When: Thursday, 3 PM EST
Where: Rightalk Radio
Guests: Ed Morrissey, from Captain’s Quarters, Kate McMillan, from small dead animals.
Topics: The state of political discourse; social cons vs. libertarians; current events; the Canadian scandal, about which I know precisely nothing. Other topics: nautical terms; moose; lager.
Toll-free Call-in number: 1-866-884-8255 (866-884-TALK)
Disclaimer: WE REFUSE TO BE SILENCED!
Offer: If you have any questions you’d like me to ask Ed or Kate, leave them in the comments. YOUR QUESTIONS ARE IMPORTANT TO US. DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK.
Summary plea: Your phone calls could very well save our lives. Please don’t hesitate to call in. 1-866-884-8255 (866-884-TALK)
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Only a few of you called last week. So we were forced to badger a perfectly fine young lady until she LOST HER SHIT on air. Don’t make us do that again.¹
The number is toll-free. Please, use it.
¹ if we did it in the first place. I’ve lost track. BECAUSE OF THE HYPOCRISY
Will you be doing one of your famous little skits this week? I know, tune in and find out.
(1) Has Ed ever really gotten bitten in the behind by another blogger? Or is that another example of Rathergate-level blogger lies?
(2) Is he afraid that because of his thwarting of the publication ban, Canada will pursue him with all of its military might? I.e., will he have to dodge some guy swinging a board with the new protruding rusty nail upgrade?
Is there really somebody named “Gomery” up there in Canada? I mean, really? Come on.
No way, man.
I called in last week and, near as I can discern, not one life was saved.
But I am honored to have played a small cameo part in what has become a ripple in the space/time contiuum of the blogosphere where the existentialist question of parody/not parody was never truly answered.
Or was it…?
Kate: Is it really true that the Americans are planning an invasion of Canada by e-mail? Do we have any defense at all? Is Newfoundland where we take our last stand?
Ed, are those nasty ruomors about you and the Cabin Boy true?
Just for your edification.
Is there really somebody named “Gomery†up there in Canada?….because that’s an adjective down here.
Kate: It’s well known you’re a Molson gal, but have you ever tried Moosehead Lager?
Molson is ok, but the Moose is sublime.
Huh. It was my understanding that Gomery was a noun. As in: SCOTUS two years ago struck down state laws outlawing Gomery as unconstitutional.
Asked for comment, Andrew Sullivan said, “That’s great news. I find Gomery gob-smackingly yummy!”
A question for Ed Morrissey: Why did you disband The Smiths ? I mean I know Johnny Marr split and all, but you couldve found another guitarist.. but where else are we going to find a lyricist that sings Oscar Wilde? You guys so rocked in the 80’s.. I’m just sayin…
AB: that’s because Ed knew that if he kept the rest of band around under the same name, then Smiths fans would still expect Marr-ish guitarwork. Eddie boy here didn’t want to remain the equal to a mere guitarist and so started a (very mixed) solo career. Curse Ed and his ego!
I do like “Suedehead” though. And “My Love Life”. heh
(All but Hawkins ignore:
—I am aware that that Morrissey’s name wasn’t Ed)
I’m thinking of calling in to suck up to Ed …
BECAUSE HE HAS NO HYPOCRISY …
other than a nautical nickname.
? for Kate:
Do you feel this is a real interview, or do you think it is another hoax? Please phrase your answer in the form of a question and a haiku.
> for Ed:
Did you think Cabin Boy was a realistic depiction of nautical life?
You might want to clarify with Ed & Kate exactly WHICH of the 30+ scandals our scandalous government has on the go that they wish to discuss. They both seem to have a pretty good handle on them all.
To combat any nervousness that may arise from speaking before of an audience of millions, I’m going to imagine that everyone listening is naked and very well hung.
Yes, discuss the 30 top scandals and the scandaling scandalers that scandaled them..
Why does Ed have to fear the Canadian government? I mean, dude is a Captain and all…
Oh, it has nothing to do with military service? Just a catchy nickname?
Nevermind…he’s screwed.
Even the females, Kate? Because I think the proper term for that is pendulous.
Concordia University. Someone please explain this festering pile of shit.
And Sharia Law in Ontario. Someone explain that festering pile of shit, too.
Kate must be thinking of me, Jeff.
Just me.
::spongg:: at the alarming images that produced.
SW: “spong” has gone missing.
Mynd you, møøse bites Kan be pretty nasti…
To combat any nervousness that may arise from speaking before of an audience of millions, I’m going to imagine that everyone listening is naked and very well hung.
Kate, you bad, bad girl.
But, goddamn, that was a funny headline about the Newfie armada.
Kate: Yes or no; gravy on your fries?
For that matter, yes or no, gravy in your fishing boat?
Ya see, gravy….boat….man, I kill me.
Spamword college, as in, “Ya have to be in college to get these jokes.”
One wonders if people will get it yet that the second interview is always a humor piece.
Unless that’s your mad plan, and this week it will be a straight interview.
The mind boggles.
Hey. You guys have some kind of show?
“Forcible Gomery” is a charge that adds another 20 years or so to the sentence if the prosecutor gets a conviction. “Consensual Gomery” is pretty much unheard of outside of the Georgia & Alabama legal systems.
TW – “possible”, as in “It’s possible that I’m making a joke here”.
