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“You are a little bastard…You stole an instalanche, plain and simple.”

As a show of solidarity for silenced 13-year-old blogger Austin (of Ponderings of a Political Teen), protein wisdom will remain dark for the rest of the morning. 

At least, y’know, until I shower and get back from Best Buy.

Remember:  You can silence our blogs, but YOU CANNOT TAKE OUR FREEDOM!*

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©THE ALLIANCE OF CITIZEN JOURNALISTS

****

update:  FREE AUSTIN T-SHIRTS© now available thru my Cafe Press store.*

Austin image used without permission

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update 2:  The story comes to an end.

54 Replies to ““You are a little bastard…You stole an instalanche, plain and simple.””

  1. Hubris says:

    Maybe someone could create a “Free Austin” shirt on CafePress and use the proceeds to buy Golson an Instalanche.*

    *This is my idea, so I expect a cut, you little bastards.

  2. Grisha says:

    Yes! You make the t-shirts, I’ll make the giant puppets! When can we start rallies?

  3. TomB says:

    Going to Best Buy Jeff?

    How ‘bout getting me some batteries?

    and maybe a TV.

    yea, a freakin’ BIG TV.

    Hey, anybody else need anything???

  4. stower says:

    First Dan Rather, now 13 year old boys!

    No one is safe from the wrath of the blogger! Fear them, fear them all!!!

  5. shank says:

    Maybe someone could create a “Free Austin” shirt on CafePress and use the proceeds to buy Golson an Instalanche.

    Or a bigger dick, so that he doesn’t have to stomp around the blogosphere pushing around teens for chrissake.

  6. Jeff Goldstein says:

    FREE AUSTIN T-SHIRTS NOW AVAILABLE THRU CAFE PRESS.  IDEA COMPLIMENTS OF HUBRIS

  7. TomB says:

    Yes! You make the t-shirts, I’ll make the giant puppets! When can we start rallies?

    Geez, if we’re going to have a rally with puppets, I better stop showering now…

    Anybody have any patchouli?

  8. Fred says:

    Free tee-shirts!?!?

    Sa-weet!

    I am so there.  In addition to stealing people’s precious bandwidth by “deep and hot” linking, I enjoy getting free stuff.

  9. Joe says:

    “stole an Instalanche” !?! What a pathetic, whiny, envious little twerp this dipshit Golson is. And hey, Margolis – way to promote your site, duuuude. Fighting with kids over a toy – excuse me, a picture of a toy ! Maybe later you could get Golson to beat up some teenage girls ! Man, that would be so cool ! Just make sure you get the credit – you must be so proud.

  10. Lyndsey says:

    Sheesh, how old are these people?!  Do they have lives in the real world?

  11. Tman says:

    “Stole My Instalanche”??

    Are freaking kidding me? Is an Instalanche suddenly a commodity? Should we all get stock in Instalanche or something now?

    I used to wonder if Allah was being to general when saying the blogosphere had turned in to a “who has the biggest dick” contest but seeing stuff like this makes me wonder.

    “Stealing an instalanche”…….(shaking head)…

  12. Howard says:

    Okay, the story about terrorism jumping the shark has now itself jumped the shark.  The internet is imploding!  Get out while you can!

    And the original meme of terrorism jumping the shark was someone else’s, whose I can’t remember, so I give no credit.  So there.

  13. SarahW says:

    “blogosphere had turned in to a “who has the biggest dick” contest”

    I wish folks would stop talking about that Wonkette person.

  14. Allah says:

    I used to wonder if Allah was being to general when saying the blogosphere had turned in to a “who has the biggest dick” contest

    Berating a 13-year-old over an Instalanche is, admittedly, an extreme example.  A more typical case would be the bloggers driving the Eason Jordan story; one suspects they already have their tape measures out.  If it story breaks big, expect to see Hugh Hewitt, pants around the ankles, approaching random women in the street asking them to tell him “how big it is.”

  15. swimdad says:

    What is HumdredPercenter getting… a Proteinwisdomlanche?  A Goldsteinlanche?

    swimdad, thinking big

  16. Fred says:

    Allah:

    Geraghty, over at “tks” on NRO, must also be assumed to be roaming the streets wearing nothing but a trenchcoat, some dark glasses and a smile, should this whole CNN-Eason Jordan thing break big.

    Not that that would be bad.  The Eason Jordan thing, I mean.  Not Geraghty in a trenchcoat.

    Clear?

    Now, where’s my photoshop?

    Un-gratefully Yours,

    Fred

  17. Hey Allah –

    What are the odd chances that maybe Geraghty, et al, are actually pissed at Jordan and want to hold him accountable for saying some incredibly damaging accusations about US soldiers?

    I may not be in on the torch bearing crowd, but I’m also not pissing on their effort.

    I’d be careful about boiling everything down to that bitter (though sometimes accurate) dick narrative you got going there.

