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“His moistened eyes ablaze / with fiery indignation—he shone! / a short man among taller men / none more ‘concerned’ than was he”

Are you a budding Tom Daschle-inspired poet?  If so, submit your work here.

35 Replies to ““His moistened eyes ablaze / with fiery indignation—he shone! / a short man among taller men / none more ‘concerned’ than was he””

  1. JWebb says:

    Soft spoken poseur

    and choking obstructionist

    Heimliched by the vote

  2. Sean M. says:

    You know, I went over to Sondra K’s blog, and I sat there for a few minutes, staring at my keyboard, before coming to the realization that Tom Daschle just doesn’t inspire my poetic side.

    Go figure.

  3. gail says:

    Hughes Mearns’s “The Little Man”

    As I was walking up the stair

    I met a man who wasn’t there;

    He wasn’t there again today.

    I wish, I wish he’d stay away.

  4. Jeff Goldstein says:

    He inspires me to show concern.  Concern.

  5. Tom Daschle just doesn’t inspire my poetic side

    Oh hey!  I peeled off a haiku and a limerick off the top of my head!  Though I doubt I’ll return to this particular theme in my future creations…

  6. McGehee says:

    There once was a Democrat named Daschle

    Whose definition of partisanship was faschle

    He was sure all the blight

    Must be coming from the right

    But really, he was just being an aschle.

  7. gail says:

    Bravo McGehee! The scansion needs a bit of work, but the rhymes are Byronic.

  8. Sobek says:

    …a short man among taller men…

    Hard to argue with that.

  9. gail says:

    My favorite Byronic stanza:

    Her favourite science was the mathematical,

    Her noblest virtue was her magnanimity,

    Her wit (she sometimes tried at wit) was Attic all,

    Her serious sayings darken’d to sublimity;

    In short, in all things she was fairly what I call

    A prodigy—her morning dress was dimity,

    Her evening silk, or, in the summer, muslin,

    And other stuffs, with which I won’t stay puzzling.

  10. gail says:

    OK Here’s the best I can do without really working:

    Adieu to Mr. Daschle

    His favourite pursuit was the political,

    His noblest virtue was his consternation,

    His partisan devotion was fanatical,

    His wife’s finances caused some perturbation;

    Quite short he was, and often spoke in what I call

    A monotone—his speeches to the nation

    Left much to be rhetorically desired.

    And none too soon it was that he retired.

  11. Ana says:

    Okay. So that would make Gail the smart Angel, Sabrina. If Diana will agree to be the street smart angel Kelly then I can be (of course) the atletic Farrah Fawcet nut–Jill.

    This is better than the friggin’ wonder twins and their monkey–Gleek(?). Let’s go fight crime in tight pants!

    Go next door. All will be revealed.

    Okay. Not ALL.

  12. steve miller says:

    Poor Tom Daschle lost.

    Now Dakota’s a “Red State”;

    Query: North or South?

  13. kelly says:

    Uh, JayDub, better check the syllabic count on line two.

    (Gail, was going to catch it anyway.)

  14. gail says:

    You mean “And choking obstructionist”? It’s fine if you pronounce “tion” as “shun”

  15. Matt says:

    They came together, proudly, fiercely

    (Anger seething, eyes welled up),

    To honor the man who bravely led them

    Into failure.

  16. JWebb says:

    Thank you, Gail. And kelly, I suggest “Hooked on Phonics.” With all due respect.

  17. claudette says:

    It was a dark and stormy night

    Short and tall in the rain

    The wind became so strong

    It blew the brown dog of it’s chain

  18. skinbad says:

    This time, bogus votes

    from the reservation were

    not worth one red cent.

  19. G. of T. Dylan says:

    Bleed! Bleed with the drying of the eyes

    Upon the soft shore of indiscriminate wharfs,

    Whose blind-eye-pilings

    Dwarf the dregs of the lands end roarings.

  20. CraigC says:

    Hey, Ana, funny you should mention Gail and Diana. I was talking to Gail, and she said she thought you guys were the Three Musketettes of PW.  I said that there must be a musk joke in there somewhere, but outside the confines of PW, I felt strangely ooky about looking for it.

