating a pimply-faced Starbuck’s employee for what he called “the worst fucking cranberry biscotti I’ve ever eaten.” Too bad he didn’t bitch about a hot dog or a Chevy. Then we’d have had something.
But at least I tried. Which means this CITIZEN JOURNALIST can take the rest of the day off.
Hack.
That had better just be a REALLY REALLY RED type of apple, ‘cause it’s supposed to be “Mom & APPLE pie” that our soldiers are fighting for.
REAL Citizen-Journalists would know this.
PS: The Turing word made me do it.
You’re damn right, Drum. Probably some fancy type of flouncy gourmet liberal pie all those MSM elitists eat. Pomegranate with white grape and bleu cheese filling—some abomination like that.
Hack.
Pie at 8:32 am?
That can’t be healthy.
Heh. Indeed.
They actually make cranberry biscotti?
Now, I really am outraged!
You heard me, Hugh—CHARGE!
That does it, I’m going to have to launch a campaign to bring back th– sorry, let me start that over again.
BRING BACK THE CITIZEN JOURNALIST REPORT!!! I DEMAND THAT OTHERS PROVIDE ME WITH FREE ENTERTAINMENT!!!!!
I’ve been told that all the weekly slots are now filled. So, sucks for us.
But if you really want to hear a couple of bloggers snark on the news and then interview guests, try HOIST THE BLACK FLAG with Ace and Karol. Only on RIGHTALK RADIO!
Alternately, try PUNDIT REVIEW RADIO.
i thought pecan was the official pie of CITIZEN JOURNALISTS.
turing word: choice, as in, you mean i could have a choice of pie? something i’m not allergic to?
Apple, pecan, peach, blueberry, rhubarb… Just so long as it’s not something unmanly. Like strawberry. Which just stinks of the French.
If you were looking for a minor celebrity, you were in the wrong place. They are not at Writer’s Square – at least not this morning.
They are testifying in Santa Maria for Michael Jackson.
What do you mean you don’t get it? Minor celebrity … minor celebrity … get it?
Sheesh. Rita Cosby would have gotten it.
All the weekly radio slots are filled up? I’m calling b*llsh*t on that. Come on, it’s the net—I’ll bet if we fans just open our mouths (and wallets), the show will be back faster than (insert humorous metaphor here). Whaddaya say, all you fans—it’s a crazy idea, but just maybe crazy enough to work!
Nothing like the sound of an instalanche in the morning… pie? that ain’t pie …