  18. Allah says:

    Fred—Indeed, seeing Eason Jordan fry for what he said at Davos would more than justify a little blog cock-flapping.  What I can’t figure out, though, is why, if we’re all part of some media revolution that’s making the MSM irrelevant, Hewitt and Geraghty et al. care so much that the MSM isn’t covering this.  We’re covering it, aren’t we?  Glenn’s covering it.  If we’re all such hot shit, let’s see what we can do on this one without handing it off to the big boys at Fox News.

  19. Allah says:

    Bill—See my response to Fred.

  20. BumperStickerist says:

    Allah’s got some of post cock, ergo propter cock thing going that I won’t touch with my 10” pole.

  21. Allah says:

    BS-Legend has it that the inspiration for Hewitt’s book came to him in a vision.  He was walking along when he looked to the sky and saw the Blogspot symbol, as bright as a thousand suns.  And then the voice of God: “In Cock Signo Vinces.”

    So it was written, so it shall be done.

  22. Maybe I can get Glenn to co-author with me a law review article on whether or not an “instalanche” is something in which one can have a property interest.

    Hmmm, time for an email to Glenn.

  23. Hubris says:

    By the by, anyone who has used the term “Instalanche” in the course of this discussion owes $.25 to Jim Treacher.

  24. BumperStickerist says:

    So it was written, so it shall be done.

    Take Hugh and bathe him, and bring him to Allah’s tent.

  25. Fred says:

    To ask the questions, Allah, is to suggest the answers, no?

    The “blogosphere” is a nice, new, back-office fact check on the MSM, but obviously still needs the big boys with their snazzy “TV cameras”, fancy “viewership” and so-called “nielson ratings” in order to bring matters to the attention of folks for whom politics and the internet are occassional distractions.

    Seeing some folks get ahead of themselves and think otherwise (“You stole my instalanche, you little bastard”) amuses.

  26. “Man, I love the smell of Bill and Allah in the morning – or the afternoon too.”

  27. Salt Lick says:

    This stuff confuses me.  Are you guys saying that if I start a blog my dick is going to grow?  Because I couldn’t handle that.

    And that kid “Austin, the Little Bastard” on the T-shirt—is it true his father is “Fat Bastard” from “Austin Powers?” Or is that Oliver Willis?

    See, I told you it’s confusing.

  28. insomni says:

    Just wait ‘til Austin’s MOM sees that shirt…

  29. Carin says:

    Man, I’m gonna quit blogging now if I’m gonna grow a dick.  I mean, it just wouldn’t go well with the Vangelis.

    (my word is “not” — but I think I will)

  30. TomB says:

    Allah, chill, the Sox WON!

    What are you like when they lose?

    Anyway, you don’t want the blogmother to send you to your room.

    (although you’re probably already grounded)

  31. TomB says:

    Well Carin, look at the bite side, you’ll never be alone.

    Let us know how things, uh, work out…..

    …..preferably with pictures.

  32. norbizness says:

    Nerd p*rn for the 21st century:

    Brunette #1: Did you call the computer support guy?

    Brunette #2: Yes, I did. Damn, bitch!

    (knock on the door)

    Glenn Reynolds in denim cut-offs and a wife-beater: Somebody here order an Instalanche?

  33. Allah says:

    Don’t mind me, Tom.  I honestly do like Hewitt, to the point where I’ve started listening to his radio show via the Net.  I just think he gets crusade-happy and has a tendency to attribute bad motives to people who disagree with him.  (The worst example being his jibes at Bill and Jim Geraghty a few weeks ago for not slamming CBS over the Rathergate report.) Needless to say, I come down on his side of political issues far more often than not.  And, in all fairness, there are worse things one can be doing right now than promoting bloggers.

    I’m just pissed because the Sox lost Pedro.

  34. Tman says:

    for $14 mill a year? I’m not pissed. Let the Mets have ‘em.

    I have to say though Allah, the funniest shiite I’ve ever read on the web was your term for Pedro-

    Abu-Jew Tosser

    Talk about money ball…..

  35. Jeff Goldstein says:

    Just make pretend I’m not here.

  36. TomB says:

    Just make pretend I’m not here.

    We usually do.

    Anyway, TWO instalanches in as many days.

    You MUST be rich by now.

  37. Drumwaster says:

    Who’s not here? Who said that?

  38. TomB says:

    I just think he gets crusade-happy and has a tendency to attribute bad motives to people who disagree with him.  (The worst example being his jibes at Bill and Jim Geraghty a few weeks ago for not slamming CBS over the Rathergate report.)

    Yes, his constant harping on what HE thinks is the next important thing to cover for the blogs, reminds me of my mother constantly at me “you can do better.”

    Hence my WORLDWIDE INTERNET EXCLUSIVE nickname for Hugh (who I also like), blogmother (As I said on an earlier thread) as in: “No tsunami-blogging until you finish your Thornburg report, and EAT YOUR PEAS!”

    Hell, I thought it was immensely clever.

  39. Tman says:

    I QUESTION THE TIMING OF JEFF GOLDSTEINS COMMENT.

    WHO IS JEFF GOLDSTEIN ANYWAYS AND WHAT DOES HE THINK HE CAN DO ABOU-

    (say what now? this is his site? Oh.)