    Anyway, here’s my favorite poem:

    (I think I may have mentioned this here before) cheese

    CRANK IT UP REALLY LOUD!!!!

    Ridin’ down the highway

    Goin’ to a show

    Stop in all the by-ways

    Playin’ rock ‘n’ roll

    Gettin’ robbed

    Gettin’ stoned

    Gettin’ beat up

    Broken boned

    Gettin’ had

    Gettin’ took

    I tell you fooks

    It’s harder than it looks

    It’s a long way to the top

    If you wanna rock ‘n’ roll

    It’s a long way to the top

    If you wanna rock ‘n’ roll

    If you think it’s easy doin’ one night stands

    Try playin’ in a rock roll band

    It’s a long way to the top

    If you wanna rock ‘n’ roll

    Hotel, motel

    Make you wanna cry

    Lady do the hard sell

    Know the reason why

    Gettin’ old

    Gettin’ grey

    Gettin’ ripped off

    Under-paid

    Gettin’ sold

    Second hand

    That’s how it goes

    Playin’ in a band

    It’s a long way to the top

    If you wanna rock ‘n’ roll

    It’s a long way to the top

    If you wanna rock ‘n’ roll

    If you wanna be a star of stage and screen

    Look out it’s rough and mean

    It’s a long way to the top

    If you wanna rock ‘n’ roll

    It’s a long way to the top

    If you wanna rock ‘n’ roll

    It’s a long way to the top

    If you wanna rock ‘n’ roll

    It’s a long way to the top

    If you wanna rock ‘n’ roll

    Well, it’s a long way

    It’s a long way, (they tell me)

    It’s a long way, such a long way

  21. CraigC says:

    Miss you, Bon.

  22. CraigC says:

    And Sean, speaking of Miss Sondra, she told me the meaning of life recently. One night when I was about seventeen, I was tripping my brains out in my parents’ living room, and I discovered the meaning of life, but I couldn’t remember it later.  Oh, well.  Anyway, THE MEANING OF LIFE, by SondraK.  You guys ready?  (You girls know this already)

    Pussy trumps everything.

    There ya go.

  23. Sean M. says:

    So I guess pussy = 42?

  24. CraigC, include boobs and you got it.

    You men.

  25. Master of None says:

    Boobs?  Eh, if you seen one, you’ve seen them both.

  26. Alpha Baboon says:

    So who’s playing Kris Monroe, Jill’s little sister?

  27. iowahawk says:

    Like Captain Eleven

    On KELO-TV

    CBS Sioux Falls

    He had the Wisdom of Solomon

    And the Strength of Atlas

    And Popeye cartoons for all

    You, Tom Daschle

    Are Captain Eleven

    /extreme_midwest_inside_joke

  28. iowahawk says:

    And in case anyone is interested in extreme midwest inside jokes…

    http://www.sd4history.com/Unit9/captian11.htm

  29. CraigC says:

    Speaking of pussy, and we were, I wonder what this guy was feeding kitty.  Or maybe the catbox really needed cleaning.  Cats hate that, you know.

  30. CraigC says:

    In D.C., we had Cap’n Tugg on Channel 5. Who outranks who between a Cap’n and a Captain?

  31. McGehee says:

    Craig, that was just a catnip deal gone bad.

  32. gail says:

    Anybody grow up in Cincinnati? We had Uncle Al and his sidekick wife, Captain Windy. Really. Uncle Al was a private pilot who took a couple of my friends from middle school for a ride when they met him at the airport. He caused the plane to drop precipitously to give the kids a thrill and, according to them, said “How do you like that, girls? Dry sex.”

  33. CraigC says:

    Your friends didn’t know that any guy named “Uncle Al” is probably a weenie-wagger?

  34. gail says:

    We barely knew what a weenie was back then.

  35. Dougrc says:

    short

    such a small word

    insignificant

    negligible

    powerless

    without height

    such is Daschle

    short

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