Kate:
How can a country that produces such outstanding rock bands as SLOAN and HOT HOT HEAT, as well as the outstanding comedy of KIDS IN THE HALL and SCTV, be such a miserable failure at everything else? I’m not blaming you personally, I’m just asking.
Preston
Ya see, gravy….boat….man, I kill me.
Spamword college, as in, “Ya have to be in college to get these jokes.â€Â
No, you’re killing the rest of us as well, Craig.
As far as the rest of these questions, CRAP. What is wrong with you people?! These are all SMARTMOUTH JOKES. And we cannot DO JOKES.
Our very credibility is at stake.
Kate- what’s the deal with weird flavored chips up there?
As a Michigan resident, I sometimes think we should just invade Ontario, yes or no? Windsor has already abandoned you, and roots for the Detroit Red Wings as it is.
pssssst …. Carin ….. those are buffalo chips.
Kate, I don’t mind getting naked for you, but I just don’t know what you want me to hang.
Bill’s right – they can’t do jokes.
So they’ve got that awareness going for them.
Well, Bill does at any rate –
… speaking of rates, Kate – what’s the conversion rate doing to Canadian tourism along the border?
Kate – it turns out Canada’s press is less free than the American press – HA! … sucks to be you.
Capt. Ed – Any plans to travel on the ‘Maid of the Mist’ at Niagra Falls?
Any concerns if you do that you’ll be captured by an elite team of RCMPs and taken to a secret site in Moosejaw where they’ll have you drink Labatt’s Blue until you talk about your sources. And then feed you poutain until you shut up?
Capt. Ed – you’re less bat-shit crazy than the fellas at Powerline – yet they got blog of the year from Time – and there are three of them – hmmmm …. would you settle for a blurb on the cover of Newsweek?
Ed – Please describe your preferred method of accessorizing a hotdog?
Canadian-related question: Geddy Lee of Rush – why does he sing all high-pitched like that? Is it a hormonal thing, something related to a testicular injury, an affectation, or what?
Because I’m all about Canada’s contributions to the arts.
For Kate:
I clicked over to your home page and found that you have, like, artistic talent and stuff. Should I be resentful of this and seek to restrain it by implementing a social contract derived from a Rawlsian hypothetical veil of ignorance, or should I give a Randian shrug and hope that you end up oppressing all of us untalented slobs?
Also: I will probably be nude and abusing myself during the show. It’s simply a matter of percentages.
Capt. Ed – any relation to Capt. Crunch? If so, can you get me free Crunchberries?
mmmmmmm….Crunchberries.
Carin – forget it. Where the hell are 19-year olds in West Bloomfield going to drink if the US takes over Windsor?
Bill’s right – they can’t do jokes.
So they’ve got that awareness going for them.
YOUCH! Et tu, BumperStickerist?
No .. no, Bill .. you’re not allowed to.
Right—because of the integrity.
Jeremy, I see your point. Let’s not even get into what might happen to the Windsor Ballet.
Diana – It started with Vinegar chips</em) and then spread to <em>ketchup chips … I don’t even want to speculate where all this might lead.
spam word – “these”, and in all these chips are just wrong.
For the sake of RWN and his ilk, you’d better start the show by informing everyone that “The Great White North” segment on the old SCTV and the entire “Strange Brew” movie were fictional constructs.
Question for Kate: When your country is assimilated by it’s Borg-like southern neighbors, would the majority of your residents like to remain a single state, or would each province like to have it’s own statehood?
TW -“single”
Question for Ed: Where in hell do you find the time to have a full time job & crank out all the high quality & content blog posts you do, not to mention how much reading you must do to make said blog posts possible?
Question for Kate: As a Canadian, would you rather become the 51st state of the USA, or would you prefer American Protectorate status, like Puerto Rico, or perhaps Commonwealth status like the island of Saipan enjoys?
and dill pickle, chicken, sour cream and onion, “all dressed”, onion and garlic, barbeque, sea salt, jalapeno… you name it we got it, when it comes to potato chips.
When it comes to health care, however, the only flavour is “Cuban”.
For Ed: Obviously the Canadian scandal/Gomery thingamabob is important, so can you explain the gist of it in 60 seconds or less to us rubes who haven’t been following along?
Followup: You’re becoming a hero in Canada, yet you could be jailed for going there. How weird is that? Big party planned in International Falls with your newfound Canadian chums?
—
For Kate: Quebec separation – good thing or not? Isn’t in inevitable at some point?
Followup: wouldn’t it be nice to have everything at the grocery store printed in just ONE language?
“To combat any nervousness that may arise from speaking before of an audience of millions, I’m going to imagine that everyone listening is naked and very well hung.”—Kate
Kate: and we’ll be imagining that you’re the current “Say Anything” advert girl; dressed in exactly the same attire. Just to keep us from being nervous while listening, of course.
BLT, Actually I’ve heard that is what she will be wearing.
Have no fear, Kate won’t be wearing anything under her white sheets with the pointy hat.
“Canada needs institutions to lock up Aboriginal Activists and Apologists” – Kate McMillan, Western Standard
“Canada needs to recreate residential schools for Aboriginal Children” – Kate McMillan Small Dead Animals
Isn’t she sweet?
The libelous statements above were provided by Meaghan Walker Williams, a self-described internet Indian “activist”. If you spot her whereabouts, please call -her doctor.
Actually, after she posted the above, I tracked her down, lured her close with the promise of a brand new Billy Jack DVD box set, then killed her with a smallpox blanket I bought off eBay from somebody named “BYRDmeister.”