I am most certainly not afraid of Christians. In fact, I learned a long time ago that I could smack Christians around at will and take their wallets, and all they’d do in response is turn the other cheek and say a prayer for me.
The pious dopes.*
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update: AND NO, I DON’T NEED ANY AMWAY ALL-PURPOSE LIQUID CLEANER!
Goyim are funny.
Don’t make me go all CRUSADER on you now. When push comes to shove, we can still do the “eye for an eye” thing.
The ones who turn the other cheek are good Christians. Us bad Christians will still kick your ass. Just so you know.
Great idea for a comic book. “The Badassss Christian”. Where is Flannery O’Connor when you need her…
You need to try that wallet-swiping bit on a Christian Crusader sometime.
You’ll be handed your head on a silver platter.
I AM A CHRISTOPHOBE!
I fear being wrapped in some pastel fabric.
Christo sucks. Those stupid orange gates.
What?
Really kickass Christians will pretend to be Bible salesmen and steal your artificial leg while you’re asleep.
Manley Pointer?
I’m especially afraid of those Christian ladies in Ford Explorers. They’ll run you over as soon as look at you
Goodman and Daniels did a fine job in Christophobia, but the speciall effects were pretty weak.
Good one Jeff.
My word is Zipper, as in Manly Pointer containment device.
AND NO, I DON’T NEED ANY AMWAY ALL-PURPOSE LIQUID CLEANER!
Well, then, how about a nice ham sandwich and a glass of milk?
Let’s see you try that shit with Cardinal Ximenez, frat-boy. You’ll see what an auto-da-fe looks like, close up and personal…
As your MASTER, I bid you repent.
You good country people need to read more Flannery O’Connor.
Well, is it okay for us Christians to be afraid of you? I mean, not so much due to your religious heritage, but more so because of your sense of humor.
Let’s face it, a mind that can come up with the stuff you publish is more than capable of being a supervillian. I fear the only thing that is saving us from your wrath is a cool villian name.
No thank you< I already have one. Also a collection of artificial legs.
I have to somewhat echo Brian J – I read that first as “Christophe” and was wondering who called you an artist.
But if you do fear me, I’ll understand.
I’ll be sending the LDS missionaries over for a little chat—that ought to get you shaking in yer boots!
Swen, The reason they’re so scary is that they always dress like undertakers. Black pants, white shirt, black tie. Give me a Jehovah’s Witness any day. Especially one with a big fancy church hat.
Try not to be too hard on HundredPercenter; we just celebrated the murder of our lord and savior and, to complete the Schiavo as Jesus analogy, we need some one to take it out on. HP figured any Jew would do.
I AM THE BEAST! TREMBLE BEFORE ME!
You don’t have to smack me around Jeff. I will gladly give you my wallet for ham and shellfish.
Dear Beast, I know which one you are but who’s the chick?
Boobies!
I thought those was chigger bites.
Who’s Chigger?
Is jeff’s real name Chigger?
*noting dusty brand model*
And my comment was going to be???
I wish I had something amusing to add, but the Sons of Abraham take all the best jokes.
Tim McNabb
fivehundredwords.com
Wouldn’t a phobia of Christians be Christianophobia? Christophobe sounds like you’re scared of Jesus.
I mean, come on, if you’re going to use fake words they should at least make sense.
Later,
bbeck
Christianophobia is a bit cumbersome. You could shorten it to Xianophobia, but the it would sound like you were afraid of some Chinese guy.
By the way- My AMWAY business is fucking booming and I need someone help me with door to door sales.
Jeff- in between your muggings, perhaps you can come work for me to make an honest days pay.
Considering that jewish white males do not make many friends in prison- you may want to take me up on my pious offer