    NEVER MIND. CARRY ON.

    Apologies Jeff. Big Dicks and Allah seem to get folks a tad riled up. And bring up Red Sox Nation and it’s ON mutha….

  40. Fred says:

    It’s been what, like hours now, since this whole brouhaha erupted and still no photoshop job from Allah?!

    Maybe he really has retired.

  41. TomB says:

    In case anyone didn’t see, Colson made a brief appearance on the other thread with an “apology” for calling the kid a bastard, but nothing else. And strangely enough, the apology is exactly the same as he posted on other sites.

    So he must really mean it, or it’s just a cut-and-paste job.

    You decide.

  42. the UnPo says:

    How big is your dick when you publish the details of Golson’s attempt to have boy-sex with you and Golson approves?

    It’s good to be on top.

  43. Homer S. says:

    Who’s that guy who said just pretend I’m not here? 

    Oh!  What did that guy say when I said who’s that guy who said just pretend I’m not here? 

    I like Hugh Hewitt (mmmmmmm, Hewitt). 

    I like to listen to his radio show where he talks about his blog where he talks about his book.  And when I’m on the can I like to read his book where he talks about his radio show where he talks about his blog.  And whenever I’m surfing the web I make sure and check out his blog where he talks about his radio show where he talks about his book.

  44. Passerby says:

    Allah (semi-demi-auto)Bobbitt is talking blog-cock size? OT and on Goldstein’s dime? Oh! The bathos! This is your house Jeff so I respect all decisions you make here. But if I found a talented deadbeat sleeping on my sofa with his hand down his pants and drooling on my pillow at noon I’d hand him the want-ads and show him the door.

  45. OneDrummer says:

    So, can I get some deep-link with those flapjacks? Oh, I am sorry, I was visualizing Hewitt’s schlong, and I violated someone’s copyright, didn’t I?

  46. ilyka says:

    If we’re all such hot shit, let’s see what we can do on this one without handing it off to the big boys at Fox News.

    But the problem with that attitude is that it doesn’t get you invited to appear on Fox News.

    Nor does it get you . . . book deals.

    Or name recognition in the great big outside non-blog world.

    Or any of those other things bloggers are too pure of heart to covet like fame, fortune, money, power . . . .

    I figure you’ll keep seeing this schizoid “I Hate You!/Don’t Leave Me!” attitude from bloggers towards the mainstream media so long as they remain unwilling to acknowledge the inherent parasitic nature of the relationship.  You can’t make a name for yourself bashing the media without that media.

    Maybe some day it’ll become more symbiotic than parasitic, but it isn’t there yet.

  47. Circa Bellum says:

    Glad that whelp of a pup was straightened out.  Thank God we have REAL men like Jordan to do these things.  Most people don’t have the stomach for such work.

    Maybe there’s a reason they don’t…

  48. I get a free Free Austin t-shirt on principle, don’t I?

  49. Beth says:

    You people better not “deep-link” my site, or I’ll have to pull a Jordan on your asses!

    No fair!  I didn’t get a blogolanche!  Hundred-Percenter is such a Jordan!

    Hubris:  you’re being such a Jordan about the t-shirt thing!  wink

    [Keyword: “Fisk”]

  50. I figure you’ll keep seeing this schizoid “I Hate You!/Don’t Leave Me!” attitude from bloggers towards the mainstream media so long as they remain unwilling to acknowledge the inherent parasitic nature of the relationship.  You can’t make a name for yourself bashing the media without that media.

    Maybe some day it’ll become more symbiotic than parasitic, but it isn’t there yet.

    Why is it not symbiotic? Just because the tone of the interaction is negative?

    The MSM is an organ that levies unrelenting criticism at politicians, corporations, etc. It views this skepticism as its job. In need of its own police, blogs have sprung up to fill the need. And if/as blogs rise beyond hobbies, they will become corrupt as well.

    This is the nature of human interaction, and the bitchy relationship between the two forces, with blogs sucking off the info gathering of the MSM, is just fine.

    Personally, I don’t really know many intelligent bloggers that don’t acknowldge the dependent nature of the relationship. And it really is more symbiotic, as the MSM obviously needs to be scared enough to fact check. And it still doesnt motivate them sufficiently.

  51. Matt says:

    Oh, I got the cut ‘n paste apology from Jordan, too. Very moving. Just like that Iraqi lady hugging the soldier’s mom.

  52. – Elmo’s capture trumps any form of self-check among the MSM Ed. rooms ever devised by humanity…Insiders say Zarqawi is still biatching about losing the sales slip and we all know how anal WalMart is about those things….ALL YOUR CODDY’S ARE BELONG TO US!…

  53. Rob Roy Fingerhead says:

    Spammer Jordan removed all negative comments from the “apology” entry on his shoddy site. Including a few of mine. I wrote that I felt his form letter “apology” rang just as true as Document Dan Rather’s in the wake of the botched memo story. I also opined that his future seemed to be just as bright as Dan’s.

    I guess some people can’t handle the truth.

Comments are closed.